21681, This is difficult|
Posted by Wendell, Fri Sep-01-00 10:09 AM
and there is no definite answer to this dilema, but there are solutions.
Talk with and guide our next generation. I'm including the extended family, the kids in your neighborhood and your friends kids etc. If that means providing a positive example or stopping a kid when you see them doing wrong. Do it!!! We cannot afford to be afraid of our own children. I know from my experiences, when I see a young kid doing wrong, they don't know it. They don't have anything else to do and nobody said stop, so they do whatever comes to mind. I just don't believe that our children are inherently bad, so if I see something that's wrong I'll go talk to them. My wife thinks one of these 14 year olds is gonna shoot me for telling them to stop cursing, but I just don't think thats gonna happen.
I got a perfect example: One night, last summer, my wife and I got in about 9:30 p.m. There was a lot of noise in the front of the house, so I went outside to see what was going on. My neigbors were out having a drink on the porch. One of them says: "Look at your kids over there tearing up the school." There is a grammar school across the street from my house and tonight the neighborhood kids (about 10 to 12 of them) were riding this brand new fence. Basically, they were gonna break it. My first question was: "Why are you watching them do this?" They were like "I aint saying nothing to them kids!!" So I walk across the street and talk to the kids. I ask them what they're doing? All together they say "nothing!!" I explain that the fence is there for them and that the adults in the neighborhood paid for that fence (through taxes). They apologize and disband, I reminded them that they should be in the house by now because it is late. My wife's like: "what did you say to them?" Nothing, I just talked to them. These are the same kids that I have water fights with in the summer, they know who I am, they know where I live. I pay them for shoveling my snow. I speak to them when they walk past the house. I buy the cookies and candy when they sell them. I shake their hand and me them look me in the eye when they talk.
I am a neighbor.
That's how I was raised.