when i went natural there was NO Erykah and NO Jill. when i went natural i was at a time in my life where i was very tired of looking in the mirror and being displeased by what i saw. my features did not fit my permed head, and no matter how many compliments i would get, deep inside i felt it was not me.

i looked at the pictures of my mom when she had her hair natural in the early 80's. she was quite beautiful and i look like her. to me, movies like School Daze and other things also were brought to my consiousness although it would not be until much later that i would be brave enough to do what i felt needed to be done.

while i had a perm i would hear things like," you got that GOOD hair" while my girl who was struggling to achieve that look, just felt bad, AND would have looked better, as every woman would, with the hair she was born with, not a red weave.

I began to wrap my hair in some african cloth my best friend had when she was in Burkina Faso(spelling?), West Africa. She taught me how to wrap it and i did so most of the time. the LAST time i permed my hair was graduation. By Thanksgiving my perm had grown out and i cut it off. i haven't gone back since and i don't care to. i am muslim so no one but my friends and fam see my hair anyway and that it how i like it. it was my choice, not a fad, and you can't see it anyway.

now, about judging people based upon thier outward appearance is erronious. i have run into many a chicken-head in "consious"(lol!) clothing, and many a consious woman with a perm. it is one thing to just BLAST an individual while crying that everyone should be pleased and secure with thier natural state, and another thing to show compassion and consider the amount of programming many people have gone through.

Reveal to people in a CARING way what you know and have come to realize about the mentality...that everyone in the world feels fine about thier features BUT black folks. Don't think that you are better, think that you have been SPARED and teach others that they might want to at least reconsider thier positions. if they remain with a perm, so be it, the outside does not ALWAYS reflect what is on the inside, and there is a 50/50 chance that this is the case.

should every individual with a perm be looked over? do you not want to be "seen" with a mate who has a perm? do you NOT have the capacity to bring a sister up into the realm of caring for her spirit, body, and mind? if you look everyone "unnatural" over then what Help are YOU? you ain't changin' a thang.

the turn in fashion is still a good fad to me. maybe this will lead to them researching other avenues for the health of thier spirit, mind, and body.

a long post, I know.

Peace,

Sudani