Aight Lovies...

I couldn't take this any longer...the men's post is a GOOD one...with the bondin, relatin n stuff....

nuthin off limits....good insight...

Let's do this for us...

Spinoff?? so what?

We TOO go thru stuff...and honestly...

i'd *rather* be virtual with mine as opposed to REALLY askin my mamanem...

so Ladies...lemme start with this...

In reading the realest post in the world...Auset1 eloqently talks about love...and the nonbelief in the "American Tailed" ending...
Whas your take on this?

I mean..we got the Oprahs..and the Iyanlas..and all them chantin..."Love Yourselllllfe"...and thas fine...

is that always enuff?


Let's rap a taste, Sistaz....

*flashes...runs!*

Just returning the favor...I'm gonna lurk ALL in this one like ya'll is in ours.

>Just returning the favor...I'm gonna lurk ALL in this one like
>ya'll is in ours.

do folk actually believe because a post is addressed specifically to one group or one person, on a public message board, that others won't look, lurk or respond?

freaking sexist that shit is either.

Cause I LOVE ME. You hear me? And you'd be a fool not to love me, too.

But man, when it's cold outsiiiiide (c) Bobby Wo.

Loving oneself keeps a woman from making too many fucked up decisions, but still, that ain't enough. You want to love yourself and have someone present themselves to you for you to love.

u just preached a sermon...

i'm sayin..

cuz i'm lonely...i don't love myself??

i'm tired of hearin that...

hehe

But what about the backrub I want/would like?

I'm self sufficient and please understand that I LOVE ME.

Yeah, I'm sick of hearing that shit, too.

*goes back to lurking quietly in post*

I get sick'a people sayin "you gotta love yo self first". That's cool and all but sh*t if Bobby and Whitney can find each other wtf can't I find my just as phuked up male counterpart? I have to have some serious one on ones with God about that mess cuz I just don't understand - especially since patience is NOT my virtue. He knows that...and I ask for grace/mercy er'day too...but it's hard out here for a single woman. Yeah I can take care of myself but cot dammit if I don't want a break sometimes. It's like someone (dayum I forgot) said in the confession wed, I've been a good girl all this time and for what? WHAT?!

(sorry bout the rant but I'm frustrated)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

DOES NOT PAY. If you ain't putting out, consider yaself dropped! lol

The shit don't pay AT ALL.

I live on Good Girl Lane. You make a right on Lonely Street and it's down at the end, on the left.

this is for the E cups and up...

cuz errbody else can buy they joints in any store..

but ladies...

any new colors for the spring?

does the transparant strap jumpoff work for u? I wanna try it...cuz i want something different...but i'm scared...


and lastly

shoulder bruises...yawl got these...looks like u're still wearin the bra when u take it off...

whas the remedy...cocoa budda??

I don't anymore, though. You gotta get the right fitting bra--if that's happening, your bra's too small.

And yes, Palmer's will get rid of those grooves.

my bras fit...

i get fitted tri monthly (which is ESSENTIAL)
so i'm wearin the right size...

my babies are just heavy...

i'm not a big girl..but they are..so sometimes the imbalance (that a word?) causes more grooves...

whas palmers?

Palmer's Cocoa Butter.

It got rid of my grooves.

i got suave...that don't work...

i was gon use that cocoa budda in a rollup stick thingy...but
it's all waxylike...

aight...the palmers i'ma try...

goodness bless Playtex for having those half sizes.
and my left breast is significantly smaller than my right.
should i be concerned?

they need a "D and a half" size.

nothing unusual at all

i wish they had 1/4th sizes for shoes
but yeah half cups are great!!

i've passed up far too many pairs already!

I went in there and had like 3 salespeople and one bystander trying to find the "right" bra. They measured and pulled and pinched. They tried all kinds of cuts and cups and coverages. Nope, nada. In the end, they just had to give up!
and it's not like i'm odd or anything. I'd say I'm a 34-36 D - DD depending on which bra i'm wearing at the time.

What's saved me? Gap Body. Gap Body. Gap Body.
try it.


My good friend who is tiny tiny xtra petite but with huge boobs (Must be an F at least) says she finds cute bras that fit at Lane Bryant. I haven't tried that yet. Anyone here?

i looove their bras
and panties.

I wear a 38DD and I have yet to see a bra that isn't a demi bra...i like full coverage.

Lane Bryant is alright...but what the hell part of the game is these damn padded bras, that's the LAST thing i want or need. My breasts already sweat....that extra padding isn't helping the fact.

they need to un-pad them joints.

>I wear a 38DD and I have yet to see a bra that isn't a demi
>bra...i like full coverage.

we are on the same page in regards to size and I've been to gap body, their selection is pretty nice and they always have sales, unlike VS, which is pretty crappy anyway.

>they need to un-pad them joints.

truer words have never been spoken.

gap body has the DDs.
AND SALES
Vickies never has sales except for the semi annual joint really and that's always picked over!

that's 14.99 :)

you can order the gap body bras from the website? i never see any bras in my size at the gap stores...i'll check and see if there is a place in ATL.

i like gap's panties though. i've given up on victoria's secret because the bras come apart after a while and they just aren't all that great anymore :(

and ain't shit in there but D and C's. It's false advertisement.

I go in the stores and start looking toward the floor when I come in there cause all our sizes aren't hanging up and looking non-wrinkled. NOOOOO

our shit is in the drawer at the bottom closest to the damn floor, and of course they only come in taupe, white, and black.

Actually, I went the other day and they had teal *gasp*

www.gapbody.com
it's crazy, cuz all the damn gaps I been to in my life (and they're everywhere) I've only seen ONE GapBody store. One. It's cool though, cuz you can browse the clearance racks.

And they figure that the b-cup ladies want padding too...i'm happy with my breasts i don't need nothing extra

i got hooked on them when i took a pt job there last year - their bras are the only ones i wear now - i used to max out my discount every month...

>this is for the E cups and up...
>
>cuz errbody else can buy they joints in any store..
>
>but ladies...

i'm not too far from E...i'm at a DD now.


>
>any new colors for the spring?

i bought a really cute melon colored bra from Olga. I'm looking for a really good minimizer though.

>
>does the transparant strap jumpoff work for u?

i haven't had a problem with them...however just to be on the safe side, don't throw those bras in the washing machine all willy-nilly...if you are one that doesn't hand wash their bras or wash them in a lingerie bag.

I wanna try
>it...cuz i want something different...but i'm scared...
>
>
>and lastly
>
>shoulder bruises...yawl got these...looks like u're still
>wearin the bra when u take it off...

girl...i had dark marks from them damn bras, and i even bought the ones with the thick pads on the shoulder...however those aren't cute :(. i use a mixture of cocoa butter, shea butter, evening primose oil and vitamin e....it's in a body butter form.

where u at ma?

i don't got BROKE with Bravissimo...


whas new?

i think we wear the same size....holla

cuz everbody else can't buy their shit at any store because I'm a B cup but I have a 44 size back I have a hard time finding bras all the time. Yes, yes it's a cruel thing when you gained over 50 pounds and you're the same cup size. I haven't been doing any shopping recently, but the ony place I'm able to find anything cute or pretty and not too expensive is at Lane Bryant.

i'm in an HH cup..but only a 34...36 back

try findin a 34I bra in publik...

not happenin..

my girls aint THAT big but they stay bouncin when im on the treadmill...

and this is with 2 of them joints on...

anybody recommend something that can strap me down fa'real???

finding a good sports bra without feeling like i'm being bound like a sausage. I don't want them squished together. I want support.

I think this has contributed to my lack of exercise.

i think that they sell them at target.

i'll try and find a link, but I know that it looks like a sports bra, but it's support like a regular cup bra.

two sports bras to strap the girls down....however after a while that was just 8-much.

I know that I NEED to get one. Cause the girls were STILL bouncin' with the two sb's on.

or so I've heard

Its the one that she has on her favorite things list but I cant remember what they are called

Deoderant or powder or oil or lotion...

what keeps your chest crack and underbreast area from the sweatsmell...

oils. I find them pleasant and refreshing.
powder got messy.
~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!
I am the Black Gold of the Sun...and i love things........Im gonna make you love me

thas my WHOLE body right there...

heard they comin out with the body butter for it..

i'ma be a greasy orangy smellin belle u hear me?

and dries into a powder...i got it a few years ago, and it's the best thing since sliced bread. no warm milk underteat smell :)

i used to put that secret clear under my breasts

and yea

i usedta do the Clear Lady Speedstick Gel up under there...

til it burned one day...

been oilin under there errsince...

and here's another one on this site for $11.50. I use the one with aloe from Huggies

http://www.bodytimeproducts.com/chinrainliqp.html

girl...i'ma try this...

I've using Shower To shower or Oil Of Olay clearstick...

Why is it, ladies, that you always find someone great at the worst time?

It sucks because I've stumbled across something that feels comfortable and nice and warmfuzzy good just as I've decided to go back to school and move out of state and all that jazz.

Now, i've made the mistake of changing my plans on account of some man before and it goes down as the single most horrible decision i've ever made in my entire life. I don't plan on doing that again. So to go or not to go is not the issue. I'd rather err on the side of missing out on a good thing than to make the 2nd most horrible mistake ever.

Still, it always happens this way. I've been single for like over 2 yrs. Never met anyone really worth thinking about. Now, i'm one foot out the door and boom, warmfuzzies.

Sucks ladies.

it normally is..

what are you going to do? can you do the distance thing?


!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!
I am the Black Gold of the Sun...and i love things........Im gonna make you love me

i'm purposefully trying to keep a certain amount of distance while at the same time, still hang out with him before I go.

I don't have any illusions that a long distance thing would work out.

So i'm just gonna take the L on this one.

wow, this is going around...i'm in a similar situation except the distance isn't so bad and he's moving to my home town *schedules trips home this semester*

screw up once..shame
screw up twice...blame...


do u...

if it's meant....it'll stand...

funny i was just explaining this to a friend....i gave up a lot for him and i promised myself i wont do it again so im VERY careful about dating...but as they say it always happens when u least expect it

i say go and leave but try to make it work and see what happens...but honestly i think its a test to see if you will make the same mistake again...will this be the story of your life?

nobody has the answer to this one
just do what feels best and when you meet someone you click with HOPE things work out...
? i guess...

I feel kinda sorta the same way now.
Things popping off w/ someone who's just wonderful
but I still got some demons from the last relationshit that I have to shake before I can give him everything that we both deserve to build our situation up.

coming into fruition....i mean i'm crestfallen over this, and just saddened. however i have to resign myself to the fact...although things were cool, and i think he's such a good person and a good fit for me.....it's some force that is just preventing things from coming into fruition, and i'm sad because i keep using him as a meterstick for potential others.


it's like....:(, he doesn't make me smile like ol' dude....he's not as thoughful as ol' dude.

it's really getting to me and i just wanna cry. :(

REAL TALK

its always the little things, like
asking for help if i need it
or trusting him to do something as well as
i would.

i simply have always enjoyed being 'equal' with men
in ways that not all men appreciate.
from sports to lifting to soldiering, i was always
>< there. my boys/fellow soldiers loved it.

but it dosent work well in relationships.
men dont generally feel 'needed' around me.

i dont know if i should 'tone down' for the sake of
feelings or just do me and accept that the majority
of men may not appreciate it.

i only really seem to connect with type A men that
get that i'm type A as well. and that me being strong
doesnt detract from them.


http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

I've tried to tone down myself, and its really hard.
!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!
I am the Black Gold of the Sun...and i love things........Im gonna make you love me

I have issues with that. I'm not going to change my being to accomodate anybody. Granted, when involved with someone there is a certain level of compromise to be given on both sides of the spectrum.

But I can't stop being me just to make someone feel comfortable in their own skin. In my opinion, thats more of a self assureness issue which requires change internally from the person themselves and pretending be someone i'm not won't change it.

yes, you're right. thats exactly what it is.
and i know that no relationship i entered into like that would last because i'm simply not capable of maintaining it or respecting any man that required it of me.

it just seems impossible to find someone that can deal
with the contradictions that are me.







http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

I always knew, growing up, that I wouldn't make my mark as being the prettiest or the richest or best athelete. I would be the smartest. It's my *thing*. I know shit.
So I've had the hardest time in relationships/interactions with men because more often than not, i'm smarter than them. I've found they don't really like that. So I struggle with being myself and celebrating what I know (without being a knowitall) and "dumbing down" a little bit to make things smoother.
Sucks that we even have to think about it and can't just be ourselves 24/7

or whatever that means.
i can hang with the fellas just as i can hang with
the girls.
and some guys i've dated hate it.
i'll sit and watch football with you
or play video games or drink some beer with your boys.

gender rolls don't really settle well with me, but i find
guys i date don't appreciate that.
they want me cooking and either hanging out with girls
or just 'him'.

i dunno. seriously i give up for like a year.

they're either intimidated or simply don't wanna step up to the plate. If you gon be the head of my household you betta come wit it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

Wu,

But you know what, fact is, its hard to be head of household if you don't know what it means to be so.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

i've come to a realization.....i know all too well that i don't need a man to feel complete, but I do WANT someone to share my life with....and i've run into the ones that don't understand, i WANT you in my life not out of NEED but out of DESIRE.


plus...i'm willing to accept a "traditional" wife role, if he is willing to accept a "traditional" husband role. you can't expect me to meet a certain standard and you can't meet me there.

example: i dated a man that wanted his wife to stay home and raise a family, i have no problems with people who choose to do that, but realize that due to the cost of living....it will be a stretch to live off a lower income, and he was halfway hearing me on that issue.

amen...

when a man tells you "damn wray i love the fact that you don't need me for shyt" that's the one.

something happen to him, that I'll be ok.

something happen to him, that I'll be ok.

i LOVE for men to be men...

but I love a MAN's man...

somebody who has not always had it all together...
so many of them act like that now...

i like onez who know what to do IF trouble comes...and can stand it...

I'm just in love with security...and feeling covered...

ain't felt that since 02

But because i'm me, most men assume that i dont NEED it.
so i dont get it.

Example: You know how they have those mosh pit songs at the club?
well my best friend is a little german chic, she didnt know what to expect and it was too crowded to move.
dudes start whylin and me being me i post up in front of her, cause i'll be damned if one of these sweaty ass dudes is gonna hurt her. so i'm getting bumped but she is good.
there are guys, even security, helping other women. did they come help us. no.
why? he said it was because i had it under control.
yea i did. i always do. but thats why. cause no man has ever stepped up to help.
i would like, just once, to be able to relax cause i knew a man had my back.
just once.

i have fought off men physically while other men stood by and didnt do shit cause, "i had it".
the fuck

NEWS FLASH! I'M A GIRL!!!


http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

I'm so tired.

I just wanna scream "Yes, I'm capable, but dammit, I'M A GIRL, TOO!"

up to be 'independent' so to speak grown black women.

I can't state statistics or percentages, but a quite deal of us have grown up in single parented homes reared by women. A lot of us have had absentee or non involved fathers. So we grow up in an environment where we not only watch and learn, we're taught to not have to rely on men for anything because there's no guarantee that's he's going to stick around rear his children let along be around for you.

So based on our mother's experience and making do and based on some of our own experience with unreliable fathers. We adjust and just be.

That's why I find it difficult to understand the angst many black men have towards black women. If these statistics are true, if past okp conversation is true, many of them have grown up just as fatherless. So, in that respect, they don't know what its like to be men in the midst of strength because someof them fled it. Not all, but some.

So don't take this difficulty as something to be ashamed off. In fact, there is nothing wrong with you. But rather something wrong with the guys who collapse in their manhood within your presence. I wouldn't say that was a man to begin with. I tend to make distinctions between being a male and being a man.

A man would appreciate knowing that his woman would be ok even if he wasn't available immediately for assistance.

Not needing doesn't constitute not wanting.

Wanting doesn't constitute neediness.

the interesting thing with me (not that i'm that unique) is that i was the tallest, strongest one in a family of all females. so in alot of ways i was the designated 'male'.
if sometnig needed reachin, lifting, moving, fixing, putting together it was my lane.
its been that way since i was born.
nobody ever asked me if thats how i wanted to be 24/7. its just what became expected of me by everyone. even me.

it's hard to relinquish an identity i've had my whole life. i dont really want to. its a big part of me, but its not all of me, and i'd like the men in my life to understand that.



http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

i love doing shit for myself
even fixing things

I love fixing things. Working with my hands using a drill.

