....and unlike pro's my shit is an actual expression about how i feel about this site rather than a shameless attempt at politrix

seriously tho- y'all just cream your pants to see your name in a post dont y'all...

anyways im seeing that the general consensus on this battle is that i didnt come with the punchlines like pro did

you guys have seen my punches-- nobody is as devastating with the personal attacks as i am-- zin didnt come around for like two weeks after i smashed him

also noticed ric changed up the soundclick a bit...

..i would have gladly given pro the same treatment but as nuke pointed out we know nothing about dude-- in fact i been assuming hes a dude this whole time without knowing for sure

perhaps dude has something to fear???

i on the other hand am a walking punchline- i proudly rep being a white jewish stoner college boy

i let you all know im in france- come on pro FRANCE- im very disappointed you didnt take at least one shot at that little factoid right there

and despite being completely new to this and not taking it half as seriously as some of y'all i am fully willing to broadcast my beats AND my voice on the internet

so anyways i got no dirt on pro and he has all sorts on me and still his punchlines were STILL largely generic- my shit wasnt personal but it was unique anything that i would have made up about dude besides the one major punch that i did throw would have been just generic

besides all that a battle isnt just straight debasing the other person through wisecracks- its debasing them in terms of skill- my shit might have just been boasts but the wordplay and humor in there as well as the rhyming and flow was miles past pro's shit

my boasts WERE punches cause i was really backing them up showing that im lyrically way beyond lif--- dudes "punches" that you speak of were weak anyways and his shit didnt even rhyme well

let me get vintage dub and break it down:



Lif massacre ya scripts - annihalate carnage/
every word Dub spit is trash - i'm talking straight garbage!!/

this is what im talking about- straight up generic

and if you gonna use tired shit like calling someone garbage find a creative way to do it- like your shits more trashy than trailers girls

this is shit that might as well be directly bitten cause its been done so many times

"aaawwww not that dude Dub again! yeah, he gon' get drug again!/
and if they vote for him, then he must be making luv to them!"/

all right this is ok- once againt he must be making love to voters is not unique whatsoever but this is better than "hes trash- garbage!"

still throwing the awwwww in there is weak- this is a trend that continues throughout lifs verse- he throws in one syllable exclamations to make his shit rhyme or work but they mean nothing in terms of content- in a skilled rhymers piece i.e mine every word is integral

its done again here with cuz

i spin u round cuz - leave u split on ya pivot!/
cause u the only Dubs i ever seen to fit on a Civic!!/

now obviously every one of us does that sometimes but dude uses one syllable throwaway words so much in this piece that it really takes away from it

now of course these lines were funny- although once again generic- i been here a while lif is by no means the first person to use my screename in this manner

see, i come out gunning to make this dude cripple/
while u running round the net looking at other dude's nipples!!!/
some thought that was cute, but i was far from it/
cause u aint tell them dudes u prolly' got off on it!!/

now here lif is not being generic- the first two lines in this group were aimed right at me- funny shit- thing is he killed it cause the second half of this blatantly doesnt rhyme

from it and on it dont rhyme at all- is he rhyming "it" with "it" here?

rhyming a word with itself is whack--- like this next shit for example

and ya'll kats buggin'; it aint good to hype rappers!/
'specially Hacksaw-Jim-Dugan-look-alike-rappers!!/

"rappers" rhyming with "rappers"- this shows no lyrical skill whatsoever

besides this the punchline itself is just weak

no one hypes me on here- 99.9% of y'all hate my ass

and i dont really look like hacksaw duggan- anyone who seen my pic knows i dont have that lovely hair and beard- BUT- even if i did saying this is basically saying "you look like a really big strong dude who could kick the shit out of me with one hand tied behind his back"

plus shakeet who has quite the special friendship with lif if y'all haven't noticed is gonna completely dismiss my shit cause of one line referencing dennis the menace is according to him "gay"

if lines referencing cartoons are gay then lines referencing watching pro wrestling- a bunch of scantily clad dudes grabbing on eachother- are fucking flaming

besides sha- how is dennis the menace gay and you infatuation with heman is perfectly acceptable?

anyways enough on that line--

so what it look like scrappa? Lif reigning and shining/
killin' the only dude on the board complaining and whining!/

more generic shit- plus the throwaway word scrappa

besides i got nothing to complain about i been quietly mopping the floor with all of y'all for weeks now

now i know cats are gonna see this right here as complaining but its not- i got nothing to complain about this round was a continued demonstration of my lyrical superiority- this aint a complaint is school in session

and i aint never in my life heard of luck that dras-tic!/
cause it's a Miracle that u even got past Ric!!/

thats ok i guess- i wouldnt necessarily highlight the roll i was on tho if i was lif- his journey through the brackets has been largely bush league- especially compared to the folks i smashed-- thats right ric and zin i dont think you suck im just better

yo, u overacheived! but now u slow to receive/
that i aint in the game playa - dawg, i'm over tha league!/

i overacheived- so basically you acknowledging that i was nice???

