My daughter: Nobantu Zenzele Akili, is now 8, in the 4th grade, a vegetarian and former lock-wearer. At 8 she is just now really starting to see herself as different than the norm from having 2 parents in a loving committed relationship together and with her to her African-centered life-style. There are questions, struggles and I've (we've) determined to pick and choose our battles: tired of locks? OK, Eat meat, no. Tired of piano lessons? fine. Watch anything but educational t.v. during the week and then only for an hour? NO. From Friday to Sunday, you can watch cartoons, the WB, what ever. We will watch and laugh and critique together.

As far as religion, well I'm teaching her acceptance of different religions/spiritual systems/world views.(I hate the word tolerance, it sounds like you don't really like the shit but you'll tolerate it.) She goes to church with Grandma sometimes and like someone said, the Black church (Baptist or Catholic)is a hotbed of Black culture. It's like the beauty shop or barber shop. I'll take her to get her hair washed and conditioned there just for the culture, you know? She knows I'm not Christian or Muslium but I'm still trying to find a religion that fits my personal view of God. The closest I've come is Earthseed with out the space travel(read Octavia Butler's Parable of the Sower and Parable of the Talents).

In the end, you gotta love em, respect em, encourage them and raise em to be free open honest thinkers lovers, planners, builders.