I expect my man to be able to do the same.
I want to rennovate my home. I'd like to have my man right along side me helping a sista out not asking "Uh how do I turn this on."

i can't stand a man that isn't mechanically inclined. if i have the ability to learn how to install my own kitchen faucet....install my own showerhead and i can change a tire. It ain't that hard....if you can read directions and have the right tools...you can do it.


being handy is DEFINATELY something that i look for in a man.

i've had men flat out tell me that i rob them of the opportunity to be "the man in the house". I don't know how to be any different. Does anyone else?

he will do it as well or in a timely manner like me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
www.myspace.com/tobi75

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Everybody wants to let go. But somebody's gotta hold on." --Kierra K

!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!
I am the Black Gold of the Sun...and i love things........Im gonna make you love me

and Sarah Jess was sayin how she just needed to feel the "weight" of a man on her body. I ain't neva really identified with her so much in my life. There's something about a man's weight (being on my back in particular) that'll put me right to sleep.

music comforts me...slow jams or slow jazz.
food comforts me...anything cheesy.
laughter comforts me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

and watch every episode of every season together!?
i saw that and thought... how nice

I was watching it, and thinking... damn, she just summed it up for me.

it's not about the member, or even the sensation. I need to feel the weight of a man...hot breath...noises (not the noise of a battery)...sweat. I need a MAN!

When I'm hurting, I find something that sounds good and listen to it til I wanna listen to another album or song ad nauseum.

I try not to eat when I'm depressed because I don't wanna associate food with comfort.

------------------------------
I'm so famous.(c) Joi
www.myspace.com/heavenleiblumoon

in seeing my children grow, my friends getting to their goals,
music...and watching a good movie
!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!
I am the Black Gold of the Sun...and i love things........Im gonna make you love me

fairytale's are tales.

real love takes dedication. it can be successful between two people who have no other thing in common except for attraction, if it is successful depends on their equal dedication.

i've learned that you do not get any thing in life unless you work for it. atleast that's how my life has been, honestly there hasn't been anything that i have set my mind to that i didn't get.

there have been plenty of things that i have gotten though that i didn't ask for.

as far as relationships go- i definitely don't have the answer no one does or ever will.

you won't know til the end if you've wasted your time. for me giving myself a time limit helped. this time instead of spending a year- i only spend six months and acually i'm changing that to three months.

not letting my self down is key. if i say three months then i'm out unless it's going good.

settling for less or trying to find a mate that meets your standards is all hogwash to me- give me a bum who will love me unconditionally and i'll take him- cus in the end i believe in love- and true love will make my bum clean up and do whatever he can to make us work.

often times we get caught up looking for our standards- and then you just end up with someone that meets all the criterias except for the ones that really matter- like compassion, and understanding.

i want to be loved the way i love others. everyone does. guess what- if you truly love yourself then you already have tht love for yourself and when you give it to others they have no choice but to give it back to you. pure love that is. i know it- i've seen it and felt it.

my life won't have a fairytale ending. in death i will be alone.(all one)

but on my death bed it will be a matter of pride and validation for me to say that i loved honestly, purely and fiercely regardless of the
end result i will kno wmy life's worth by the fact that i had love.

i know it's a little strong woman minded- what can i say I AM a strong woman.

that doesn't say- that i don't enjoy all the pettiness of life- the drama, the tears, oh what emotional and physical abuse i have endured in my short dating life- what ways i have exploited my pussy and have been exploited...that is a tale for that ass...

out of it all though i still emerge like a phoenix rising- stronger and shinier than before-


Now- my situation is a little scary- i'm dealing with a man- a young man who has yet found his niche in life- however the resonance the communication between us is so deep- i've sworn to him that i will not ever be with an other man- and i actually believe it this time(hee hee)

am i settling? i don't think so.

do i deserve more or less? i think i don't deserve him. he's still an innocent.

do i deserve him? OH YES I DO!

will we be together forever? Only time will tell.

Do i care? sometimes yes and sometimes no. today is the moment and in the long run we will all be dead.

i'm sure this might be a bit confusing- i'll probably just respond to your posts- or just ask me questions if you're really curious.

Fairytales though- no.

Real life- you've got to work at.

I believed in them for a long time, until I realized all the moments were perfect setups were disappointments, and the little moments that I carry with me were always sporadic and unsuspected.

It's a nice thought, but real life is nothing like literature and cinema makes it out to be. Unfortunately. I wouldn't mind a guy running through the rain to tell me he can't go another day without making me his, lol. :-)

no matter what- don't fuck itup by thinking you don't deserve it.

I really hope I don't mess it up.

If it's this difficult to find just a nice guy at 21, who knows how much harder it will be and how much more cynical I'll be by the time one comes along.

am I the only one who hesitates?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

i walk around with the Summer Eve's wipe, just in case.
haha

if that is the cookie you're referring to.

in my desk @ work, in almost all my purses, in my overnight bag...
gotta be prepared.

ionknow WHY..but whenEVER i go to the baffroom...i don't care WHEN it is..i make SHO i leave outta there READY for yum yum mode...

i'm sayin

i could be on the way to church
at work
at a cookout at grandmama nem's
choir rehearsal..

don't care where...

just always in that mentality..

i aint missin out on head behind some silly shit.

http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

but if I'm at home, I always jump in the shower if company's coming.
------------------------------
I'm so famous.(c) Joi
www.myspace.com/heavenleiblumoon

that's supposed to be a compliment?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

i mean sure...it's nice to be attractive to someone, but essentially i want someone that i can grow with and relate to....i just think for me it would be too much of a issue if i dated someone more than 8 years older than me.


i tried it in college, but it was for all the wrong reasons. i'm not feeling it now.

I may not carry myself like some video chick but cot dammit that don't mean I'm tryin to get at pension plans either! No Anna Nicole-o
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

because...i did the "right" things, finished school...have a decent career, no felonies...no man is beating on me now and i can wake up and go to bed with myself and be alright.

i want to attract a guy that i can grow with and not feel like i have to stifle my development so he can play "catch-up" (and i'm not even talking about income...i'm talking about just living life and experiencing things)...it's like the ones that i can see myself growing with, they are on something else....either they are married to their career, married to chasing women or married to their ego.

the ones that are attracted to me are generally older (10-15 years older), their children are like my age...they are hitting their stride in the career or trying to retire. they figure that i'm pretty together based on conversation, however i'm still a 20-something year old woman that likes 20-something year old stuff....i mean i still watch cartoons, i have hello kitty panties on today (TMI!)...but you get what i'm saying.

yes, i think i'm mature....but i'm still pretty young also.

and let's not get on married men cuz I OWN that topic. OWN, the fock, IT.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

Anything past that, and well, you my damn daddy's age, and that's just gross.

Last older guy I dated was Mensa--he was 40.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

their hay boo on..its not cute

stay in your age group, pops!

I think I'm still young enough to be creeped out by this, but it's been the case since I was about 15. I always wondered what it was that made older (especially MUCH older) men think it was okay to approach young girls the way some of them do. This does odd things to the teenage psyche.

been there done that. the oldest that i'll go up is 10 years.

though i try not to put limits on anything.

it would have to be the right old man though...hehe

"You the prettiest little thing in here. Sittin' here all quiet. You gone have to come back and see me." I could just hear the change jingling in his pocket.

They're just fresh old men who think they still "got game," spitting old lines like the Chi-Lites are playing in the background or something.

I've never had a disrespectful one though.

the gap is closing like a muhfucka.
------------------------------
I'm so famous.(c) Joi
www.myspace.com/heavenleiblumoon

yay or nay?

how many break ups do you have to go through before you say "no more"

plus, its only prolonging the inevitable.

i'll probably stay thru a few break ups...

the less amount of years atleast 3.

I think that has more to do with me not wanting to give up on something so quickly.

That's cus i'm used to people giving up on me or not giving me a chance at all- so i like to give others the chance that i'm not always given.

before we realized maybe we're just not meant to be.

for me there is a point though where i say no more.

there is a ppoint of no return. maybe he put his hands on me- maybe he cheated- maybe he just ignored me-

i can't ever call it- but it's like i am being pushed and pushed and pushed till finally i cross the line and when i do- i do not ever go back the way i came.

but before that happens- my last relationship i think we broke up every month. i knew i didn't want to be there...but every time he came back to me looking for another chance i wd give it to him- till one day he actually violated me physically and that's when i decided it was over.

i cdn't look past that. i mean and he cheated on me- before it's been that he ignored me and that was like a two year relationship...

i mean for me it's the line that i hvae to be pushed over- once there i'm out...sayonara!

(c) Reverend X?

I'm not boolsh*ttin with you anymore. You can't make up ya mind about what you wanna do, step...cuz I know what I want.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

haha you're funny

I watched my mother and stepfather break up countless times over 15 years only to get it somewhat "right" the last 3 years of my stepdad's life. I guess if the chemistry and the bond is that real, humans being will be human beings and they might fail the first time but that doesn't mean that they shouldn't try again if that's what both parties truly and equally want.

With that being said, I've done the breakup to makeup thing 123456789 times and if it goes past breakup #1 11 times outta 10 it just ain't worth it at least in my experience.

its not even by choice.
when i'm done i'm just done.


http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

depends on what caused/keeps causing the breakup



www.vaynmag.com
www.myspace.com/trinapanther

"I'm the best person to discuss me with"- Furonda (ANTM)

This is just my interpretation of the situation- Andre 3000

gonna have to say the nae-no my damie
been there done that I'll never do it again.

There is always a reason for a break up. If that reason cannot be resolved (inmost cases it can't be) then move on make a clean break and keep it moving.

im not going to rant about how women gossip get jealous blah blah, thats just a cop, imo, and is a dead end as far as dialogue goes.

i need female friends. i dont know what quite goes wrong each time. it usually comes down to me not trusting them. i dont trust ppl in general, but i think i'm unconsciously more pessimestic coming into relationships with females.

a lot of the time its due to communication. oddly enough, i feel more comfortable saying whats on my mind to men versus females. im not quite sure why. anyway, i like having my own time, and by that i mean i like to escape from everything once in a while and seclude myself from everything (ght be an only child thing), and women take this the wrong way. i know im part of the problem, since i give up on those friendships. i also think, I tend to look for that 'ride of die' type friend, that honestly is rare, if even exists (i.e. sex and the city). so maybe im setting myself up.

im starting to rant, and i know this is a heavy topic, but where do I begin in establishing healthy relationships and where do we go wrong?

cuz..i really dont' have no sista circle..

most of my "lady" love is within my family...like mama...aunts..cuzzins...

i got like 7 girlfriends but we ain't tight tight..

MY thing is...

i don't care...

like really


i love love...and friendship any in any gender he or she comes in


yet..i get "u don't love the sisters"

it's not that


just don't hang around many of them...


*shrugs shoulders*

>most of my "lady" love is within my family...like >mama...aunts..cuzzins...

same here, i have a few, maybe 2, 3 girls that i could talk to, but i dont care for them. i SAY i dont care if i dont have gf's, but i think i do. i think its a problem that ive never had a healthy long lasting friendship with a woman that wasnt a relative.

then you won't have the "sista circle". Friendships with women, just like any relationships take maintenance and care. They have to be cultivated, they don't appear out of thin air.

i trust women a lot more.

but i see how you feel. for seven years my best friend and i were in and out of each other's lives. if she hurt my feelings, instead of talking to her, i would just disappear.

same for her.

it wasn't until maybe two or three years ago we realized we are grown ass women and we should know how to share how we feel in a respectful manner. i don't think you should assume that women are any different than men.

be open and honest with your female friends. just as you would with a guy, be open with a female.

i think once you get over your assumptions that women are jealous and gossipy then you'll be a lot better off, because just off of this site alone more okp men would rather gossip with me than women.

>i think once you get over your assumptions that women are jealous and >gossipy then you'll be a lot better off, because just off of this site >alone more okp men would rather gossip with me than women.

i wanted to pointed out that THAT wasnt my assumption, men do gossip just as much as women, if not more. i have a trust problem in general. maybe i havent met the right women yet, maybe i expect too much, maybe its a little bit of both plus some.

shrug

Hi my name is Arielle-

I am a loner. Come join me in my circle of friends...i'm the only one here right now...but I'm always looking for more...

Ask ladyboss and uhm scrollie- I'm cool peeps yo!

Gimme a chance- let's talk!

that was such a low effort- but no i need some women in my life- just for that sounding board...

i love all kinds of women too- prissy, bitchy gully...send me your weak and your strong...

ok that was abit much...but no for real...i'm tired of being the outkast okpette. i cdn't even go to the daag on spa thing...

lets hang

no doubt i'm going here on sunday the 21st- http://www.mienyu.com/

we're looking for something to get into on the 20th tho.

that's sad, you didn't go to the spa thingie :(

it's tough because it's not that many women down here, and the few that i've met we are all so busy and wrapped up in our own lives....we don't make conscious efforts to hang out, which is sucky.


i'm always looking for new sisterfriends, especially level-headed, fun-loving people. i know i've pestered you enough via inbox :)

sorry...but i'm all all the way in ATL though, but i've been meaning to make my way out west one day....i have a friend in Altadena, CA that I haven't seen in 7 years :(

if it's any consolation....i make a mean carrot cake and red velvet cake....oh yeah, i make key lime pie too.

yeah that kinda sucked...but i may be moving back to tha A next year too...


so no doubt thanx for joining the circle...i've got the warm fuzzies...

are you coming to the re?


http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

since you are moving to ATL.....you just ain't know that yet.

I was gonna bribe you with cake and pasta with my homemade alfredo sauce.

and we were gonna play with my makeup, because it's only but so much i can practice on my face....i wanna make up other people's faces :)

i'd rather let you bribe me, lol.
cake, pasta AND homemade alfredo sauce?
imma play hard to get. :-)

see you soon, lady!

http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

i don't wanna hear it!....and don't think i wouldn't be trying to make your face up and twist your locks. i told myself that when i get to my goal size and make some other improvements in my life....i'm either going to lock again or cut my hair short as like a rebirth kinda thing.


i've been weaving to achieve because i'm bored and can't think of hairstyles to do.

I've come to the conclusion that fokes who say to me (not saying you've said this) "Tasha, you don't have a cell phone so it's blah blah blah" are just bullshitting on the "I really wanna hang out w/ you" tip. Because, hell, they don't call the number they DO have for a nigga.

Nobody ever calls me. All my business correspondence is done through email, so not even my best client calls me. I called her yesterday to tell her I was running a li'l late on the delivery of the audio, and that was the last phone convo I had. That was yesterday.

This phone has not rung ONCE today, and I made money sitting right here.

i'm going to Chicago for my dad's birthday this weekend....i'm flying out Thursday night, and i'll be back Sunday, but i'm turning around and heading down to Warner-Robins, GA Monday @ 6am and will be there until Thursday night....so I really will be out of the loop until May 12th


are you going to see Darien Brockington & Tanya Morgan?....if so i'll definately see you there.

Winky Dinky Dog closes at 11, but it all depends on when the last table decides they wanna go the fuck home.

I'ma try to get outta there at a decent hour. I'm aight w/ missing Darien (sorry Monty--you know I luh yo fine ass), but I MUST see TM.

i wouldn't be doing my duty as an OKP and an Aggie if i didn't see TM though. Either way, i'm gonna get my pitiful ass out the house.

ya'll know i'm tryna buy a house.

I ain't know you was FROM here!

Yeah, I need to look into some real estate, seriously. I just ain't sure where I'ma be at, though.

http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

when i get that 50k in da bank.

are you gonna stay in the profession or do something different once you get to the A?

http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

some other side hustles-
which i will not be divulging at this time.

nice to meet you wray wray???

what do i call you homie?

lisa, sis.
howz u?

your in cali, right?


http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

I'm Katrina

nice 2 meet ya
:-)

www.vaynmag.com
www.myspace.com/trinapanther

"I'm the best person to discuss me with"- Furonda (ANTM)

This is just my interpretation of the situation- Andre 3000

how you be?

