Posted by guest, Wed May-10-00 05:59 PM
its 11:34 in the evening, and trying to come up with thoughts as to why...shit, I've got so many goals I can drown in the salty sweat on my forehead caused by the brain-action alone, the grey matter action caused by thinking...about dreams, goals, whatever...
I did the same shit 99.2% of the people who eat Grade A cheese did this past new years, THE NEW MILLINEUM, promise myself I would make changes and chase those childhood dreams that sprouted in my mind ages ago. Good intentions...really tried to make it real in the beginning, but january flew by into april, and now we are in May, my bornday month...dammit, I remember all those dreams I had when I was 18, then 20, then 25....shit by now, I was supposed to be a world famous influential black artist, commanding respect from all who dared enter my creative cipher. I was supposed to be doing my own thing-never wanted to be a multi-millionaire, but just comfortable. Money allows a certain degree of comfort.
I turn around 10 years later, and I see other people doing the do, while I sit on the sideline, knowing in my heart of hearts, that 'mine' is just as tasty as the next mans...'mine' for me is painting/writing.
I want to be an artist.
Let me bring a smile to someone's face after they look at my work. Let me listen to someone try to decipher the meaning of the work, and open a doorway I've never passed thru. Shiiiiiit, you can curse me out and tell me my work is garbage, and if your motives are pure, so be it, but damn, feel me....
Word to the wise,my okayplayer brethren, go with your heart, period.
Don't go thru life in the shadows of your parents desires for your success, if they are not truly your own.
Moma might think you'd make a great genetical engineer, but if you want to be a singer, atleast try it before you concede defeat.You might be a terrible singer and score multi-platinum hits, or your vocals could waft sweetly in the air like Nina Simone but never get any play or recognition or props. But damn, atleast try!!!!!
Think about the creative, beautiful, inspiring minds that you feel here at okayplayer everyday...there are some BAAAAAAAD mofo's in hea, creatively speaking-all of that energy concentrated in one central location in cyberspace at various points and time, linked by a love of something, be it hip hop/Roots/Comm/fire....
Life is too damn short people. My goal might be on the brink of coming true, after several years of disappointments, to gain a Masters in Fine Art and route some of God's arrows thru me to you collectively.
Feel me...someone long ago, either in the dank hull of a slave-carrier, or crouching in the limbs of a Southern cypress tree, saw their life coming to an end, in the physical. Their only solace would be knowing that hopefully one day, their childrens' children would gain the opportunity denied them. Our ancestors, as they walked off those floating concentration camps in chains by the MILLIONS, and fell into the blue sea vowing never to be enslaved, had to envision the possibility of triumph in us. Our future was a gift from them, and it is the ultimate disrespect to them if we don't utilize our creative gifts to their fullest.
People, whatever that goal is, aspire to make it real. Forgive me for preachin, but my grandaddy(bless the dead) just wanted to speak a lil something thru me to you.
Rise up chilluns....rise...
expand yer artistic parameters!
"Picasso sucks...but damn he painted some purty pictures"...me
"I'm surgin up when I'm emergin..." Pharoah Monch