i have definitely evolved into that "what do you get for the guy who has everything?" type of asshole. my girlfriend doesn't even try, she will just cook for me (which unfortunately she is pretty bad at) and get extra wild in the sack (where she more than makes up for her culinary deficiencies).

my best friends are the two cheapest motherfuckers ever, i swear! one of them is a lawyer who pulls in low-sixes. we were in sint maarten, not a cheap vacay, and dude is like "i dunno if i should get my girlfriend anything. she loves chocolate, maybe some kinda dutch or french chocolate." i went to a dutch shop and dropped about $125 on dutch goodies for my dutch buddy who lives in colombia. my boy bought all of $9 worth of chocolate, $6 of which he ate that night. a $3 fucking tube of chocolate! i remember maybe twice he got me something for my birthday, ever, to the point where i stopped getting him shit, too. my other buddy is more broke than anything, i guess, usually he will come through with some doja or something though.

my parents have also given up. my mom just looks for something i am already buying and will pay for it, usually a pair of sneakers or something. she is cool, she really WANTS to do it. my pops usually pays for my league pass or tickets to a game, though i am racking up the IOUs there because i get to so many games for work/free that we almost never go as paying customers now.