Nice to meet you don't be a stranger now- i'm the resident okp carebear and miss cleo...ha ha.

nawl for real tho- i'm cool peeps kinda crazy tho...but i think you can hang huh?!
yuh!

i think i might get some more money so i can stay in school

so i'm happy

how are you?

www.vaynmag.com
www.myspace.com/trinapanther

"I'm the best person to discuss me with"- Furonda (ANTM)

This is just my interpretation of the situation- Andre 3000

to maintain platonic friendships with men. it's like the few sisterfriends I have....i know their shortcomings and i know their strengths and i have learned to still love them all the same and in their own special way.

with men...my tolerance is just so limited and i'm quick to say, you know what....i can't rock with you no mo', and that's the end of the friendship, or i have had male friends that stop befriending me when the friendship doesn't turn into the fuckin'ship....i told them there are 3 ships in my life....friendship, relationship and fuckin'ship and you can't ride 2 boats at the same time....and you can't jump back and forth between boats.

i do want some more female friends because my girlfriends are spread out over the US, and it's so funny the ladies I connect so well with on here or who i'd like to befriend live so far away :(

you know...i want a good girlfriend that we can hit the malls occasionally, go to dinner once a week and just hang out and be silly.

and college. Ain't even lookin for new ones but if it happens, so be it. You have to really get on my nerves for me not to maintain "some" kind of friendship with you. Personally, I'd rather take on new guy friends. For some reason it's just...easier.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

Lately I've been thinking that the way I'm wary of trusting my mother completely may have some effect on the way I have friendships with other women. I find that I cut them considerably less slack and probably open myself up to them a lot less than I do with male friends. I'm not even sure how to handle that about myself.

a few years ago, I could've co-signed this..but now, I have some lovely, beautiful sistren that I love wholeheartedly. We laugh together, we cry together, we get on each other's nerves, we support each other, we pray for each other and we are honest. I know how to tell them that I need space. I wasn't always like this. Maybe four years ago, I was a loner (I still have loner tendencies) and I used the excuse that the majority of my friends were on the east coast so I was cool in my place. But I was lonely. When I finally decided to be more outgoing and trusting, I opened myself up to some characters that I cannot see my life without. Some of these characters were in place already. Like my Mom and my sis. I love hanging out with them. I spend the majority of my time with them and I've started to see my Mom as a friend, who is funny as hell, btw. I see where I get my sense of humor from cuz she makes me stop in my tracks sometimes and say "What did you say?"

But aside from my blood family, I have wonderful sisters who are my collected family.

Would love to include others. My heart is big and open. I give good advice. I listen well and I support. So, holla at me. You get back what you put out.

how you be??? where you stay at?

you're already in my OKcircle...we've shared and discussed a lot as is.

I'm doing amazingly well today. How are you?

I'm in Los Angeles...I know you're in San Diego so when you come back up this way, holla at me.

ive always been slightly envious of that "sex and the city" type relationship...

i usually have like 1 homegirl at a time but i would love to do the saturday morning breakfasts, and weekend spa trips wit "my girls"


and if ya dont know...im Jamila yall

Im glad u found wonderful, positive friends to surround yourself with. you are right when you say "you get back what you put out." im just realizing the important of needing the right balance of being open, yet careful.

competition w/ "the sistas" (c) LoveJones
my closest friends (other than fam, of course) are not black. maybe it's just coincidence, i don't know. but w/ them, these non-black friends, i never feel like i'm being judged or competing for anything. it's come as you are, it's all good, we love your spirit, and shit, lol. they're my biggest cheerleaders, next to my mama, and even when i was a part of a sista circle, i never had as much love unconditionally, just raw. maybe friendships get better w/ age *shrug. Maybe we've all been through the ringer w/ that one (or few) frienship and we've learned from it so our capacity to be friends ripens. i don't know.
at my age, friends have come and gone. Which is to be expected. Friendships are just like romantic relationships and i've broken up w/ my fair share of friends over the last two decades...for whatever reason (grew apart, got stabbed in the back, lost touch, etc.) and I know the same can happen w/ my current friends but they're so worth it. they bring so much to my life. I just wish i could find that same bond w/ some sistas, tho (all the sista friends i have are more like associates). at least one that isn't family. i know it's possible.
^what a tangent^ lol

friendships get better with age. I've matured into my ability to BE a friend. I think my needs became different at a certain age and I stopped competing or looking at surface relationships. I let some people go, but at the end of the day, the ones I've kept and the new ones I've added have been worth everything. I couldn't see my life without them. Five or six years ago, I don't think I was in the right place.

a friend and I were pregnant at the same time and as soon as the kids were born, for some odd reason everything became competition to her. At first I thought there were self-esteem issues so I tried to encourage her. But after a while I realized that I may not be able to help her so we grew apart.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
www.myspace.com/tobi75

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Everybody wants to let go. But somebody's gotta hold on." --Kierra K

i usually find a nice small group of friends, then slowly everything just dissolves.

when i was much younger it was over petty bullshit, so i'm not even complaining about that.

but lately... it just seems like it's a trust issue.

a few of 'em have given me reason to be wary but...
sometimes i just think it's me seeing too much into something.

>i usually find a nice small group of friends, then slowly >everything just dissolves. a few of 'em have given me reason to be >wary but...sometimes i just think it's me seeing too much into >something.

same here. i know its not just me meeting bad people or me not trusting them, its got to be a combination of things, u know? and finding the common thread of where things go wrong in each relationship will help.

>when i was much younger it was over petty bullshit, so i'm not even >complaining about that.
u know, i still deal with mainly petty bullshit in college, yes, we are in our early 20s but damn, when does HS really end?

"weak" in the sense that....i get tired of having that girl talk about "how dis nigga doin me wrong, but i love him anyway" type shit...

there is only sooo many times that i can be that supportive girlfriend without sayin "Damn broad i dont wanna hear that shit no more!"

i know we are emotional creatures and all but when i hear women complain and complain without doing anything about the situation...that shit makes me wanna write folks off all together

not saying this is a good thing (cuz ive done this a few times), but something about that weak energy turns me the fuck off

so most of my friends end up being men....but sometimes i do miss the bra and panty convos...

I think it has something to do with my mother. Though I love her...umm...lets just say I think she taught me to be wary of women. I have female friends but it is very difficult to trust them. I am also very guarded and I think some women take that the wrong way. They look at it as being aloof.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
www.myspace.com/tobi75

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."--Ralph Waldo Emerson

well, not MADE me, but she is the same way, so i think ive picked that up from her, and she doesnt really have much friends either, so we're codependent on each other as well :=/ but thats another story.
im guarded too, and many of the problems ive had between friends have stemmed from my miscommunication too, but they usually take it for "i dont wanna be their friend anymore" or "im shady," lol...far from it. do you do better with guy friends?

I won't say that I am better with guys but in my house it was always the dudes that were the calm ones and the women were more dramatic. However, I am laid back and calm so I related more to my father and brother. That led me to relating more to guys than girls. Now as I have gotten older (and I'm married) I try to cultivate more relationships with women. But just like you I've been misunderstood. Hit me up if you need to talk about it. Are you on MSN Instant Messenger or Google Talk?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
www.myspace.com/tobi75

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Everybody wants to let go. But somebody's gotta hold on." --Kierra K

the current prospect has a lil one...Im not in the mood for baby mama drama

u just have to decide if that is the route u want to take

takes a lot of "extra" effort.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

But first, you have to go into with an open mind and a realization that he will have to see his child's mother at times.

Second, it takes patience because if he's spending time with his child like he's supposed to, there are goign to be times where he just doesn't have as much time to spend with you.

Third, if its not your thing don't let anyone guilt you into getting involved in an arena of no interest to you. Its ok when a man says he doesn't want to date a woman with children, but somehow this is misconstrued with a woman echoes the same sentiments. She's often beat over the head with the 'you're missing out on a good man' antics.

but i think that's cuz i'm younger...i simply don't want a man who has a child right now.

but as of lately it seems that it's almost impossible.

i don't think i'm ready to step in and be that step-mother yet.

even if you don't marry the guy, if you're going to get into a relationship with him, the child is going to play a pretty big part in that.

braids are the summer thang for me...

now that i've gotten all of them done...
i can't choose...

micros...loved them IN..but HATED taking them out

Kinkys...i liked them..but liked the micros better

NO singles...

cornrows....ehhh..cool...i think i like the LIL LIL ones tho...

twists...they aiiight...they itch early doe...



baffled

I used to get them alot when I lived back East..now I get them ocassionally...12 hours is too damn long to to be in that chair, but I love how they look when theyre fresh..but after about 3 weeks..that new growth be comin on strong lol..I too HATE takin them out

yeah i used to love them when i didnt have locs

and when I get tired of doing my own hair.
usually micros.
but when I get them, that's when I see all the chicks with the naturals and i want MY hair to be out too!
i also feel like i blend in too much with them in and i get too paranoid about the new growth and lookin crazy.

but i DO NOT want to go to an african braiding place (they pull too tight) and don't want to end up like brandy - all bald at the front.

also, i'm toying with the idea of getting tracks sewn in... any suggestions?

niggas be like 17 n shit tryin to come with...thats not cute either

I don't know whether it's good or bad.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

Try young ones at church. There was a whole row behind my pew waving.

a 24 year old got me twisted right about now...

and i turn 30 this year


thas the age of my baby brother

WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY off the meter for Tonya


i'm confused as hell


but his game is tight...EVERY BIT of it....


*flashback

There's a 24 year old that swears we're friends. I friend of mine has a 24 year old trying to ease in.

hahaha

but 21 and up i'm okay with.

hehe

*hides under desk*

lol

try working 3 blocks from a high school.
UGH, just fuckin UGH.
but they just luh the shit out of me for whatever reason.

LOL

just last week some boy told me he just turned 18 2 weeks ago. I keep hoping I hit a turning point when no young boys try to holla.

they say i look younger than what i am but once they know, they don't care anyway. I'm like, we can't even go out for drinks similac breath

they be pretty young
w/ big balls trynna holla at me, lol

it's getting harder and harder to keep "esther, the child molester" in check, but i must. i don't need the headache

i pay it no mind

I KNOW I'm not!

she had TWINS without giving birth, so she kept her
shape and still has offsprings and a career.
has a big dick stud of a husband.
AND she's got a cotdamn nanny for them kids.

cotdamn she's my idol, yo.

I don't have baby the first, but I'd like to do it natch, if at all possible.

Angela had a surrogate, but them twins is hers and Courtney's biologically. They took her egg and his sperm and made it happen in somebody else womb.

her hubby needs more lines in that fuckin show.

u right...doe

i dare not be mad

i've never had that feeling before, for i enjoyed the shit out of being the all knowing first born of the movement. however, once in a while i wish for an older sister who could guide me a little.

It's bad enough that I'm going through so many things later in life (dating, losing virginity, etc.)...sometimes I wish had an older sister to be there, dispense advice, etc...

Friends are great but family is better.

i mean i have like 7 aunts

and one cousin that's about 5 years older than me, but it's not the same.

sometimes i really dont' like being the oldest...esp. now since i'm about to graduate and everybody's waiting to see how i'll fare in the real world

too much guinea pig type ish

-okayplayer loryn, a cali export

aim: Tiye215

alright bitches, i'm on myspace:
www.myspace.com/lcwzeta

ignorantart.blogspot.com

"you're never going to get anywhere without being a strategic bitch."-- professor jennifer james, GWU

see..when it gets hot...i bleed more...
one time...i was havin 8 day periods...

thought i was gon dry up and die...

not to mention i'm amemic...

this ain't started yet in 06...but in preparation...is there a remedy?

Drink you 2 tablespoons in a 8 oz glass of water.

That'll slow it on up.

Worked for me.

I was on a vinegar regimen like, daily. I used to suffer from 10 day stretches when my period decided it wanted to show up (I have PCOS). That vinegar cut them visits down to like, 5 days. I was still in the bathroom changing equipment every 2 hours and shit, but it shortened the duration and heaviness.

yo and whas PCOS...


we needta build forreal...


u boutta make me a bedda woman...


*apple cider Vinegar on shoppin list
*Check!*

this is wonderful for high blood pressure too...

and probably Bskin, too, if she down wit it.

Our room gon' be the bomb--all 5 of our fine asses in there together? WHAT?!?!? lol

But yeah, girl, I'll Be There (c) J5

we definitely have to politic.

And I have the same disease as mylife, only hers is much more severe than mine. Then again, she's actually taking stuff to make hers better--I'm just living w/ my shit.

PCOS is polycystic ovarian syndrome. Irregular periods, crazy big ass abdomen, pain in the ovary area and shit--it's got a grillion different symptoms. Weight difficulty is the one I struggle with. We have no clue if I'll be able to have babies.

been sayin nat for a minit

i got a room for sat and sunday night all by my lonesome...

we needsta share...

*bskin on speed dial...


:)

yea best believe...i'm comin thu to yawlz room...

I'm convinced. I'm coming to NYC on the 24th, and I'ma sleep that day and Thursday, but once it's Friday, I'm awake for the duration of the weekend, Ma.

i just saw your post today.
i dont think the other ladies would care and i'd love to have you if you wanna come. i still havent heard back from Bskin yet.
for some reason this is starting to feel like a sleepover!!

lets have a party!!!


http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

I'm cool with it if they all are. SPLIT THAT BILL! Drew was fuckin around too long and got left out, yo, lol.

What we doing, 3 to a bed? I'll bring my air mattress in my suitcase, seriously. I'ma buy me a suitcase when I get up there anyway for all the stuff I plan on buying.

that was really the idea at first...

but now...

i done changed my mind


breezeboogie was my roomie last year...and that shit worked out GREAT


so whomever dont' mind candles and incense.....

let's do it..

Since you already got a room--I ain't know you already had a room.

.....

however, i know i'm going to have to make some moves with this money.

i'm almost tempted to find a cheap fare from ATL and hit it....but i know i'll want to shop and everything :(.

i even took off that Friday too :(

ticket for the same price I paid 2 months ago when I bought mine.

$193 + tax and fees. Ended up being like, $235.

I WILL be shopping, doe.

Cause you know women be shopping.

i'm gonna have to really sell some baskets and etc. for mother's day to get my RE money together.


$235 ain't bad....i'll have to do it after the 12th though.

If you reading this again. . . I have PCOS also but I have regular periods (everyt 28 days) but I have the huge belly and extreme hirsuitism. Only reason why I know I have is because I havent been able to get pg well I have but I miscarried four times. (which is another post in itself).

Its crazy when u are married and 30 and everyone keeps asking when yall gonna have some babies. You explain the issue to them and then they have all types of remedies. DONT YOU THINK WE TRIED EVERYTHING IN THE DAMN BOOK
***************************************
<----who I love

i've never heard of the condition...

but i pray God touches your womb...with fruitfulness

my heart aches when i see ladies who wanna be mamas and for health reasons...are stifled...

is there a CURE versus a remedy? or is it an ongoin condition?

"is there a CURE versus a remedy? or is it an ongoin condition?

There is no cure because its hormonal. It can be controlled through diet, exercise and medication and of course we are doing all that. I will deal with PCOS for the rest of my life and if I do have a daughter I will probably pass it on to her. I think about that sometimes too.

I think about women who dont want children and STAY getting pregnant.
I think the universe is laughing at me.

***************************************
<----who I love

tonic....that helped me also.

my periods used to be for 12 days, every 4 months....then they went to 8 days every other months, once i turned 23...they regulated themselves to every month for 6 days. I was a late bloomer though, i didn't get my period until I was 16, and ironically I got pregnant 7 months later.

now my period is 3-4 days every 29 days, this is from being on NuvaRing and reducing my meat intake also.

Where can I get it?

My period shows up when it wants to, seriously. I don't even keep track of it no mo. This disease is some shit.

I started at about the average time--it was my 13th summer that my period showed up, the summer between 7th and 8th grade. But the only time I've been regular every month was when I was on the pill.

I'ma start this NuvaRing I have sitting here as soon as Aint Flo leave, too.

http://www.anyotc.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=6105

i have had no complaints with the NuvaRing, it causes no discomfort during sex....i had one partner that didn't feel it, and the other one said yeah...but it wasn't an issue or anything.

my cramps are reduced...and since ovarian and uterine cancer run in my family (my mother, grandmother, 3 aunts and my older sister), i am all for hormone contraceptives.

http://www.anyotc.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=6105

i have had no complaints with the NuvaRing, it causes no discomfort during sex....i had one partner that didn't feel it, and the other one said yeah...but it wasn't an issue or anything.

my cramps are reduced...and since ovarian and uterine cancer run in my family (my mother, grandmother, 3 aunts and my older sister), i am all for hormone contraceptives.

