>I would never let someone I love go through that stuff if it
>was in my power to prevent it.

I always considered it to be like, (and this is an outsider to the religon, don't jump down my throat.) Your child needs to learn to ride a bike. But keeps falling due to differant reasons, (doesn't matter what) You watch to make sure everything is okay, but are forced to watch as he/she falls down and gets hurt repeatedly. You can easily stop this, but for the childs benefit, you let the learning continue.

Obviously this isn't a good analogy, but I hope you catch my drift. If this is still around I'll build on it tomarrow, hopefully my thoughts will come easier, It's been a long day.