> Maybe if we were more honest about the realities of long term
> partnership and parenting, more Black women would be open to other
> ways of living rather than looking at themselves as failures.


I also think, just in general (all humans), getting married and having kids and rocking with that comes from a lack of an ability to imagine other possibilities + social pressure. No one wants to do something new because it's risky and weird and no one wants to pick a losing option AND be an outsider.

Some of the happiest people I've seen are people who were true to their desires. "I like travel, drugs, new sexual partners and higher learning...I'm going to do that." - True story, a good friend I havent seen in 5 years just keeps living abroad, keeps racking up degrees, keeps doing drugs, and stay having a broad abroad.