I have this same issue. I will be using the apple cider vinegar

unconditionally with all my imperfections, how can i love someone else and maximize that feeling?

are you talking love or lust?

and way off...


nothin is wrong with companionship...

God himself said
"it is not good for man to be alone" so he made us...


i'm simply talkin about bowlin and watchin sportscenter....


selah...

but your reference to auset's post that i didn't read but seemed to be abt love based on you description made me think you was talking abt something a lil more than just serving peanuts on superbowl sunday to a bunch of homeboys.

but oh tay

>If i can't love myself unconditionally with all my imperfections, how can i love
>someone else and maximize that feeling?

no one is downplaying the importance of self love
but I think what some have said is
'why can't I say I want companionship
without someone assuming it's because I feel incomplete & telling me to 'just love myself'?'
over and over the ladies below say they do love themselves
& feel complete
but that they would still like some companionship




...and in whatever I say, I hear you.

miss me wit that sh*t. It ain't just the young ones either.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

Prettier than me, lipglossed and pomaded and shit.

Hell nawl.

ewww

http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

but i do like clean-cut guys.....i was in my phase where if he had facial hair like Cody Chestnutt, I was all about it.

but i will tell you that i love that goatee....it's something that just brings out the ravenous part of me (that...and my sexlife is so paltry), but whoooo wee....there is this nice young man @ the 24 hr. post office near me.....i wanted to jump across the counter and have my way with him. The bols in ATL are doin' it with the goatee though, like them David Banner ones and dude from Tha Backwudz....oh yeah can't forget Ray Cash.

alas....i just got my money order and went home to my drawer of toys :(

it must be the midwest in me....but i am a sucker for them 360 degree brush waves though...glistening and shining and etc.

tryina smoothe out 10 hairs down his chest n shit

lol

esp. the conceited ones

i think it's cuz i'm from LA and the pretty boy thing was so common there...i'm just not attracted to that. i used to be, but that was when i was still a teenager.

-okayplayer loryn, a cali export

aim: Tiye215

alright bitches, i'm on myspace:
www.myspace.com/lcwzeta

ignorantart.blogspot.com

"you're never going to get anywhere without being a strategic bitch."-- professor jennifer james, GWU

stop it fam. they don't appreciate it so stop puttin yaself out there. you will get burnt.

you're not driving my car no mo
I ain't goin 1/2 on ya plane ticket
and I ain't bakin you SHAT.

I've said too much.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

I can't do it no mo.

I'm always taking care of mofos, but when it's my turn, fokes is ghost. And that's platonic fokes I'm tombout. We ain't even gon' get stared on the romantic shit.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

they're your equal not your kid

feel me?
it's cool to treat them well, but don't take of mofos

on the ground so the tree won't grow back....and i'ma have a coffee table made out that tree :)

but it's like....it's in my nature to be compassionate and giving when i'm in a good mood.

my niceness has been mistaken for weakness for far too long...

these fokes out here is some takers.

It's like, really, who do I have to be to get some RECIPROCITY in this bitch?

>It's like, really, who do I have to be to get some RECIPROCITY
>in this bitch?




...and in whatever I say, I hear you.

>I ain't goin 1/2 on ya plane ticket
>and I ain't bakin you SHAT.

i could handle the first
the second is a deal breaker, booboo

NO i ain't comin to see YOU...get in yo car and drive nigga
NO i takin YOU out...
NO i ain't doin SHAT else...


u got that right Wu...


No has been the preface to alotta TonyaSentences in 06

I didn't get this for a while. Men will gladly take all you give them and break your heart like it's nothing.

but can't come clean your yard or help you paint or fix a sink...

you know i rolled my neck when i typed that, lol.


http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

and each woman is different. so to say that it is/isn't enough is really only reflective of your personal needs

it seems as if wantin companionship = lack of self love

on some

"If and ONLY when u love yourself..THAS when it'll all come together..until then it shouldn't be time nor space for anything missing in your life"

some chic told me that...


i'm like..

wtf is wrong with me wantin a chill potna to watch the game with...play pool with...etc...


i luhs me some ME..but sometimes i get SICK of me by myself



Congrats on May 6th btw....
best wishez

>
>i luhs me some ME..but sometimes i get SICK of me by myself

haha i tell him this all the time
>
>
>
>Congrats on May 6th btw....
>best wishez

gracias.

I swear this is the most lackeness (figure it out) gene in the male species.

If you know I'm waitin on you and you get distracted/gon be late/have a change of plans...then pick up the dayum phone!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

hanging more than once.

I'll give you ONE TIME.

But nothing beyond that. That's where I get my "you so mean/hard" label, but nah, man. I'm The Shit, and you need to be on the phone if you gon' be late. That's common decency cause somebody else want the time I got you scheduled for.

That post about how Black women don't make eye contact with Black men in corporate (or otherwise) settings stayed in the back of my mind.

But women don't smile or nod back at each other. Or at least, they never smile back at me. I hate how they'll look you up and down and won't even smile or at least nod out of politeness.

it's one of my biggest pet peeves
total disrespect if you ask me
i mean, how are you not gonna respect my TIME?
I could be doing a million other things instead of waiting on YOU.

Oh, and that sorry excuse you got... nah bruh, cuz nowhere in there did i hear that your hand/arm/fingers got broke. So you coulda called/Texted me.

inconsiderate.

and you would think that shit is basic....

*smh* some men i SWEAR

www.vaynmag.com
www.myspace.com/trinapanther

"I'm the best person to discuss me with"- Furonda (ANTM)

This is just my interpretation of the situation- Andre 3000

OFF

quick...

and yet, most of them do it. WHY? Why, I ask? It's not that hard. And truthfully, you telling me that you can't come is not going to piss me off more than you not calling at all to say this one simple fact.

like how can you condone your male friend, brother dogging a girl out?

And say that ish is abt loyalty- f that ish- you need to have loyalty for your sister that he beat down, cheated on or dogged out.

Personally this is one type of woman that breaks my heart.

Like how you gone put your foot in my neck to help that brother off his knees?

Personally if my little brother does some fucked up ish i don't hesitate to put him in check- if you babysit these brothers and make them feel good abt their bad behaviour then you're just as guilty - you might as well have been the one that threw the blow.

No message

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i am very much guilty of this

now note: i will ream his ass out for doin dirty
but if i was friends with him and not ole girl
i'm not jumping on her side automatically just cuz she a female
if thats my boy then thats my boy...wrong or right
it would be the exact same thing other way around
if i knew my homegirl was doggin some dude that i aint know like that or i wasnt cool with
i feel no responsibility or loyalty to him
true my homegirl was wrong
but thats still my girl before anything else

www.vaynmag.com
www.myspace.com/trinapanther

"I'm the best person to discuss me with"- Furonda (ANTM)

This is just my interpretation of the situation- Andre 3000

is dog her like he dogged her.

specially if i know is character i'ma let them do them and keep out of it. yeah i'm a light one into his ass...but i'm not going to degrade, disrespect or catch an attitude with ole girl or ole boy especially if i know that my friend has any chance of being wrong as well.

and if i know that he/she's like loud and wrong then i might just embarass him/her the way he tryna clown ole boy/girl.

that last part might just be me though cus i got a soft heart for the underdog- with having been one for most of my life.

my basic rule fo thumb- let grown folx handle their business. i tell people to do what's in their hearts. i don't offer any judgement or unneccesary personalizations- after all i'm not them i may love them dearly but i still cannot and will not ever be them and as such i can't tell them what to do to be happy.

and uh yeah those sexual cravings while we're at it???

I've learned that staying busy keeps me out of trouble. Doesn't always work - but it helps.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

*sips lemonade*

.

and *I* bats a THOUSAND ERRTIME...

cuz I was side steppin it big time...but yeah, hate that I have to do it too.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

I'm smart and funny and loving and affectionate.

So where is a qualified applicant to knock a ovary loose? Somebody WORTHY of my shit?

|latina212|


be fluid~~~
be water~~~

all i'm going to say is that i should buy stock in Duracell because my toychest has been getting a workout, and i plan on treating myself to a couple more goodies when i get paid.


my sexlife is excellent....too bad it's with myself :(

>my sexlife is excellent....too bad it's with myself :(

and the fake boyfriends aren't really for sex..

Honestly, I'm dealing with this now. Some nights are better than others. There are times when all i want is some arms around me at night and I would be cool.

i kinda had one that used to come thru every once in a while and make out with me, but that shit got a little too frustrating for him...

last time he was over he caught himself saying, "please", and then he apologized and i havent seen or heard from him since...

oh he did call me that one time but that was it...

i'm kinda worried about him...

.

this has been so great....i've been listening to booty-shake music to keep from crying today :)

**blows kissies**

letcho hair down girl...

all is well...

and it will be...

i thought about seeking counseling but it's almost like i feel like my situation isn't jacked up enough to where i need to seek therapy...you know. my problems are so minor compared to other people's.

i'm finally in a city that i love....my job isn't bad, it could be better but i have no REAL complaints. pretty much, i can endure for the time being. my business is starting to take off...which i'm happy about....i'm saving up and hopefully buying a larger place so i can have a whole area to work in instead of a room.

however...it's this lonliness thing that's just really hurting me. i replied kinda explaining the situation under Novembersgift's reply about finding something GOOD (sorry I forgot the number). I think the reason why i'm so perplexed and just hurting about it is because....i see so much good and i know i can't force it because it doesn't help things. i've resigned myself to not making contact until he makes contact first....i guess it hurts because i was really into him.

and i think i'm feeling it more because every potential person i'll meet....i'm going to use him as my meterstick, you know. like...he's alright, but he doesn't have that cute southern accent like him....or dude's alright, but the flow of conversation isn't like with him.

sad thing about it is....we hadn't even slept together, but we've spent a lot of time around each other and he's been a good friend. i understand we all get busy....my life is busy, but i can manage to type a 4 minute e-mail or leave a message or text him.

plus....sometimes i just really think i'm depressed. i can go days without wanting to talk to people, and even the most basic stuff seems like a chore, you know. i love love love makeup....and i used to fix up and do funky stuff with my eye makeup anytime i was in the office.....now, it's just like...blah, whatever.

basically it's a lot of things....frustrated with my body image, frustrated with this situation. it's like all i wanna do is come home from work and lay on the sofa and watch Law & Order. :(

They got on me at work, yo. They was like "Tasha, you the MAC FIEND, nigga! Where is your makeup?!?!?"

And I just be like "Bleh"

I have NOOOO appetite. Be really hongry, but nothing tastes good.

I don't wanna do shit but write and listen to music.

And yeah, the business is getting better for me, too. I should be excited about that but the loneliness is enough to kill a sista.

but it's almost painful to put makeup on....it's like i have no energy. i think this place is sucking the energy out of me....i guess i'm glad i'm going to Chicago for a couple days to rest and relax.


my business is doing alright also...but like you said, the lonliness and the longing for this particular person to put his arms around me again...and seeing his cute little smirk would make my day. i mean it's just really doing a number on me.

i was even thinking about securing a cut buddy for the summer to at least get some stimulation and have the juices flowing....i don't know. it reminds me of what Angela Bassett said in Waiting to Exhale...."i want someone to hold me, even if it is a lie"

:(

that I can't even take the lie anymore. I'm so done I can't even take the lie anymore. I just don't wanna be BOTHERED with the bullshit.

I'ma wait.

But the waiting is what's killing me.

I know it'll be worth the wait in the end, but when is the end? FOCK! Looks like the end gon' be 30 years from now.

then that can be reason enough to go to therapy. I think sometimes black people tend to eschew the therapy 'cuz we're worried about how it might look to other people or we're hesitant to tell some stranger all of are problems. You don't have to be walkin' done the street talkin' to someone who isn't there in order to benefit from therapy. I've been to therapy, I suffer from chronic depression, and it has helped me greatly. If you decide to go it is, however, a lot of work, emotionally, you have to commit yourself to being honest, even when the truth is truly painful.

is that....it's like ok, why should i be depressed....i'm relatively healthy, i have a decent job, i'm in a city that i like...my life may be a little boring and uneventful.....but things could be a whole hell of a lot worse you know.

almost like i feel like i'd be whining if i went....it's like i feel like, damn...your life isn't exactly how you want it, but it ain't fucked up....don't waste folks time, because there are people out there that may really need help.

i guess i'm trying to soldier it on my own...but i don't know, it's just so draining.

"soldiering" fuck that! Black women hesitate about seeking help because it doesn't fit into the whole "I'm a strong black woman" myth. Yes, I said myth. I have plenty of tough women in my family and ancestry and yes they managed without anyone's help sometimes, but that doesn't mean they didn't need it or would not have welcomed some help! If depression is a real issue for you, that's reason enough to seek some help. Tragedy does not have to be afoot for you to seek support.

>is that....it's like ok, why should i be depressed....i'm
>relatively healthy, i have a decent job, i'm in a city that i
>like...my life may be a little boring and uneventful.....but
>things could be a whole hell of a lot worse you know.


as much as we (black folk) wanna ignore it, depression is passed on three fold.
It is situational. But it is also genetic and behavioral.
My sister is effected by depression on a regular basis. Its part of her genetics. So she handles it accordingly.
I always thought I dodged that particular bullet in my fam. nope. Mine can be triggered by life events. Then it can spiral because i was raised by woman who was clinically depressed. the only tools i had for dealing with it are the ones she taught me. they dont work. so i went and got help and learned some new tools.

IT IS A CHEMICAL IMBALANCE. not just the blues. the blues go away. what you described is depression. it is a medical condidtion.

think about what you typed: things aren't going bad, your in a city you love, you have a decent job. So why be depressed? exactly. why would you be depressed if it was something you could regulate or control that easily. its medical. go to the doctor.

we always take care of everyone else. go take care of you.

http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

seriously...I asked this in another post but can we have a pow-wow at the RE? You know, bring whatchu got and show each other what to do cuz I ain't got na'an clue.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

if i was coming....i'd bring my smaller traincase of makeup.

i've been playing with lashes and a clean face with bronzer and a funky lipcolor

or i'll do shockingly bright eyes and a nude lip.

I have 4 brothers, no sisters. I have the dressing thing down pretty much, but I can't apply makeup for shit. I do stuff on myself, but only think it looks right on other people.

Any tips for practicing the application of makeup w/o looking like a damn clown.
I am 26, but on my best day ppl think I am 16. I don't want to look like a girl playing dress-up,ya know?

conservative ass household. My mama's naturally brudaful and she never wore makeup. Not that our brand of Christianity didn't allow her to, but it damn sure didn't allow ME to.

So once I got out there, as cliched as it sounds, gay men taught me how to apply makeup. My best guy friend is a makeup artist, lol. I actually just ended a friendship with a guy who works for MAC, and he taught me some more stuff that my best guy friend didn't get around to teaching me.

My mom still doesn't wear any. She'll throw on some lipstick, but that's it.

Like, is that going to always make me look a little immature no matter how polished my clothes are? I'm in full college student mode now, but I know that I clean up nice. But I've never worn makeup and have no interest in doing so. I think I'll start getting my brows arched though.

But, is never wearing makeup going to come off as a little immature? Unpolished? Unprofessional, even?

I've been one unprofessional, un-pulled-together looking mofo going to the office
'cause I sure only wear carmex or clear lip gloss.



...and in whatever I say, I hear you.

I'm not the only one. Because I don't know a single woman who doesn't wear at least a little lipstick. Even my sister, a tomboyish athlete, wears a little something now and then.

i'm sayin...to where i ain't GOTTA lie..or fake NOTHIN...
to where he either swallowinnit...gurglin it...or slidin thru it or paper towellin it up...


what *GETS* it for u??


me...

sideways 69...with somebody GIFTED AND TRULY TALENTED....
it's
a
rap...


thing is...

i've masterbated so much...

my clit tolerance is high as hell...



thas a prollem

for the mens...

It's too much going on.

Like, if it gets REALLY good to me, I'm going to stop giving. And I don't wanna stop giving. I also don't want it to get so good to him that he stops giving, either.