i get his meaning in here but it takes a minute- not cause hes deep but it was a forced fit into this rhyme scheme

kats know who's mighty - they laugh at what they witnessing/
and in the Beat Society, u a second class citizen!/

funny- one of the few bright spots in this awful verse

i'm gettin' wit' my socials - this is Pro's function/
while u tha weakest in writtens, vocals, AND productions!!/

now this is week on two counts- first off rhyming function and production is a stretch at best

secondly- how you gonna call me weak on vocal when you hide your voice like a little bitch lif?

i put audios up from day 1- aint nobody listened that first time which was probably a good thing- but still, this shit just highlights my main punchlines and points about lif

Lif drop rooks hard and leave ya hooks scarred!/
even 5-0 couldn't put u behind good bars!!/

this was funny- but what you mean leaving hooks scarred- are you talking about punching me on the hands?- it rhymes well but i think you just forced it to fit with your punchline

i southpaw ya mouth par, u aint got a hope!/
unless u make up other screennames and come back and vote!/

now this right here- besides being generic- was the worst shit lyrically in this whole dismal mess

"i southpaw ya mouth par?!?!??!?"

what the fuck is that?

i know what southpaw ya mouth means but the use of par in here is the ultimate one syllable throwaway

this means absolutely dick

tha decision occured b4 ya vision was blurred/
can't win rook of the year on the injured reserve!!/

b4- thats so corny- like a little girl on im

the second line of this was funny but the first line is another forced thing just thrown in to include the second- it barely means anything

and don't flex duke, cause u aint fit son/
i give repect where respect's due, so u'ont get none!/

"fit son" and "get none" kind of a weak rhyme- i guess he meant us to read it kind of as "git"- still with this he continues overusing one syllable throwaway words to make his rhymes stick- this is the kind of shit i used to do before as y'all say my rhymes got "better"

and finally this closer line which is just whack on soooo many levels

i spit that hole-in-one post - dun u sub-par/
this nicca Dubs just got blown like London sub cars!!/

first off a golf reference in a battle rhyme- i thought i was the white guy here?

secondly speaking of which how you gonna drop the n-bomb on me when im a proud cracka gangsta

thirdly didnt you just use "par"- granted it was completely out of context and didnt mean shit but still a good rhymer should avoid using the same word close to itself

and finally the london line- just not cool at all- i mean that is just in such poor taste people on this very board lost friends in that shit and you up here throwing it in this battle

whack

now on to my verse--- i want to break it down cause i think pho might have been on to something and yall missed half the meaning in my shit

cause i was punching dude- HARD- as y'all have said it was boasts but they backed themselves up cause my flow and rhyming were better and my shit is more creative and funnier than his

i’m on the attack came in swinging from the get go
i wrote this rhyme on the paris metro
dub bringing hip hop to the land of techno- let’s go

they call the subway over here the "metro"

this is not really directed at prolif but i actually wrote this verse on the train and nothign can describe how weird it is to be in this city bumping meth and red in my phones and writing verses and shit

obviously folks listen to hip hop here- but its just different- and most of the time you go out all you hear is techno crap

it’s hdub on the verse- you know i got the tendency
to wreck heads worse than crack rock dependency

just a boast but funnier and involving a more complex rhyme than any of pros shit

rap dennis the menace-y- getting old heads steamed
spit miracle streams- water flows into hennessy deemed

for those who dont know dennis the menace stay fucking with old man wilson- kind of like i fucked with all the crusty old okp's who thought they were the shit-- this also points out the fact that a lot of you are in your 30's and shit while im not even legal

the second half of this is a reference to how quickly i have improved at EVERY aspect of the rap game- using the metaphor of jesus' miracle of turning water in to wine except with a little hood twist

rip greens smokier than mountains in tennessee dreams
the most high supreme i post skys above means

smoky mountains is a range in tenn. for those who dont know

and im the most high in two sentences- a champion stoner and the best lyricist in this shit- far beyond being above average- skys above means as in the mean average

like teams in queens- i make fools into believers
that its my crown- the rest are all thievers

a reference to the NY Mets ballclub based in Queens- an embarassment to a city with a beautiful baseball tradition this squad hasnt won shit in 20 years- they so pathetic their slogan is "you gotta believe"

sick of pussies- y’all beavers- leave!
im the definition of skilled- y’all can check ask jeeves

beaver is slang for cooch- and ask jeeves is an old search engine that you couold ask questions like "what does skilled mean?" or "exactly how much does lif' verse suck?"

