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Topic subjectPersonal is Political: Engagement Rings ...
Topic URLhttp://board.okayplayer.com/okp.php?az=show_topic&forum=22&topic_id=28790
28790, Personal is Political: Engagement Rings ...
Posted by Fiver, Tue Feb-08-05 07:53 AM
yes, it's the tradition to go and shell out some serious loot for an engagement ring. however, knowing that you'd be supporting the diamond trade by purchasing an engagement ring and indirectly approving the torture of thousands of people in Africa, does it weigh heavily in your mind?

i haven't needed to face the issue myself, but i do see rings on the finger and think "they should also carry an African boy's hobbled foot in their purse." soo really, American Tradition vs. Global Care: who wins in your mind?

sidenote: i understand you can buy antique rings so the money goes nowhere near the current diamondmongers - BUT - doesn't that still perpetuate the cultural necessity for diamonds?
28791, I wouldn't buy one.
Posted by stravinskian, Tue Feb-08-05 08:20 AM
The main reason is that which you mentioned. Another issue, which is relevant as a point of principle if not of morality, is the fact that DeBeers was able to largely manufacture the demand *after* capturing an incredible monopoly over the supply. If you look at any culture in the world where this diamond tradition exists, it likely started with an enormous DeBeers marketing campaign.

I might be tempted to consider a synthetic diamond. As the technology improves, they could provide a mass-market alternative to blood diamonds. I have no idea whether the mystique of natural diamonds could transfer to synthetics. But my guess is that it could, since at one time this mystique didn't exist at all. I mean, if it came to be understood that the only difference between natural diamonds and unnatural ones is the fact that natural ones come at the cost of natural lives, I think most people would ask for unnatural ones. Or better yet, rethink their traditions entirely.

28792, This is an easy point to make to a male dominated board
Posted by solomon13, Tue Feb-08-05 08:55 AM
Take this over to GD and see what the females say. I suspect you'll see how intractable the "diamond culture" is. Not that I disagree with you, for that very same reason I do not buy gold, but those of us concsious enough and compassionate enough to act on this are few.
28793, it was intended for women and men...
Posted by Fiver, Tue Feb-08-05 09:07 AM
since men usually buy the shit, but largely due to the expectation from women (forgive the generalization).

28794, it's just not intended for females anymore...
Posted by blaKsK3L3ton, Tue Feb-08-05 09:18 AM
Hiphop and the rest of pop-culture artists and celebrities put pressure on the public to keep up with a diamond accessory or two. Main culprit or dare I say, public enemy #1: P.Diddy. he's probably got a whole village suffering for his extensive jewelry collection.

(c)2005: The Year of the Trife
28795, Everything is political
Posted by Nettrice, Tue Feb-08-05 09:33 AM
Our (western, American) cultural status quo supports all kinds of things that cause oppression somewhere else in the world. I find I have to question everything that is considered the "norm" (tradition). So I don't do certain things like wear gold or diamonds. It was a conscious decision and not about deprivation and I am the only one in my family who thinks like this. My mother encouraged this and I do think it is the role of parents (and educators) to encourage their children to think more critically about what they do, what messages are out there (media), and what they buy.
28796, of all the blinging done on BET
Posted by suave_bro, Tue Feb-08-05 09:35 AM
you wanna talk about engagement rings....WTF?
28797, the "bling" is more a fad than a tradition
Posted by Fiver, Tue Feb-08-05 09:56 AM
when the bling dies, the necessity of an engagement ring will still stand strong.

like, make-up is still used after glam-rock and hair metal.
28798, err...the people of sierra leonne slave just the same
Posted by suave_bro, Tue Feb-08-05 10:03 AM
over these diamonds whether they last 3 centuries, 3 days, or 3 weeks...

but let me see what your argument is: people wearing engagement rings is far worse than black people in america bling blinging in videos, at awards shows, singing about the bling in songs, raps etc.? and that because bling bling is just a "fad" (which it isnt) its not as important...seeing how black folks in sierra leonne are losing limbs over the same diamonds no matter whose finger they are on, i dont see the relevance of that point...

do u honestly believe that an engagement ring (ONE DIAMOND) is worse than THIS shit!?!



28799, understood...but let's try not to bicker over the example...
Posted by Fiver, Tue Feb-08-05 10:18 AM
>and that because bling bling is
>just a "fad" (which it isnt)

right, it's not akin to a fad: that's why i still wear a clock and africa medallions, and FAT gold chains, and one mesh glove. oh wait, i don't.

>do u honestly believe that an engagement ring (ONE DIAMOND)
>is worse than THIS shit!?!

i believe people buying diamonds for engagement, wedding anniversaries, retirement gifts, etc. will last a lot longer than the "bling" of today. granted, blingin' is definitely part of the problem, but i think in the long-run, the expected purchasing of jewelry outweighs the bling-obsession of today: unless your grandma is showing you her blinged-out medallion she got in 1926 (in those special cases, i'm wrong).
28800, Yeah, there were no diamonds before Puffy...
Posted by SoulHonky, Wed Feb-09-05 10:27 AM
People will always be buying diamond jewelry, or jewelry that will proft people who abuse their workers (I'm sure most gold mines aren't the best places to work.)