I'm currently having a lot of sex with myself, so this is all speaking on past experience, but yeah, I hate a 69. I'd rather recline and receive, then return the favor. And I PROMISE I'ma return the favor because if you good enough to fuck, you good enough to suck. I don't go there with guys I can't see myself slobbing on.

That's just me.

>Like, if it gets REALLY good to me, I'm going to stop giving.
>And I don't wanna stop giving. I also don't want it to get so
>good to him that he stops giving, either.

like
dannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng it's alot goin on...

then i get competitive...

i step it up
HE steps it up

by the end....

it's worth it all...


AND the bottle water afterwards


hell i'm bout 30...I GETS TIRED DAMMIT...

ain't no more 8 rounds

i tell a dude: you don't really wanna do the 69 thing. If i'm feelin it... and i SHOULD be feelin it... then I can't do what i need to do to make sure YOU'RE feelin it!

besides, that shit's kinda juvenile. You do it when you're young or just starting out just to say you did it... then you realize it's impractical and move on.

------------------------------
I'm so famous.(c) Joi
www.myspace.com/heavenleiblumoon

done deal.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

i love to kiss...i love tongue...kisses on my neck, collar bone, holding me tightly...

take it nice and slow on my tunta...tease, lick kiss suck gently...

it's a whole mental and physical experience where every inch of my body is touched...

if he can do that- then my response our passion together.....


hmm put it this way- i was responsible for that last tremor in CA last month ladies. my bags yo!

because it takes me a time or two to learn his body and figure out what will give me the most satisfaction.

the last person....i was on cloud 9 with my legs up..regular missionary-style or on my back with my ankles on his shoulder.

the person before that...laying on my stomach with a pillow underneath my stomach and my legs crossed at the ankles.

69 is alright...it's just awkward because i'm short and am attracted to tall men....like 6'0+ is what i want.

however, i need a partner who is sexually curious, i'm tired of attracting prudish men....and is willing to try new things. i had one side dish that i enjoyed because it was like he couldn't get enough of me....and there was nothing taboo to him, if it made me scream, moan, giggle, cry or happy....he'd do it twice to make sure i liked it.

i mean...i have to have sucking, licking, fucking, hair-pulling, bondage...the sky should be the limit.

*sigh*

my first sexual experience (which happened last month)
was so *ridiculously* painful that I wasn't really interested in trying anymore
& even when we did try a couple more times
:(
I just wasn't feeling it
& I'm wondering how I'll ever get from this point
to a place where I like it enough to know what I really like, feen for it, etc.
I'm kinda discouraged about it, really.


...and in whatever I say, I hear you.

no pressure.
start out like you just met again.
1st base
2nd, 3rd
then home when you're ready.

if he cares how you feel about it a few more days shouldn't be an issue.
and foreplay, foreplay, foreplay.
your body and mind has to be ready.


http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

I think I forget sometimes that it's not something I need to 'get right'... like there's gonna be a quiz later & I need to be ready for it ;)
I'mma try slowing it down & starting over & being easy
thanks again

:)

...and in whatever I say, I hear you.

what ive realized that the more i feel connected to a person the better the sex is for me

I just had that done last week, and y'all... I SWEAR, I was having aftershocks, HOURS later, nowhere near him. I was on the train thinkng about it aand I had to look around and make sure nobody noticed me quaking and shit. Penetration wise, from the back, or with me bent over, touching my toes, or with my liges ober his hsoulders.
------------------------------
I'm so famous.(c) Joi
www.myspace.com/heavenleiblumoon

:) i want him to LOVE getting me off
cum second
appreciate my every nook and cranny, haha

and as for that sensitive clit thing, have him lick your g-spot, entrance, indirect clitoral stimualation. it's heavenly

have a nigga just throw me over the couch and pound my shit from the back....


gets me everytime...

.....then flip me over, grab my hips and pull me closer.....*shudders*

and please, PLEASE make noises. i need to HEAR that you're lovin it.

any tips to clearin up the cookie area? I've used nair for a while now but there are razor bumps I'd like to get rid of...is it possible and how?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

I don't shave anything that I don't like hair on.

legs, cookie (lol), eyebrows. i don't like razors and for people with alot of hair (me) waxin is the best thing.

yes, it's painful that initial rip is nothing nice, but you'll be so much happier and your cookie will thank you.

i want to try it but i'm scared of pain- don't know why...cus i got this big ass tattoo on my back...

but i guess it's cus it's my tunta and its sacred...

what say you?

a bikini waxin, and am left with a well defined V basically.

from my understanding brazilian is when they take off most all of it and leave a landing strip, read: porno ladies.

now, it's not as if you're going to be spread eagle on the table and uncomfortable. usually i'm laying down with my legs making a #4.

and she proceeds to do what she wants. there is no getting past that initial rip, but afterwards, i'm telling you, you'll love it.

the understanding that my um, waxing specialist(?) made sure we shared about the brazilian before she started was that the *entire* thing gets waxed...allll of it
which made me nervous once I was there on the table about to get it done for the 1st time, even though that was what I wanted

-the first strip wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be & I told her so
her, grim faced: "it gets worse"
& sure enough, the next strip WAS worse...& the next was worse than the one before ...& so on...by the end, there were tears in my eyes, fam
*tears*

but I didn't regret it afterward
& I liked the way it looked & felt
but I think I can safely say it's not something I'm EVER gonna do again
-I've weighed the pain & the aesthetics (or whatever) & decided I'm cool--it's not worth it for me...I'll just shave or Nair or sumn instead
-all that pain, just for a smooth(er) cookie?
not that serious (for me)


...and in whatever I say, I hear you.

when they do your ass, that actually feels good... well to me it did
the middle top part on your pelvis hurt like shit
but it's worth it twice a summer

the wax is warm and it doesn't even hurt much, surprisingly
it just feels like a slight tug

try it, atleast once! far less ingrown hairs too

I cannot see myself getting the cookie waxed, girl.

I'll throw a razor down there every once in a while if I'm outta Nair, but I'm not generally a hairy chick anyway.

it hasn't gone away like I hoped.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

Thayer's Medicated Witch Hazel cures any and every skin prollem you got. Look for the blue label. $8 at Whole Foods, one bottle lasts me over 2 months.

I know you putting witch hazel on your cookie. I know. But it's really just skin. You don't have to put it ON the FLOWER, but on the mons, where the hair is, you'll be scraight.

I actually had an ingrown hair that got gross, so I put some of that on it and it cleared it right on up.

I use it on my face, too.

>Thayer's Medicated Witch Hazel cures any and every skin
>prollem you got. Look for the blue label. $8 at Whole Foods,
>one bottle lasts me over 2 months.


I love this stuff. My skin is sensitive and tempermental. I have to coax it into acting right and I have ti be gentle. I'm telling the truth about this. If I even think that I'm allergic to something my skin will turn red. And I'm lightskinned so this isn't easily hidden, ya know? But I LOVE this stuff. I co-sign the recommendation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

you'll be smooth sailing.

I know that shit hurts and you cannot sit here and tell me it don't, cause I be needing demerol to get my brows waxed.

but i never put a razor to my skin. once i got turned on to waxin i never looked back.

i grit my teeth, and just take it. really.

i use a depilatory cream under my arms....i'm trying to find a light one for my face, because waxing, plucking and threading has broken my chin out.

the only thing that doesn't break me out suprisingly is shaving on my chin. :(

and i usually take it ALL off (sometimes i leave a strip in the mid.).

Veet is nice, it comes with that bladless razor thingy which is helpful. It rinses well so you don't smell medicine-y.
lasts a good while. I do it twice a month usually.

for the bumps that are almost inevitable... i put some neosporin on afterwards. rub it in... go on about my biz.

just outta curiosity i would be down with the brazilian joint....but i dont know about lookin like a 9-year old girl...

actually it's probably 2 things but more than anything - my hair. Most days I really feel unpretty b/c of it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

I'm already in the process of doing something about the other thing, so it's fenna be a nonissue.

But yeah, I believe I'm fat.

There are fokes who say I am, but most fokes say I'm not.

I look in the mirror and see a fat girl. Damb being raised among a buncha white girls in the suburbs. lol

>
>There are fokes who say I am, but most fokes say I'm not.
>


yeah thats the WORST part...i still cant believe how much ive gained this past year..but im doing something about it...its to the point where i dont want my picture taken anymore and when i do...i rarely smile

my teeth i got a snaggle tooth from an accident way back when...they getting fixed though...


and my skin- i got tinea versi color which just ends up making me look like a racoon in the summer months and ish...


but they really don't bother me though- i mean i think abt it but eh i'm still cute.

maybe my hairiness- but shyt ain't never really affected me before and i don't want yt so nope i still have to go with anger and vengeance.

snaggletoothedness and tinea versicolor?

HA!

OMG

WOW.

I'm still cute as shit and loveable as hell, doe.

yup i'm still too crute so i just say eff it...but i'll hold a grudge till i see yo ass in need and decide that OP! today is the day that I need to shyt on you real hard...

sike nawl...i used to be that way- now i be tryna break bread and make peace.

1. my weight....i was pretty small until Spring sophmore year-Junior year of college....i was in a bad relationship and gained a ton of weight because i was so depressed....I was 230 lbs at my heaviest, and i am 5'0. i've lost over 60 lbs, but i still feel big. I've always been told that I have a nice smile or pretty skin....but i just really don't think i'm pretty....i'm cute, sure....but not pretty in a grown-up sense, and i'm almost 28 years old.

2. my legs....i always wanted little skinny legs, i still do. i can't find boots to go around my calves, i don't like wearing skirts or dresses because it calls uncessary attention to my legs. my mother always says if she had legs like mine she'd always wear dresses....however, i just really don't like them. my sister would call me "Thighs of Thunder" or "Thick Thighed Thelma". The thing is that i don't have cellulite and no matter how much i work out...they don't get smaller. Sure, I've had men say...they like women with big ol' legs...but honestly when men compliment me....I feel uneasy.

3. procrastination is my Achilles heel...it's a constant battle, and that's why i have to be soooo conscious of my time-management skills. Managing time has become a learned skill for me.

That's why there are only head shots on myspace. When your body is pointed out as an issue, over and over again... that reflection will start to transform.
Nobody likes too-skinny women either. Not the ones who count anyway.

It's been almosy 10 years since I got fat, and dammit I aint used to it, and even though I be working out, and doing the right thing, I SEE myself getting bigger, and I hate it. It aint even what other people have to say about it ( usually nobody is brave enough to) it's what I see with my own eyes and I know damn well I don't have any sort of dysmorphic disorder in my head. *sigh*


For real though, I'm going to a specialist SOON. And fuck bariatric surgery...thats for lazy muhfuckas that are WAY too far gone. I KNOW I ain't there yet.
------------------------------
I'm so famous.(c) Joi
www.myspace.com/heavenleiblumoon

I used to feel very unpretty about my hair.

Then I went natural, and it's gorgeous.

I loved my li'l nappy lopsided ass fro that I rocked. LOVED IT.

I never felt more free and beautiul.

When I had perms, I could never find a style that suited me that I could do on my own. My hair was always jacked.

I'm good now. And my locks touch my shoulders.

1- I procrastinate. I have had opportunities come right up to me, shake my hand and I have waved them goodbye with my procrastination. I overthink things too much.
2- My family. I sometimes feel guilty for wanting more than what exists in my family unit. I've had to get over the jealousy that exists.It was bad for a time. I would not revel in accomplishments for fear of some members not speaking to me.

I've learned that I'm not that chick. When I feel a certain way about you - the compliments come naturally. But if you're constantly asking me "do you miss me" "did you enjoy me" etc...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

but they translate it into something YOU aren't doing.

I mean really, I don't have the time for it.

it's so lame. "Did you think about me today?" WTF?

So lame.

for that fact

------------------------------
I'm so famous.(c) Joi
www.myspace.com/heavenleiblumoon

now that I'm single and meeting new people I'm kind of having issues deciding who goes where... i love em but women are complex.


(...oh is this just me?)


*crickets*

and....whether you love women or men....you are still a woman, and this post is for you :)...come on in.

i'ont even think i can offer any sage advice though....i would figure there is stuff that transcends gender though.

only thing i can say is just try and see...you'll know when that spark happens. there are a couple guys in my life where while they are great men and attractive....and would make great boyfriends. i really think that in the end if something happened....i wouldn't be the same without their friendship.

but there have been guys where...it would pain me too much to be their friend because i see so much potential for a relationship and i think that i'd be such a great fit for them.....where it would be like torture or putting my favorite dish in front of me and saying....you can't eat it, but you can smell it and even check out the ingredients.

>and....whether you love women or men....you are still a
>woman, and this post is for you :)...come on in.

:)

>i'ont even think i can offer any sage advice though....i would
>figure there is stuff that transcends gender though.
>
>only thing i can say is just try and see...you'll know when
>that spark happens. there are a couple guys in my life where
>while they are great men and attractive....and would make
>great boyfriends. i really think that in the end if something
>happened....i wouldn't be the same without their friendship.

its just weird for me because now that I'm single i'm like running into aquaintences that were just aquaintences but all of the sudden they come at me on some "i'm letting you know now that I'm attracted to you" style and it just totally throws me off. They were in the friend zone!!!

And on the other hand there are others that I have let know in the past that I'm attracted to them (as innocently as you can do while in a relationship) and them vice versa and now that I'm available I like try and broach going out on a date or something(do people ask people out on dates still? wth?) and its still "i'm playing coy with you" like wtf? I'm totally confused.

But on the other hand (yes three seperate hands) I have issues cause I'll meet a chick and be attracted and totally feel like a dude. Like, remember that post a while back where dudes were saying that 9 times outta ten if their cute platonic friend would let them hit they'd go for it? I don't want to be like that, but its in me a little...

I just am totally overwhelmed and confused. Like men are really simple. I was really good at deciding who goes where and making it stick but chicks are just different...

i think part of it is getting out of a long term relationship and just having culture shock. I've been pretty sheltered from all of this for over 4 years. It's all just very new to me.

>its just weird for me because now that I'm single i'm like
>running into aquaintences that were just aquaintences but all
>of the sudden they come at me on some "i'm letting you know
>now that I'm attracted to you" style and it just totally
>throws me off. They were in the friend zone!!!

see....and those are the exceptions to the rule though, it's like things never happened because the time wasn't right, or folks didn't have courage...it's a ton of reasons. however, i say even then....it's like do you actually see yourself enjoying that person's company and hanging out with them more and getting to know them better. it seems like things are soooo much easier you'd think, making the transition from acquaintances to potential mate....it's not tough. THEY LIED!


>And on the other hand there are others that I have let know in
>the past that I'm attracted to them (as innocently as you can
>do while in a relationship) and them vice versa and now that
>I'm available I like try and broach going out on a date or
>something(do people ask people out on dates still? wth?) and
>its still "i'm playing coy with you" like wtf? I'm totally
>confused.

that sounds like they enjoyed the thrill of the chase you know....kinda like "let's see how close i get to the fire before i get burned". those, i wouldn't waste my time with unless you are just looking to satisfy your curiousity about that person. usually that's more headache than what it's worth....i'm basing it on experiences i had, when i broke up with one ex...and it seemed like his "friends" were taking an interest....and these were friends who were supposed to be like family and everything.


>
>But on the other hand (yes three seperate hands) I have issues
>cause I'll meet a chick and be attracted and totally feel like
>a dude. Like, remember that post a while back where dudes were
>saying that 9 times outta ten if their cute platonic friend
>would let them hit they'd go for it? I don't want to be like
>that, but its in me a little...

lol...it's better than point A, and point #2 :). i think it's in us all because that comfort is there....they've seen you at your best and worst and they still like you and want to be around you. it gets rid of that awkwardness....like you can't snort and laugh at strange things...you are trying to put your best foot forward and all.


>I just am totally overwhelmed and confused. Like men are
>really simple. I was really good at deciding who goes where
>and making it stick but chicks are just different...

i swear....sometimes men are tougher than chinese calculus, if dating women is even tougher....i'd make a horrible lesbian :)


>i think part of it is getting out of a long term relationship
>and just having culture shock. I've been pretty sheltered from
>all of this for over 4 years. It's all just very new to me.

it's like you have to retrain your brain....and believe me you don't master it overnight. i'm still retraining my brain, and i've been out of a serious relationship for a little over a year. it's tough, but i'm determined to make it work because i'm too good of a person to just be holed up in here watching Law & Order and Court TV.