Prolif falls like leaves- dub do more damage than jabs
still making ‘em bleed tho im far from the lab

self explanatory- im killing y'all while im on vacation

im spitting manos de piedra- you no harder than flab
im settling scores- demanding whack cats pay tabs
so Pro Knows i hunt fools down like cap ahabs

photo explained the manos de piedra thing so i wont do that- captain ahab is the main character in moby dick- dude was insane as all hell and spent his whole life chasing the titular white whale across the oceans and hunting his ass

throwing knows name here in conjunction with being hunted down and the far from the lab thing is me hinting at the obvious fact that knowone is afraid to see me in this shit

dog delayed the tourney every chance he had- you guys were hoping i would lose steam on vacation- as the lab and the paris lines indicate- i didnt

also- as sha and others have pointed out the brackets were definitely not even remotely random as ive said before i had the best in each round up until now where i got the "rest"

take cabs- you still cant catch up to my timbs
i “keep on moving” like im rapping in hymns
im packing ‘em in- shining bright while ya lights are dimmed
vicodin- cant kill the pain that I types him in

"keep on moving"- a famous old gospel church song- here i use it to illustrate how despite all the obstacles from know and the hate from zin ric frak et al i still made it all this way

and sha get out of here with that rook of the year nonsense- you the one who keeps bringing it up but you went out in rd. 1 both pro and i are rooks who had better records than you this year

so i start this describing my rise and doing some more boasting-- and then with the vicodin shit i begin to throw punches talking about how lif is getting lyrically smashed

which i continue through here---

i fights to win- losing to no rhyme-
mic slicing him- its murder at showtime
in no time look like lif OD’d on dubs dope lines
im ending beefs- a slaughterhouse to y’all bovines

this is pretty self explanatory as well- the OD- dope connection

and then the use of the technical name for cows to describe beef

this next part continues the punching and boasting plus talk of how i get lif and everyone else running scared- further emphasizing that im doing all of this in paris way out of my routine and comfort zone

at post time send MC’s into worldwide panic wit’ my antics
i effortlessly rock the whole globe transatlantic-
wit’ more energy than manics- i blow up like panoramics
prolif you aint hard- im steel you ceramics dammit
the size of my skill levels gigantic- write star systems and planets
was in to street retail now im liking verse damage

and then finally my main point and punchline:

usually manage to spit personal but lif leaves no details
so ill just dis versatile- assume he’s a preteen female
that’s why he hides his voice Pro only raps in email

lif gives no information about himself- i gotta start speculating about what hes hiding and why hes hiding it

besides its really amazing that with all the stuff you guys could draw from to dis me lifs verse is so whack- i got nothing to diss lif on but lack of audio and lack of lyrical quality- hence the boasting "im better then" "i smash him like" type shit rather than the fuck you and your girl or fuck you and your lisp type shit i did for ric and zin

oh wait no i didnt bring up the lisp before i thought it was too mean

oops

in the context of this punchline and the audio i posted pro just looks like a fake ass net writer-- i mean he makes hot beats but this aint soundclash this is on lyrics and in written or sonic quality i bust him

i dont think dude is bad- honestly i wouldnt have wanted him in round one- thing is pro you lose steam after around two verses- with time your shit goes from smart funny and flowing to the type of garbage we saw in this round- the best example of this is in that vastly overhyped battle with shakeet- started out fire but the latter rounds were whask shit

anyways i was expecting to be hated out of this from the first- im amazed it took this long- as far im concerned with the wins i piled up (including this round imo for everything mentioned above) there is no question who the king of this shit is

as far as im concerned the tourney is over- i just spanked pro- and know got spanked by zin- who i smashed- a while back

y'all can say what you want i know i killed it and i made this shit as detailed as could be to back that up in teh archives for all to see- and y'all can say im mad but the truth is im in the city of lights with my girl a phat sack and a big brick of hash- what the fuck i got to be mad about??--- what about y'all- what are you doing thats so great- lyrically or in the real world???!?!?!?!?


bwahahahahahahaha*

so now that i've gotten the crown- yeah thats right i just crowned myself but my reasons have been fully explained- in my first tourney appearance i think im gonna take a break from battling for a while

as i said to yukon- it was a nice tool when i was first trying to develop my rhyming skills but now ive grown past it- all y'all want is fat jokes and allusions about folks' sexualities regardless of quality- im trying to work on my audio game and im ready to be writing more meaningful lyrics

besides that i need to enjoy my vacation and get off computers- i wouldnt have been checking this shit at all except know was kind of bitch made and had this drag on forever

im officailly jacking the crown and going into lurk mode for a while

when i come back ill think about giving axe and know a 3 rounder since theyre pretty much the only ones i havent sonned yet- tek thanks for letting me get you in between rounds it helps legitimize my rule- but like i said i think im past battling