>I am often amused at how difficult it is for white folks to
>put themselves in the shoes of Black folks, no matter how
>close, how intimate, how loving the relationship. From a
>political standpoint, it has much to do with power and
>influence...white folks benefit more than Black people ever
>have. What comes along with this is the false expectations
>and conditions folks experience as of result of this power.
>
>What is the next step beyond acknowledgement?

I'm not sure I know what benefit I receive (beyond having a wonderful supportive woman with me): i've caught beat downs, been alienated from a power structure I could have theoretically integrated into, brought us endless scrutiny and bullshit, and... yeah. S'about it. Where are these benefits I'm supposed to be recieving?

At 17 years old, you weren't necessarily going to get sincere, mature relationship regardless of race. I'm sorry it was traumatic, but you're saying the other person involved came from a long, storied wealthy Southern community, so I don't think it's indicative of the blue collar shlubs like myself just looking for someone to be happy with.