but really...it's not.

b/c this is real life. there are ppl in the world who have done absolutely terrible things to themselves and others. some of those ppl actually turn away from those bad acts and don't ever commit them again.

and those ppl don't just disappear - they live among us.

i was raised by a man who was a raging alcoholic in his past. he was a danger to himself and the community (he loved to drink and drive recklessly while drunk). he stopped drinking nearly 40 yrs ago. since then he has had 2 drinks - a sip of champagne at a wedding and another sip of wine at a family dinner while traveling. he will not ever be a drunk again. i am confident. and so is his wife - who long ago forgave him for his drinking and recklessness. she is still with him though he wronged her while he was a drunk and there is always the CHANCE that he'll fall back into that life. she inspires me when it comes to this issue, i guess. oh, and she's a teetotaler - doesn't drink and never has been a drinker. if she can forgive that man and stay w/him then i think i can too - for the right guy.

>i could get over some if not all these things under the right
>circumstances but those circumstances seldom if ever exist.
>overall, there is a lot of wisdom in the repugnance toward the
>behaviors enumerated in the OP

it's not for everyone. not everyone can handle being w/a person who has done the unthinkable. but IMO those ppl may have something wonderful to offer and i'm not necessarily willing to put so much focus on their awful past that i'd just ignore all of the wonderful things they offer currently and likely in the future. keep in mind in this OP the person is perfect for me. he has everything i want in a mate - but there's that checkered past that won't ever be repeated. IRL maybe the checkered has some likelihood of repetition. i think if the guy is otherwise perfect i am very likely to give the relationship a chance.