>

>see....and those are the exceptions to the rule though, it's
>like things never happened because the time wasn't right, or
>folks didn't have courage...it's a ton of reasons. however, i
>say even then....it's like do you actually see yourself
>enjoying that person's company and hanging out with them more
>and getting to know them better. it seems like things are
>soooo much easier you'd think, making the transition from
>acquaintances to potential mate....it's not tough. THEY LIED!

like i'm attracted but i don't really know how to act. Like truthfully? my skillset consists of screwing and being in a relationship right now. I don't know how to maneavor this "in like" stage. Thats what concerns me. Like there's mutual attraction but now what?



>that sounds like they enjoyed the thrill of the chase you
>know....kinda like "let's see how close i get to the fire
>before i get burned". those, i wouldn't waste my time with
>unless you are just looking to satisfy your curiousity about
>that person. usually that's more headache than what it's
>worth....i'm basing it on experiences i had, when i broke up
>with one ex...and it seemed like his "friends" were taking an
>interest....and these were friends who were supposed to be
>like family and everything.

see and that sucks cause she fine as hell lol And i feel you cause she was nothing but respectful of my relationship, but then i got single and there was a "hmmm..." and then a month later "i'mma play coy now." But yeah I probably need to step back from that one. Cast my little fishing line in another pond... It's not that hard to let someone know if you are truly trying to get with them.

>lol...it's better than point A, and point #2 :). i think it's
>in us all because that comfort is there....they've seen you at
>your best and worst and they still like you and want to be
>around you. it gets rid of that awkwardness....like you can't
>snort and laugh at strange things...you are trying to put your
>best foot forward and all.

right. like anyone who appreciates what a dork i am is automatically gonna get preferential treatment.


>i swear....sometimes men are tougher than chinese calculus, if
>dating women is even tougher....i'd make a horrible lesbian
>:)

maybe i didn't have enough experience with them. Or maybe the ones i was with were just simple pound puppy like people. lol


>it's like you have to retrain your brain....and believe me you
>don't master it overnight. i'm still retraining my brain, and
>i've been out of a serious relationship for a little over a
>year. it's tough, but i'm determined to make it work because
>i'm too good of a person to just be holed up in here watching
>Law & Order and Court TV.

that's it exactly! lol like it all comes down to friday nights. It's all about trying to get out of the house and away from Reba lol

>like i'm attracted but i don't really know how to act. Like
>truthfully? my skillset consists of screwing and being in a
>relationship right now. I don't know how to maneavor this "in
>like" stage. Thats what concerns me. Like there's mutual
>attraction but now what?

next step is checking out this mutual attraction....hang out with this person, conversation to see where her head is at and just let things progress at a natural pace.

>
>
>
>
>see and that sucks cause she fine as hell lol And i feel you
>cause she was nothing but respectful of my relationship, but
>then i got single and there was a "hmmm..." and then a month
>later "i'mma play coy now." But yeah I probably need to step
>back from that one. Cast my little fishing line in another
>pond... It's not that hard to let someone know if you are
>truly trying to get with them.

exactly.....yeah those intentions aren't all that honorable though.

>
>
>right. like anyone who appreciates what a dork i am is
>automatically gonna get preferential treatment.

EXACTLY....I mean i know i'm a big nerd...and anyone who likes that in me, definately scores bonus points.

>
>
>maybe i didn't have enough experience with them. Or maybe the
>ones i was with were just simple pound puppy like people. lol

i remember one of my friends told this guy that she was dating that he was so simple that he was complex, and at first i thought she was just drunk....but honestly it makes sense. it's like figuring this out is right in front of our faces but it's almost like you have to jump through flaming hoops to figure it out.

>
>
>that's it exactly! lol like it all comes down to friday
>nights. It's all about trying to get out of the house and away
>from Reba lol

I used to watch Reba....but you know they messed up and let me have too many channel choices, so I end up finding some documentary and there goes my friday night :)

ive had perfect flawless skin my whole life until last yr. now, i have this blemish that wont go away, yes its superficial, but its stressing me out, and the more i've stressed out about my skin the worse it has gotten/spread. ive even been to a derm and nothing has worked.

HELP!

and i also have keratosis pilaris on my arms. they're just dark goosebumps that wont go away and make me insecure about my arms,i always have my arms covered, which is a bitch during the summer time

really made a difference when I first started breaking out. Unfortunately, my skin just doesn't take to Florida, so I always have a little blemish here and there. I use Phisoderm to keep it down to a minimum.
I can't wait to move outta this crappy place and hopefully my skin will go back to being clear!

i had that when i was younger.
my mom had me scrub it as hard as i could, almost to the point of rawness with dial soap since its antibacterial and a rough cloth.
after that i lotioned it constantly till it healed up.
it never came back. that was 17 or 18 years ago.

its worth a try for you


http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

I've always heard in order to get the mate you desire, you have become what you desire... or somethin like that.


Does that actually work?


well even if it doesn't that's what I'm working towards right now, cuz I got some high expectations of what I want in a mate... and to be honest with my sisters, I ain't bringing enough to the table to attract *him*.


I'm working on my finances
I'm working on my physical
I'm working on my self-esteem
I'm working on not being so damned emotional


I predict this is gonna take a couple years, I hope it works for me.

anyone got any advice? been there? going there?

however....if the person manifests themself to you before you feel you are finishing improving self.....do you pass him by or put him on hold. that's a tough one though.

i've been improving my physical....for me, to try to make myself feel better....plus, it's healthy :)

improving my finances because i have goals....goaaaaaaaaaaals in different areacodes....areacodes j/k

i always say that i never expect anything of anyone that i'm not willing to give as well.....so the traits that i possess....i'm seeking those in a mate.

i mean he may not have his shit 100% together....but neither do i, if he has his shit 80% together....and i have mine 80% together, we can work on our 100's together.

I know a lot of people that have themselves together and are still looking for The One.

We were 24 when we got married so I don't think either of us were totally "complete". But after 7 years I will say that the key to our marital growth was individual growth. Once your in love with you it's much easier to be in love with others.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
www.myspace.com/tobi75

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Everybody wants to let go. But somebody's gotta hold on." --Kierra K

I don't really believe in the "you are who you attract" theory. I think no matter where you are in growth, you're going to be with some bad people and some good ones.

shit be out of control fam lol

my ex was in heaven that week....because i'd be nudging him @ 2am talking about..."you sleep?"

I didn't take my pill this month, so I've having the normal hormone stuff.
Man's out of town.
No *ahem* toys to play with.

shit is real, yo

i guess thats where sensibility comes into play
God gave us brains as well as bodies haha

an egg for the right father candidate.

i really do feel that my body is telling me more than ever it's time to squeeze one out....that's why i've been more cautious than ever, even with thinking about securing a jump-off, i've been SO hesitant about that.

because my body is like....um, next dude with good sense and his head on straight....we making some babies.

however, that's not happening so i've resigned myself to adopting because i really don't want to give birth after age 31.

it's a real and biological thing but you're right
you have to decide for yourself how to respond to your bodies message

its a tough call, but honey... being more careful is probably the best thing. cuz some of these niggas is CRAZY!

because i hear all these bogus baby daddy stories and it scares the hell out of me....raising a child is hard enough with 2 parents....but with 1 parent it has to be extremely hard, and then adding dramatics from the other parent....i couldn't deal.

plus....it's like i would like to have a child, and my body is giving me signs though....plus 2 failed pregnancies doesn't help my cause much either.

sorry to hear that
:(


but yes, you have the opportunity to decide on the best life to bring a child into, it needs to be a conscious and wise decision. you'll do whats best i'm sure
:)

i'd fuck a bed post...

it's crazy yo.

but i will cry at the drop of a hat

it's awful


worst time of the month ever...during the "visit" is smooth sailing for me.

cuz it hits me that I thought I'd be in a different place in my life by now
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

rather negative this past week..and Ive been going through that 'I thought I'd be in a different place in >my life by now' phase...*checks calendar* aunt flow due next week! lol

I'll admit it, Im very picky..but I refuse to settle for hot dogs when I know I can get Filet Mignon..I'm tired of meetin bols who look like they walked straight out of a Paul Wall video...grills/gold teeth..baggy ass clothes, big ass sunglasses etc....bols be like 30..still actin n talkin like they 17...dont get me wrong..we all use slang..but u gotta know when to professionalize ur vocab fam...and if one more bol tells me 'ur too smart' Ima go off..wtf kinda sense does that make..u can never be 'too smart'..ok rant over

I don't neeeeeeeeeeeed completion. I desire the complimentary

girl, I'd be richer than Oprah.

I have no answer for it. Mofos I know and mofos I don't know list my positive attributes all the time. I'm sooo sick of this question.

This one guy asked me "Who loves you?" I said "Me and my mommy". He wasn't even trynna holla, cause his wife was sitting right there. He just looked at me and was like "Somebody's gotta LOVE you. Why are you still single? " and I'm like, yeah, me and my mama, mane.

I have NO idea.

But for the record, I'm complete as is. I'm seeking my Compliment.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

im seen as being a 'mean ass' if that is the title for not settling in today's society then that is me.. & being a parent means i aint lookin for someone to be my son's father...

asked things a 30 year old man would never be asked.

children who are asked some of the stupidest ish....

u wanna know what is funny they always attract men w/children and i attract guys who don't have any..lolol

I don't care for that look either. And I hate answering the "why are you single?" question because I never know how to answer. I'm not desperate, I don't want just anyone. If I were to elaborate, then they'd probably think I was bitter.

so in that respect, i don't give a shit if i'm called bitter. I take it as a compliment.

and i automatically count OUT those who ask it.
i mean, who says i need to be single in the first place?
i hate that assumption.
i really do.

maybe i haven't met anyone who strikes me in that way.
maybe i'm busy.
maybe i have other priorities.
maybe i'm just okay by myself.

and I plan on being single for at LEAST about 7 more years. I cannot fathom introducing someone into my childs life in such a huge way. Yes, I know other people do it, and when I was younger and dumber ( and she was of toddler/preschool age) I made a go at it. It's not something I can or even want to handle. That'll happen when she's of adult age.
------------------------------
I'm so famous.(c) Joi
www.myspace.com/heavenleiblumoon

i've had relatives ask....why are you still single, and i might say something like "because i like sleeping in the middle of my bed"

some friends...although they mean well, have tried to introduce me to folks and it's like.....eh, thanks i appreciate the thought...he's what you think would be good for me and not what i want.

is that weak ass approaches that dudes be using

sometimes i wanna just be like STOP!!!!!!

-do NOT beep your horn at me; i will k.i.m.
-do NOT tell me to come to where you are; u wanna talk to me then come to me or walk with me
-do NOT ask me for my number before you ask me what my name is; you will NOT get it that way
-my eyes are on my face not in my cleavage
-do NOT press up on me when you tryna talk. i do not need you in my face i need my personal space. back back, gimme 50 ft (c) whoever iont remember who sed it but it works here
-do not call me "lil mama, baby girl, mamacita," etc. I have a name. Ask for it, then use it.
-have a conversation with me. dont let me do all the talking. thats the only way i can tell if i wanna get to know you more or not
-if i give you my number, do not wait longer than a week to call me. i will forget who you are. Trust there are other dudes tryna get at me too. you are not the only one in my view.
-also, if i give you my number, don't call me ten minutes after i meet you. thats annoying. STOP
-the first thing out of your mouth when you call had better not have anything to do with my pussy. that is the quickest way to guarantee that you will not be getting any
-do NOT have your friend holla at me for you. One of two things will happen. 1) if he's fine, and/or he comes correct, I'll prolly try to get at him. 2) if he's ugly, and/or does not come correct, I might not even hear him out.

sorry y'all, i just had a bad experience


www.vaynmag.com
www.myspace.com/trinapanther

"I'm the best person to discuss me with"- Furonda (ANTM)

This is just my interpretation of the situation- Andre 3000

one from about 4 days ago speaks volumes to this

Don't pull your car over. Especially at night. It screams "Unsolved Mystery waiting to happen." And definitely don't offer me a ride, lol. Like I'm trying to wind up on a CNN scrollbar as missing.

Who's responding positively that men keep doing this?

i know mad females that do that shit



www.vaynmag.com
www.myspace.com/trinapanther

"I'm the best person to discuss me with"- Furonda (ANTM)

This is just my interpretation of the situation- Andre 3000

No wonder.

Don't they know that's dangerous? And I'm not even over cautious. I'm always out alone or going out at night, but come on. A stranger in a car? lol. Okay.

u dont do that

but they hard headed

so sometimes u just gotta hope they learn on their own and dont nothing bad like rape or murder happens before they get a chance to learn it.



www.vaynmag.com
www.myspace.com/trinapanther

"I'm the best person to discuss me with"- Furonda (ANTM)

This is just my interpretation of the situation- Andre 3000

the asking for my number before my name is soooooooooo irritating.

Also don't ask me for my number w/o having engaged in conversation first.

it drives me CRAZY


www.vaynmag.com
www.myspace.com/trinapanther

"I'm the best person to discuss me with"- Furonda (ANTM)

This is just my interpretation of the situation- Andre 3000

chuuuuch...

specially verse four

why does the spokesman always look like 5 million times better than the homeboy in question?


-okayplayer loryn, a cali export

aim: Tiye215

alright bitches, i'm on myspace:
www.myspace.com/lcwzeta

ignorantart.blogspot.com

"you're never going to get anywhere without being a strategic bitch."-- professor jennifer james, GWU

in the back, and the spokesman be the finest one in the car.

I'm like, hell nawl, mane. That's aight, that's aight.

Good thing I haven't had holleration like that in a while.

the exact reason they be sending these dudes

they know they prolly dont have a chance in hell if they holla



www.vaynmag.com
www.myspace.com/trinapanther

"I'm the best person to discuss me with"- Furonda (ANTM)

This is just my interpretation of the situation- Andre 3000

http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2132831431
-----------------------------


niggas is beautiful- Ike M.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

my bags for the post beef- not really cus i wd probably do that shyt again.

but uhm all in all- this had me feeling the warm fuzzies of communion.

*carebear stares every single gal in this post*

i was wondering if you cd do that.

can't wait to meetchawl...

*group hug n shit*

exhales...


nigh night

x( I really would love to build with you ladies....i kinda felt left out tho when i read thru, seems to be mostly single ladies type issues, but maybe im reading it all wrong. *shrugs*

married or not. we all go through our dramas. You betta get on in and share. we can learn from you, cuz as single and independent as we want to be, quite a few of us are DYING to get in your place.

yay, ok! Thanks for the encouragement, sis :)

married or not. we all go through our dramas. You betta get on in and share. we can learn from you, cuz as single and independent as we want to be, quite a few of us are DYING to get in your place.

<--"a love sweet as candy, why waste it..you might not taste it again" (c) Eric tagg.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/77516364@N00/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/95181492@N00/

http://www.myspace.com/foxynotsobrown
http://www.myspace.com/damfunk
http://www

u helped doe, girrrrrrrrrrrrrrrl...lol

i HATE crying

i do cry easily and i've gotten a lot better at it, but i just think it looks and feels so pathetic even though it's usually warranted hen i do it.

my mom taught me not to cry in front a dude cuz it makes me look vulnerable and weak...dont' want the mant o think he can get over on you, i guess.

my best homegirl said i tend to apologize when i cry in front of people. i can come off kinda hard at first because i'm confident and strong willed and i don't bite my tongue...i guess i worry if somebody sees me gettin all weepy then it takes away from that image.

slightly unrelated to this:

ladies, how do you feel when people say to you that they thought you were a bitch before they got to know you?

why do people say that about you?

-okayplayer loryn, a cali export

aim: Tiye215

alright bitches, i'm on myspace:
www.myspace.com/lcwzeta

ignorantart.blogspot.com

"you're never going to get anywhere without being a strategic bitch."-- professor jennifer james, GWU

cryin makes me feel very weak...when my Mom 1st got really sick..I cried in front of my coworkers..I was so pissed..I don't like people seeing me like that..

it's not that *I* think crying is weak, but I guess I think it's unnecessary. I cry when I'm frustrated to the point of no return or really sad/hurt/angry. But i'm usually alone in those moments.

I don't want to cry in front of others because *THEY* think it's weak and I don't want to give anyone an excuse to coddle me. I don't need it.