Why not just answer the question? Why did you come up with engagement rings? Or are you trying to find a political excuse to get out of a personal problem?
28801, RE: Personal is Political: Engagement Rings ...
Posted by Deselune, Tue Feb-08-05 11:13 AM
Regardless of what the setting is ring or not you can get diamonds that are non conflict or non blood diamonds. Call me a silly girl but I want my damn engagement ring, blood free of course, but I'd take another kind of stone.
28802, besides antique rings...
Posted by Fiver, Tue Feb-08-05 12:20 PM
...what are the other options? help us. where does one turn?
28803, There are man-made diamonds
Posted by Cocobrotha2, Wed Feb-09-05 02:41 AM
A couple companies create diamonds through the application of pressure and heat to carbon. They can create diamonds just as good as those dug from the earth and are 30% cheaper. Here's a link to a story about them: http://pubs.acs.org/cen/coverstory/8205/8205diamonds.html

I mentioned this all to my gf and she replied "What is that, cubic zirconia? I don't want an imitation. A real diamond is from the earth".

I think man-made diamonds could destablize the whole diamond mining industry but as long as my gf's viewpoint is prevalent (which I believe it is), man-made diamonds won't be a viable option to most consumers.
28804, Here's where you can find a list of diamond dealers
Posted by Deselune, Mon Mar-07-05 12:09 PM
28805, just pay your fucking taxes, kiddd
Posted by chrisdefendorf, Wed Feb-09-05 10:19 AM
mother's worry...

diamonds are consciousnessess too. stop punishing your diamonds, you need to listen to crisis of martyrhood dub
comming soon

blog (updated during the day, and
then finished at 11PM EST)

Christopher (the name means
"chris... Dear Friend") Defendorf (the
name mean
"Raspberry" nahmean)

28806, Blank...
Posted by SoulHonky, Wed Feb-09-05 10:22 AM
28807, Personally I refuse to buy them. and I tell people
Posted by FireBrand, Sat Mar-05-05 08:33 AM
about blood diamonds. they ask me what my fiancee says, and I tell them the truth. She is more against it that I am.


"...I'm telling ya these walls are
funny. First you hate 'em, then
you get used to 'em. Enough,
time passes, you get so you
depend on 'em. That's

Red, The Shawshank Redemption.

Inaug'ral Member of the OkaySports Hall of Fame.

28808, There's this frontline
Posted by kayru99, Sat Mar-05-05 08:40 PM
documentary about the histoery of the diamond trade and how the demand for engagement rings was manufactured by 1930's hollywood. So, nah...fuck diamonds, engagement or otherwise.
28809, agreed. but what of those people that believe in
Posted by FireBrand, Sat Mar-05-05 08:59 PM

There are ways to make manufactured diamonds. They have machines for that now.

what of that process?


"...I'm telling ya these walls are
funny. First you hate 'em, then
you get used to 'em. Enough,
time passes, you get so you
depend on 'em. That's

Red, The Shawshank Redemption.

Inaug'ral Member of the OkaySports Hall of Fame.

28810, For those who gotta have a diamond
Posted by kayru99, Sun Mar-06-05 10:22 AM
I got no beef with the manmade ones...
28811, Buy one without diamonds
Posted by Benzinos Little Helper, Sun Mar-06-05 05:59 PM
Who says an engagement ring has to have diamonds?
28812, RE: Buy one without diamonds
Posted by deafening_silence, Sun Mar-06-05 06:59 PM
Exactly...a ring doesn't need diamonds to be beautiful... a man shouldn't have to present the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with diamonds to truly show how much he loves her... it's things like diamonds and all the other fancy things that take away the real importance of the event...
28813, 'non-conflict diamonds'
Posted by love2000, Mon Mar-07-05 08:12 AM

because I sure planned on using this as an argument to reject buying a ring one day...
28814, I have looked into non conflict diamonds......
Posted by BlakGirlSoul, Mon Mar-07-05 11:16 AM
and that is what I have requested from my S.O.
Laying next to you with my arms around you in the morning is too good to be true, and I cherish it completely.
You and I are best friends , and hopefully lovers for life
If this was a mistake...its the best one GOD ever made ~my mayne

Sh*t that I just LOVE.......
~I love black college bands - THEY ROCK
~I love playing my music loud in my car - scares whitey
~I love the scent of my man - *sniff*
~I love love love love love to Dance - I am the Dancing Machine

She toss a mean salad too ~B Block

"I wanna save the world and niggas too." ~Me

Check This Out: www.verbalisms.com
28815, That DeBeers ad pissed me off.
Posted by Battousai, Mon Mar-07-05 10:45 AM
"Make three months' salary last forever by buying a diamond ring? Thanks to the ring, IT'S ALREADY GONE, ASSHOLE!"

There's victimization on both ends. People are getting killed over control of diamond production, and people are getting ripped off over conspicuous consumption.

My fiancee-to-be will get a ring-pop.