Kids exist who were spanked and still loved their parents years later. But the trend of spanking in general is fairly irrefutable. The kids for whom "spanking works" would be the exception and not the rule.

Furthermore, and I say this sensitively, a major point of the study is the long-term effect. Even if spanking *does* net a short-term positive effect, it's impossible to see in the immediate time frame surrounding the spanking what the long-term effect of spanking a child will be, and it's certainly impossible to say with great confidence that it won't have a negative long-term effect.

I'm not saying anything about your kids or your treatment of them. It sounds like you've given your process serious thought, which is important. But it's also important, imo, for any parent using spanking to consider these studies and to consider that no one can tell that spanking "won't have a long-term impact" until it's too late. It's like my friends who say they "only smoke cigarettes at parties." I don't doubt that they're less likely to get lung cancer than people I know who smoke incessantly, but it doesn't mean the activity doesn't carry the overall risk.

That's why sharing these studies and discussing them with pro-spanking parents is important, imo. It's not about telling a parent how to raise his or her kid, which I would never do. I can't imagine the difficult and stressful choices a parent of five must have to make every hour of every day. It's about simply making sure that every parent has evidence beyond the anecdotal about the effect of spanking and that he or she chooses to spank or not spank having considered all the evidence first. Spanking is, scientifically, a gamble at best. And the studies show that you may not know which roll of the dice is the losing roll until years after it's happened.

Anyhow. I hope I didn't come across as emotional or patronizing, as that wasn't my intent. I'm sure you probably knew and considered the above already. Just figured it was worth posting something even-keeled here before the Spank Warz fully broke out and this point went quadruple platinum.