I've been dealing with my own emotions my whole life and I don't want anyone to feel like they have to "rescue" me.

I hate crying in front of people too

like to me, showing almost any sign of emotion was a sign of weakness, crying being the worst

like, mad ppl would be like, nah trina its cool, its okay to cry

but i just caint do it...esp. in public
>slightly unrelated to this:
>
>ladies, how do you feel when people say to you that they
>thought you were a bitch before they got to know you?>why do people say that about you?
ppl always call me a bitch. sometimes they just dont get how i play. sometimes i just aint in the mood to be bothered. sometimes i just dont know and/or like them. It never really bothered me, because if they got to know me, they'd see that I'm a sweetie. if they dont and they wanna think/say that, then let them do it. either way, i really dont care.



www.vaynmag.com
www.myspace.com/trinapanther

"I'm the best person to discuss me with"- Furonda (ANTM)

This is just my interpretation of the situation- Andre 3000

who feels the need? the pull to birth some babies? why? why not? yall know we don't have to, right? it's really not required.
I think i'm done w/ it. been there, done that. it's been real and enlightening, but i'm closing shop.
and i'm not mad at any woman who feels the same. it's hard, selfless, sometimes stressful work being someones parent/keeper/meal ticket/etc, etc.
now, i love my son more than my life but he'll have to live without any siblings and I know he's pretty glad about that because, well, he told me so, lol.
I got 6 more years to go before I'm sippin mango tea on my porch in Hawaii, my grown son coming home during summers and major holidays, if he's so inclined.

>who feels the need? the pull to birth some babies? why? why
>not? yall know we don't have to, right? it's really not
>required.
>I think i'm done w/ it. been there, done that. it's been
>real and enlightening, but i'm closing shop.
>and i'm not mad at any woman who feels the same. it's hard,
>selfless, sometimes stressful work being someones
>parent/keeper/meal ticket/etc, etc.
>now, i love my son more than my life but he'll have to live
>without any siblings and I know he's pretty glad about that
>because, well, he told me so, lol.
>I got 6 more years to go before I'm sippin mango tea on my
>porch in Hawaii, my grown son coming home during summers and
>major holidays, if he's so inclined.



We are SO >Here< with this thought.

------------------------------
I'm so famous.(c) Joi
www.myspace.com/heavenleiblumoon

and his name is Miles. lol

and if i get pregnant....i'm gonna come over and spread all my pregnancy phermones. Just contaminating your child-free home with baby energy. nah...i'll wait until your baby is 18 and then do a fertility dance on your front porch once a week and have a fertility celebration at the full moon

:)

i do.
I've been pregnant a couple of times before and the last time I intended on keeping it, but miscarried.
i want kids because i'm selfish i think. that's kind of odd because you have to give so much to raise kids. I'm okay with that though. I say selfish because i really want to raise the kind of family that i never had. it's important to me. important to add some GOOD people to this world for a change.
and I want to accomplish lots more before i have any. want to travel and grow personally. want to meet the right man and do it "by the book."
I want to adopt too.

however... I don't want to be 35 and just getting started. I know that's self-defeating though... putting myself on a schedule and all. But right now, that's how I feel. I got about 10 years to get it crackin'

the pull to birth some babies?

because i think i wouldn't do a half-bad job of being a parent and i think that i can provide a child(ren) a stable and loving home.

yall know we don't have to, right?
LOL...yeah I know, but 30 is right around the corner and i have neither chick nor child...some instances it cool, sometimes it's like *sigh*

when i turn 30....the shop will be closed the fuck down, and we're snatching the plumbing out. i would definately consider adopting though and have done so....i have had 2 unsuccessful pregnancies and in retrospect i look at it as it wasn't my time and in one situation, my body wasn't able to handle a pregnancy. since i haven't found anyone worthy enough to start a family with....adoption is my option. if i do adopt...i don't want to adopt a baby, i'd rather adopt a school-aged child though, and definately a Black child....it's so many little Black children that need stable and loving homes. Even if i have a baby of my own...i'd still adopt a child.

i can't see it at the moment. or near future.

but I wanna see what my body can create. Giving birth is the greatest potential God has for the female body imo. If you can do that, you can do anything.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

now it's scratched, lol.

and i'm terrified it wont happen...

honestly i just feel like the odds are slim to none that i'll find someone that will make a great father AND husband...most of the men ive dealt with thus far seem to have only the potential to be EXCELLENT at either or and thats just not good enough for me...

i dont know maybe i need to stop obsessing over it...

you have to realize there is a possibility that you could be doing most, if not all of the parenting. I consider myself lucky, but there was a long stretch in my sons life where I felt like the only parent, and we lived w/ his father at the time. circumstances. Now, I've all but checked out (in my perfectionist eyes ;)) and his dad is majorly making up for those 3-4 years. or worse, you could lose your husband, their father (divorce, death, incarceration, whatever). I mean, shit happens.
i guess what i'm trying to say is, if you want kids, don't have them on the condition that someone else will be there to help you. have them w/ the full intention of devoting _your_ entire self to them, because whether "hes" there or not, you'll have to.

i almost feel like its either all or nothing...as a woman i'm prepared to do most of the nurturing, but i think i'd rather not have children at all if it means there's even the slightest possibility that i'll lose their father to estrangment (physical or emotional) or divorce...

i grew up somewhat without my father and its been so painful for me that i cant see myself putting my offspring through that...

you have to take it day by day. there are no guarantees.
parenthood is just like marriage. You wake up every morning and do your best, that's it, that's all. you either plunge in or not. no dibbling, lol

i have the biological, spiritual, and emotional need
not any time soon, but i will definitely try to have more before i reach menopause

i love babies

.....do you do it? have you done it before? why? why not?

the other day i was doing some networking at a reception. i wore a really, REALLY low cut cocktail dress. *knowing* that my boobs are GIGANORMOUS and that it would draw lots of attention because there were a lot of men there.

but then...

i started getting a little more attention than i wanted, and definitely not the *kind* of attention i wanted.

the oogling, drooling, hungry looks from the men, obviously not interested in my talent. the disgusted, she-must-have-slept-her-way to the top, stares from the women.

i had an "a-ha moment" (c) oprah. i had been so shy and so insecure about my body--especially my breasts--for so long, that it was like i had started rebelling against myself. i was using the attention to validate my physical worth in order to redeem the part of me that has a poor body image.

although that night wasn't the 1st time i had teasingly used my sexuality for attention, it was definitely the 1st time i went that far. but that night, it was like i caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror and i was not happy with reflection. needless to say i'm on that "new leaf" stuff now.

oh, and i have to add that at the end of the day, it's not about flirting or low-cut dresses or anything else like that. cause that's just fits some people's personalities. but when we're MOTIVATED by insecurity, we'll never be able to be proud of the outcome.

I wasn't blessed with curves, lol.

I can banter with older men a little and know that I'm kind of gaining an edge, but I feel like they're thinking of their daughters or something.
Honestly, I always kind of admired women who can hoist the cleavage or cross their legs in a short skirt and get instant service. It sucks being the woman that men let the door slam on.

and no, i don't rely on my body or looks to get things. I'm too smart for that.
but it sho doesn't hurt if you wanna grease the wheels a lil bit.

i have no qualms with those that do....i mean if it helps you (not you personally....you collectively) sleep at night, do you.

however...i'm so concerned with people seeing my mental worth, because i'm in a field where i have to be 3 times as smart as my white male counterpart to get 1/3rd as far. :( i realize i have some nice features....but i don't want to be seen as just a pretty face.

even in the way i dress, i don't want to dress revealing because i'm hoping that all the men i encounter aren't such troglodytes that even if i have on a burlap sack and paper bags on my feet....that they won't try to undress me with their eyes...alas, a woman can only dream.

i swear im the biggest advocate of this....shit keeps me sane i tell ya

i mean i pretty much got everything else i need in life (friends, family, a lil bit of money)...im really just missing that ONE thang....

and ill admit...im a lil too selfish to be in a relationship right now so imma kinda cool on that...but the fuck buddies will keep ya outta therapy fa'real!


yall feel me or am i alone on this one???

it's empty

i'm sayin...i've had the priv of havin my "buddies" as long time friends...so they also "know" me...

but at the end of the night..i'm still only cuddlin with a hot pocket and a glass of somethin...


i'm longing for long lasting now...


i've had a lotta sex already


i want the rest...

thats the perfect word to describe it.
some vibrators have more soul.

see for me sex goes into that 'air, water, shelter' category of basic needs of life...

just something to hold me over til i find someone that can fulfil the deeper shit...

but ive realized that if the "basic" stuff isnt taken care of...i cant even concentrate on the deeper shit....meet fairly nice dudes but if its been a minute, they might as well be sittin there saying "blah blah blah blah" cuz im truly not paying any attention

just something continuous and low dose (like a patch...lol) does wonders for me....cuz f'real if i waited for emotional fulfillment i'd be in the crazy house

sometimes i'm in the mood to just kick it with a guy on some "fuck buddy" type steez. other times i really wanna hold it down with one steady "boo".

you gotta have open communication with FBs though. Like hey, this is what this is... nothing more. These are the rules. Etc.

you can't have too many either.

and you gotta watch out because sometimes, the men get more emotional and caught up than you will! Callin and naggin'. They can't understand that this is strictly a relationship of CONVENIENCE!

But right now, I'm kinda off the FB trail. Maybe when I move it'll be helpful to take care of the "itch" while i get settled, LOL.

and if you get a good one...you will try to hold on to it. i had 2 good ones. one we lost touch with each other...the other things just fall apart.

but sometimes they are just as much a pain as being
in an actual give-take relationship.

!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!
I am the Black Gold of the Sun...and i love things........Im gonna make you love me

whats your regimen ladies?

post em if ya have one

mines is pretty basic:
cardio 3-4x a week
strength training 2x a week
dance damn near everyday

what yall know about that bikram yoga son!

i'm a slacker right now.
and for the most part, i like the way i look. i know that i just want to tone up some areas and that it would be fairly easy to do. I'm just slacking.
but it's getting warmer out and maybe that'll be my incentive.
I just hate traditional workouts.

I need to start taking dance again. Or maybe get with a summer league (bball/volleyball).

since there aren't any classes I can take this summer - I'll be walking/joggin around RICE UNIV again. I'll start Mon.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

I do about 100+ squats
30 ab roller excercises
pilates dvd for abs
jogging

got any ideas??

websites??

recipe clubs??

i can murder some vegetable stir fry but a sista run outta ideas quick!

but them chicken sammmiches be callin' a sista....

no, there are a few cookbooks for healthier eating, are you a veggie-tarian? If not...that Patti labelle cooking joint is a great one
not the first one, but the one she put out after she was diagnosed with diabetes.

!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!
I am the Black Gold of the Sun...and i love things........Im gonna make you love me

www.recipezaar.com

www.epicurious.com

and then i invent as i go along....i need to go grocery shopping, but i just haven't had the energy to do that. i've had a bowl of froot loops for dinner 4 out of 7 days :(

No breads or rice for a month because I have done it and it does work. I have lost alot but gained muscle. And no Eatting after 8 pm... Lets have 6 small meals a day.. try it and see where it goes.

because i'm not an avid meat eater....it's only certain vegetables that i like. i can't totally deplete my body of carbs because i am really not that sedentary, i don't have a desk job...i'm usually out in the field (60% of my workweek...in which i'm walking uphill or downhill and excess of 3 miles), plus i do cardio and have other activities.

i agree with the smaller meals and eating more frequently....i have to make myself do that. also...increase your water intake....i was told that you should drink half your numeric weight in ounces

example: if you weigh 180 lbs....try to get approximately 90 oz of water in a day. that's not hard if you think about....a bottle of soda is like 20 oz., a can of soda is like 12 oz. i started drinking an 18 oz bottle of water before my meal and with my meal also.

i don't eat after 7 pm either...unless it's a piece of fruit or carrot sticks

I've often run across many a woman that feels that having a man completes her existence. Making the man the center of her world...she's that same woman that when things fall apart she has this huge void in her life. I'd like to take this time and let sisters know that they can balance their men and their friends/family etc...No man wants someone so far up into his life you can't differeniate the 2..get out get up and get something...of your own..hobbies, volunteer, et. al. Take this free time to empower and enlighten yourself thereby creating a healthier relationship.. Love you no matter what the circumstance....You can only love someone as much as you love yourself.

Peace babies.

:)

This was a great post to read. A sista already said it but its seems like the single sistas post and I really dont have anything to add.

But thanks ladies.

***************************************
<----who I love

you have something to add....put an issue up there :)

i'd like to hear/read what's goin on on that side of the fence!

craziness.

You haven't been blessed with the infamous 'is your husband married?' line yet? Or some other craziness.

LOL..I know this sounds crazy but I gets no HOLLERATION at all.
Maybe I just have the "married woman" look. Even though I am happily married and not trying to sample want is out there BUT DAMN IT I AM CUTE TOO!!

My biggest beef is with these women trying to be my co-wife on the low. Some of yall think corporate america is trip. Try working in an African/concious/black power enviroment. Same catty man stealing bullshit cloaked in Black Righteousness. They be on some "its better for the community and the children to be polygamous" They aint trying to build anything they are just trying to fuck and say HAHHAH I stole him from you.
They know me and they know we are married but its all tits and grins in his face when I am not around. I am like BITCH STOP .

Its funny sometimes I want to complain about him eating all the food, leaving his funky socks all over the place and just being a man then I feel dumb because a lot of women want to be where I am and I need to stop complaining because he treats me like a Goddess on Earth.
********************************************************************
<----who I love

I think I also must be afflicted with the "settled down" look!! Even on the days when I don't wear the ring!! It's CRAZY!!

And on the conscious/pan-Afrikan community tip - I'm feeling you on the extra-heavyhanded flirtation.

I've got a good, good, good friend and I SWEAR her husband's so called sister has more than just familial relations on her mind when it comes to him. If I'm feeling it and my husband had noted it, dontcha think she should be feelin' it too????

Quandries and quagmires, I swear!!!



If you don't know, now you know....
http://www.farafinakan.com/
http://www.theadinkragroup.com/

up there in the midst...

all ladies are welcome...

ngccot.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<--In honar of Mother's Day

just as long as you don't CRUSH!

i have crushed on a married man, but that was it..and
i didnt flirt, nor did i tell him. I just enjoyed
him being him. and he was wonderful to his wife.

it was a phase......and it phased out
!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!
I am the Black Gold of the Sun...and i love things........Im gonna make you love me

i really think marriage is sacred and not to be fucked with by outsiders.

but i must admit to knowing a man was married and still thinking to myself "he's cute, he's sweet, i wonder what it's like to kiss him, he's funny, etc" but at the end, it's always... well, he's married. and i K.I.M.

*Sigh*

If your actions don't match the words, i could care less about what you say.

I just have alot of fear when it comes to love especially when he shows it...I guess I am used to being "just me" for eveything. And I seriously need to get over that.

girl...

how many times have i fell for that shit...


honestly..bonamie ain't NEVER said nuffin more truer than

if it's all about ass

be honest cuz thas all *I* may want

i'm ALLLLLLLLLLLL for honesty

i *think* it was B who said it

but WHOEVER SAID IT

thas what i'm screamin cuz

a sista only got ONE heart left...

iont trust no dude when he says that to me

like compliments--- i always think there is an ulterior motive

and most times there is


www.vaynmag.com
www.myspace.com/trinapanther

"I'm the best person to discuss me with"- Furonda (ANTM)

This is just my interpretation of the situation- Andre 3000

don't mean to barge, but ya'll are churchin' a whole lot in here & i hope deez okie doke niggaz use it to grown on & not craft that good ol' inbox holla

but enuff wit the securing

when will there be a day when this kind of "bonding" can occur in a joint post

cuz i kinda wanna go back & forth on a myriad of these topics, cuz they're very interesting & "most of my conversations with men seem to revolve around music"

so i find females more interesting to debate with

but chyeah...

...so he found me on myspace and requested to be one of my "friends"

But he didn't write me a note or anything.

Why didn't he write me a note???

I shouldn't care but I do.

He's one of *those* EX's....

I'm kinda glad he looks a hot mess... it makes it "go down" easier.

Do a Ramona DeBreaux and "Let His Ass Go".

You a ATLien, so I know you know that song. Don't even waste no energy thinking about they asses.

But yeah, they ALWAYS come back. ALWAYS resurface.

Don't respond.

They kill me w/ that subject line only shit or that popping up on MySpace shit.

You be like 'nigga wtf you WANT?"

I decided not to write him either. He really crushed me when we broke up. It took ages to get over it.

we broke up, what, 3 years ago??? he's still tryna get back together with me...i cant even say i blame him, i did everything for him when we were together and he was so indifferent towards me...now he wants another chance but i'm DONE...

he says i'm heartless...lol i dont even want him to know where i live cause he seems obsessed...i'm thinking i need to cut him off completely but i dont want to hurt him even more than he's hurting now

fine and dandy and then..BAM..here he comes....I'm muy over now though..so its whateva

The most recent one shot me an email last week-ish.
Nothing too heavy, just wishing all was well although he did admit there was a lot he could say but it was best left alone. I thank him more than he'll ever know for doing just that, leaving the whole mess alone.
I hope we can be friends one day, being that he was a very important part of my life for almost 3 years but right now it's much too painful to keep in contact w/ him.
This Friday would've been the 3rd anniversary, ugh.

you natural?? permed up?? locked up??...y porque??

I went natural because the last time I put a perm in my hair...it ended up in the sink lol...I had be contemplating going natural for a while..but I finally took the plunge..and am happy I did so...Ive been wrestling with the idea of gettin locks...we'll see what happens with that

cause i'm in the gym

I'm permed and I don't really like it. It's not about self-hate (I don't get why people think that's the only reason). It's just been permed since I was 13, and it's pretty easy to manage.

I hate perms though and I do want to go natural, but I really don't think my face can pull off the no-hair look, so I think about growing off the perm. But that'll take forever, and I don't want braids, so I don't know what to do.

I imagine I'll get fed up enough and do something drastic, but I'm less likely to regret it then if I get to that point, because I'm quite the indecisive Libra. I used to love my hair but now I'm just tired of it.

I wish she wouldve told me no....I didnt think my face would look right with the no-hair look, thats why as soon as I cut my permed hair off I got micros the very next day...if u dont want braids I suggest you let ur hair grow and u can straighten (hot comb) ur new growth until it gets to ur desired length before u cut off the dead hair..I too am I Libra..so I feel u with the indecisiveness

but she made me wait. When she finally permed it, it was because all that hair was getting hard to deal with. We had the hot comb that you heat on the stove, lol.

I'll probably end up just growing it off. But I need to move to a city with some decent beauticians first. I'm just getting by here.

but I'm always wearing wigs cuz I don't know what to do with this damn hair. I've done twists, curly pudding, curly meringue, curly sweet potato pie, even... I don't know what looks good. Right now I got my hair french-braided and I just slap on a wig and jet out the door.

I wanna have it pressed, but my Granny is 80 and she even burns her own scalp now...

I'm almost ready to go get a perm... but that gives me a flaky scalp.

maybe a sewn-in weave... but I want QUALITY QUALITY weave, I'm willin to pay the price, but where do I go in Chicago? I ain't seen nobody walkin around my 'hood with the hair I want.

its not funny..I finally got a press n curl this winter..it looked sooo pretty..it made me wanna have a perm again, jus for a little while...I sumtimes twist my hair..and wear it krinkly..I need to get it dyed again...my granma really wants to see my hair straight again..but when I go home its gon be too damn hot to try to rock sum press n curl..shit gon be press n fro...as for gettin a quality weave in Chicago..I have no idea where u should go lol

i didn't get my first perm until i was 13, and i regretted it....ended up letting it grow out and chopping it off. when i was in HS...i was in the cosmetology program, I was constantly doing stuff to my hair....i was more into hair color than anything so i knew that in order to do the things i wanted with color....i'm talking extreme like pink, red, blue or purple hair and weaves....i would just keep it natural and press it or wet set my hair.

now...i'm not as fascinated with coloring as i was in school, i like playing with texture more....so i'll weave it or do whatever to it. hair is an accessory.

oh yeah....i locked for 7 years also.

my granma gon have a stroke

and my friends and i would see who could have the highest frenchrolls.....folks wasn't ready when i broke out the mardi gras beads draped around the frenchroll.

my folks weren't all that excited about me locking my hair, but once it got longer and people were complimenting me in the streets....it was like they grew on my mom. she was sad when i cut my locks and asked me when was i going to lock my hair again.

my mother used to brag to coworkers that were trying to lock their hair about my locks and how healthy and pretty they were and the styles i used to wear them in.

that was a loooooong time ago....

in my fingers waves n french rolls lol

when i got to high school...the fingerwaves were whatever color i wanted them to be.....wasn't nothing for me to have 3 diff. hairstyles flowing,

i had the swept bangs in the front...with 2 mini frenchrolls going up and curly hair at the top...and lets not forget the long hair in the back also.

i had the honeycomb ponytail with the loops on it.

spray and sparkle was conservative for me.....it was all about the fantasy hair. i was in heaven when i went to ATL for my first Bronner Bros. hair show....my cousin was a stylist and my friend and i stayed with her.

lol

I did in in college. It was for style and for personal politics as well i guess. LOL.

Now i like my texture and the way it has a mind of it's own. although that's also why i can't stand it sometimes. I really wanna do something different. I get a bunch of compliments, but to me it's just the same old thing. I should try this wig thing. I just don't want it to be wack or tacky.

I envy those silky perms sometimes. I remember when my hair was like that back in the day.

I envy nice locs too, but i can't commit. I think I just wanna be able to change it when I want to.

I need a hair consultation. Can we do that at the RE too?

same time lol..I hated being catergorized though..I did it because my hair was comin out..not because I was 'peace-peace' or for n e poltical reason lol...I LOVE my hair texture too...people always look at me funny when I say 'water' when they ask me what I put in my hair lol....my aunt has sum really nice long pretty locks..I want some :(..um u betta hit Sha up for ur RE hair consultation

Aight...so i can't wait to meet summa yawl...
this post has made me feel like we've sat down at some resturaunt and chatted for hours...

what are you all lookin forward to?

and can we get together like this in person?

i KNOW about one room i'ma be in...lol

OPTOMETRIST...we gotsta get to walmart togevva, lady...

however you are in NC...and that's nowhere from ATL, and I'm the queen of the roadtrip.

I haven't made any bonds with any lady lately, but there are a gaggle of
past ladies i want to see.
!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!
I am the Black Gold of the Sun...and i love things........Im gonna make you love me

and even tho we're in NC I ain't seentchu (except for at the Dave Chappelle Movie joint)!!

I hope we can all politik like this in person... those of you who are gonna be there. This is my first okp event and i'm looking forward to people being generally nice and interesting and overall hilarious.

but you know, the Palmer's Cocoa Butter is the only thing I've talked about in this post that can be found there.

The Thayer's Medicated Witch Hazel (blue label) and the Bragg's Apple Cider Vinegar are both health food store items.

But we'ca still go to WalMark. We'll hit up the health food sto' on the way back, lol.

my problem is this. i know this guy. he is really sweet and spiritualy centered and we share similar interests. he's funny and genuine.....

and i really really WANT to like him.
but i can't get pass the fact that i'm not physically attracted to him AT ALL.

is this shallow?

should i just get over the lack of physical attraction and give it a try just because i am so attracted to who he is as a person?

she let they guy know that they could be just friends and thats it..

It's not shallow. Everyone has eyes so physical attraction is going to hold some weight. Nothing wrong with that unless that's ALL you're looking at.
If you're not attracted, you're just not attracted. Don't try to overcome it. It's cruel, even though you don't mean it that way. Trust me. Just spare him and yourself.

and damn nat "men are more visual" crap

if u ain't pleasin to our eyes...we can just "be*friend" u too...


*exhales

No. I've been there before and I was miserable. The physical attraction needs to be there.


>my problem is this. i know this guy. he is really sweet and
>spiritualy centered and we share similar interests. he's funny
>and genuine.....
>
>and i really really WANT to like him.
>but i can't get pass the fact that i'm not physically
>attracted to him AT ALL.
>
>is this shallow?
>
>should i just get over the lack of physical attraction and
>give it a try just because i am so attracted to who he is as a
>person?

ladies, we gotta stop doing this. If he is movin' on, and we are holdin' on, then he is the only one progressin'. I am guilty of this myself. I have held on to people, tried to make it work, gave of myself completely to someone who soooooooo didn't deserve me. What is it that makes us stay long past the final hour? Ladies, let's help and inspire each other...

so many of us are taught that our self-worth is tied to our ability to find, keep and please a man. admitting that a given relationship is not working, or has not turned out the way we had hoped, goes against all of that.

...and in whatever I say, I hear you.

nobody wants to admit that they gave so much to keep things together and got nothing/very little out of it in return. I'm still dealing with this myself.

very interesting...but i feel like i'm eavesdropping...

i think men are so much realer with each other than they are with us...why is that? they dont trust us or something?

u gotta pry..but u gotta do it on the low..they already think we're annoyin as hell lol

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
www.myspace.com/tobi75

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Everybody wants to let go. But somebody's gotta hold on." --Kierra K

because i feel like everyone needs that outlet to be free, and the post was for men....thus it wasn't for me....and maybe i'm being hypersensitive, but it was like....even though the 2-3 guys that posted in here meant well and there was no malice in their comments....i felt like gotdamn, i'm being respectful enough not to intrude in your space....please can you be respectful and not intrude in mine.

i would have if i wouldve piped in...

and i know for damn sure they reading this shit...prolly printing it out and studying it line by line...aint nothing wrong with that matta fact i'm glad they are

to sound off and say stuff they won't say around women or whatever went on in the post...that was just my personal choice. i'm indifferent about them reading it....on the strength that i can't stop anyone from reading anything...and it's not my place to do so.

>i would have if i wouldve piped in...

true...that and even making your presence known in the post even if you really didn't have anything to offer would have been like an intrusion. that's pretty much what i'm gearing it towards though....the male posters that did make their presence known...while i'm sure are good people and mean very well. i felt like damn....i'm doing my part to let y'all have y'all own space...could you show me the respect and do the same. that's all i was getting at....the lurking/reading is not a problem....just the responding was a slight issue. if i would have seen it in the other post....i would have felt the same way.

i guess i'm one of those ones when posts are directed to a specific demographic, i try to be respectful and not interject anything because it's not directed towards me....if i'm interested in what's said....i'll lurk/read and move on.


>and i know for damn sure they reading this shit...prolly
>printing it out and studying it line by line...aint nothing
>wrong with that matta fact i'm glad they are

hey they probably are....if they are studying it line by line or whatever, ain't nothing i can do about it either. i guess the things i shared...i shared it as a sounding board with other women....not really to give men a "look into the psyche of a woman" so to speak.

mannin' up when it comes to sex

i wanted to scream AMEN!!!!

one thing i hate is when a dude asks, "can i kiss you?" or "do you wanna have sex?" or sumthin

if i was in the mood before, its definitely gone after that

JUST DO IT (c) Nike

if i dont want you, I'll let you know

but i caint deal with no shy, timid, or scary dude


www.vaynmag.com
www.myspace.com/trinapanther

"I'm the best person to discuss me with"- Furonda (ANTM)

This is just my interpretation of the situation- Andre 3000

to some extent, and maybe they just don't want to put themselves in a place of potential hurt
who knows
men are silly

honestly i couldn't even read most of it

cuz I can't read all of this in one sitting, and some of y'all have some good things I want to remember.

41 year old (lookin' like a 27 year old) pinches my waist after church (in the sanctuary) and giggles tawnbout, "So you've gained weight????"
A week later, her 29 year old neice does the exact same thing.
I was speechless both times and I laughed it off and told them both, "Well, I am getting older..."
Somebody please give me a better quipp than that!!!! I don't wanna be a bytch up in the church, but I *DO* want them (or whoever else tries that sh*t again) to know that I *see* them.

.....is to refer to scripture. next time just say something like: "yeah i have gained weight. isn't wonderful that God looks at our hearts instead of judging us by our outward appearances?" and smile and wish them a good day.

they'll leave you alone after that.

if not, you're just gonna have to hide your razor blade in Psalms and cut 'em after service. lol. i'm joking.

but you girls have kept on going!
this has been the best post i have seen on okp in a while
all the comments and thoughtful words are beautiful

i almost cried while reading this
you all really came out and helped and guided each other

beautiful thing, ladies.



|latina212|


be fluid~~~
be water~~~

yoooooo, that shit is aight!

they know what they want and they make CERTAIN
that they get it.

no doubt. if u never listen to me about anything else,
heed my suggestion on this: get a BOSSY older female mentor.
if u are cool, they will dote on u like u are their daughter
AND they will show u how to get whatever the fuck u want.

for me to have any woman as my mentor/guide/inspiration
i'd need her to possess the qualities of my best friend, but it's not a bad idea to have wisdom in your life

>she'd have to seriously have her shit together

and, thats the best part about having a mentor.

no matter how much they may seem like they have their shit
together, they ALWAYS have some kinda issue/development
need.

always.

imro, its securing to know that even "superwomen" can still
stand to grow up a bit.

but i'd atleast prefer she have a realistic and optimistic approach to her issues, a refreshing outlook at her flaws

and what is IMRO?

That's my earthday!

Your girl will be making her 26th evolution around the sun you hear me.

Please i'm jamaican...and even tho i love my latina sistas- you taught me the bachata and hw to make the rice with olives and green peas you know where you gotta put the brown paper bag over it- hmmmm delish...

uhm yeah it's all abt my 26 earf day ya'll!
ps. i'm hungry now...

anywho yeah don't forget to celebrate me on the 5th. And yes i know that is extremely self-centered...but heh you get to turn 26 once right.

And i know i'm an 80's baby. I'm the pioneer of this generation ya'll don't you forget it! haha!

being abstinent for 7 years and single since 2001 just has me in a weird place.


-i only am interested in being with a guy unless we were friends first. i can't bring myself to date a complete stranger because i don't think any other guy would understand me better than a friend would/does.

-when you tell a guy you haven't had sex in 7 years you get some pretty "special" reactions:

"WHAT THE HELL!?!??! did it die?"

i'll just stop there, because they don't really get any more different than that.

-i'm extremely quirky with a shitload of emotional issues and i'm not afraid to make that known. i'd rather you know wtf is up with me than later on down the line after it's pissed you off to the point of asking me what the fuck is up with me.

-there are sexual kinks i'm into(some only exist in my imagination for safety reasons)that i'm almost certain many guys would not be interested in. i've only known one who was and he is 100% not my type.

-i'm a germaphobe.


i don't really know where i was going with this reply
i just thought i'd add it to the post.
_________________________________
a loaded god complex...cock it and pull it.

it keeps you from functioning in necessary situations or unless it is very distressing to you and you want it to change
everybody get's anxious. i get bubbleguts before dates and seriously think about cancelling, but you have to learn to calm yourself down and know that the worst that could happen really isn't the end of the world


>-i only am interested in being with a guy unless we were
>friends first. i can't bring myself to date a complete
>stranger because i don't think any other guy would understand
>me better than a friend would/does.

hopefully you have a lot of male friends or make friends quickly. otherwise i don't see anything wrong with this. getting to know strangers is all a part of the building-a-relationship process, and ideally at some point you'd be friends and lovers



>-i'm extremely quirky with a shitload of emotional issues and
>i'm not afraid to make that known. i'd rather you know wtf is
>up with me than later on down the line after it's pissed you
>off to the point of asking me what the fuck is up with me.

there is such thing as too much information. a simple fact: everybody has issue. so knowing that it's not necessary you list all your issues when you go out on dates, thats scary. everybody has issues, don't hide them but don't display them on a billboard either. if it needs to be discussed when it comes up then so be it.

now... talkin about the "fuck side of the menu" or it's been 3 dates and i slept over already or any other situation
some men think they are entitled to shit, but that an issue in and of itself

i'd confront expectations head on. if you aren't ready, talk about it
if you are ready, talk about that too and find ways to satisfy him in non-sexual ways vice versa
if he's too immature to accept that then atleast you found out beforehand

ewww that really irritates the shit outta me.

who actually says "can we have sex now, please?"
lmao muthafckas are a trip

i have plenty of married and committed gfriends who still complain about this. Being made to feel like a receptacle, reduced simply to this one thing.

Any thoughts on how to handle that within a seriousl monogamous relationship?