..coming home from the bodega over the wkd (sat), a friend pointed out this guy that initially appeared to be breaking into a car. a closer look revealed that this fool wasn't breakin' into anything, he was breakin' OUT.

dude was masturbating in broad daylight, in front of a school. while the school was closed, there were plenty of kids on the playground.

i immediately turned, walked up to him and yelled, " GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!"

what's crazy is that he saw me approaching (looking me dead in the eye) and didn't stop until i screamed on him. he actually looked a bit surprised that someone took him to task about it. it took everything in me to control my emotion. i sternly chastised him loud enough for everyone to hear, and escorted him to the nearest train station (*making sure he knew he would never be welcome in the neighborhood again, for any reason).

i thought about simply calling/flagging down the police, but just didn't feel like dealin' with the bullshit that day.

one of my neighbors (president of our block association) saw everything and thanked me for stepping in, but i couldn't help but feel torn about the situation. i take a hard line stance on inappropriate behavior involving children, but i know that addiction/mental illness is very real. i don't feel bad about getting involved, but part of me feels like we're not doing enough (overall) to truly help in these situations.





*skatin' the rings of saturn*


..and miles to go before i sleep...

he should never forgive you.

---

im not sure i could escort a person i just seen jacking off in public.

i feel like that person is liable to do anything. i mean anything like lick my face or some shit, or kiss me or some shit.

i aint havin that.

kudos to you for stepping up.

i might have hit him with a 'c'mon cuz!, quit playing around!'

no walking him nowhere though.

>but feel torn about the situation. i take a hard line stance
>on inappropriate behavior involving children, but i know that
>addiction/mental illness is very real.

I never know when we are to draw the line on mental illness. When do we place the "blame" on the illness and not the individual?

>>but feel torn about the situation. i take a hard line
>stance
>>on inappropriate behavior involving children, but i know
>that
>>addiction/mental illness is very real.
>
>I never know when we are to draw the line on mental illness.
>When do we place the "blame" on the illness and not the
>individual?

..as far as i'm concerned: when you know better, DO better.

i don't know the extent of his situation, but he was middle-aged (grey whiskers n'all), a bit disheveled, but clean. the fact that he never made an attempt to hide what he was doing let's me know he wasn't afraid of getting caught. hell, he was probably getting off on the fact that people could see him. that alone let's me know that he's too comfortable with that shit.

he needs help, but he has to want/seek it.


*skatin' the rings of saturn*


..and miles to go before i sleep...

good for you and all that.

but i'm not overly concerned about kids seeing someone masturbate. i'd be alarmed if i suspected he was going to touch any of the kids. this guy seemed more interested in touching himself. and i can't tell from your narrative if the kids could even see him. though if they could i wouldn't be too troubled - masturbation is part of life and kids either already know what it is or will know soon enough. it's a teachable moment in a way - b/c they should also be taught that masturbating in public is a bad idea and is something they should not do. why? i'm not sure - except that it's part of the social order. for whatever reason we treat it like something about which ppl should panic and so i'd teach kids not to do it so as to avoid that unnecessary drama. and they can do that when they're alone. but i'd want to avoid them thinking masturbation is dirty behavior - b/c it's not.

>good for you and all that.
>
>but i'm not overly concerned about kids seeing someone
>masturbate. i'd be more concerned if i suspected he was going
>to touch any of the kids. this guy seemed more interested in
>touching himself. and i can't tell from your narrative if the
>kids could even see him. though if they could i wouldn't be
>too troubled - masturbation is part of life and kids either
>already know what it is or will know soon enough. it's a
>teachable moment in a way - b/c they should also be taught
>that masturbating in public is a bad idea and is something
>they should not do. why? i'm not sure - except that it's
>part of the social order. for whatever reason we treat it
>like something about which ppl should panic and so i'd teach
>kids not to do it so as to avoid that unnecessary drama. and
>they can do that when they're alone. but i'd want to avoid
>them thinking masturbation is dirty behavior - b/c it's not.

there were plenty of people (including children) that saw him.

i'm not one to shame sex, but public masturbation is lewd & obscene (esp in front of children). what you do in private is one thing, but adults masturbating in front of children will never be cool. the fact that he chose to do this in front of a school yard takes it to a whole-notha-level © mad tv.

i don't know if he would've escalated to possibly approaching a child, but i wasn't willing to take that chance.




*skatin' the rings of saturn*


..and miles to go before i sleep...

i stand on what i said before - it doesn't sound like this guy was going to touch any of the kids so i don't think i'd have been alarmed.

i think we make too big a deal of public masturbation - even in front of kids. i think we work too hard to 'protect' kids from the idea of sex not for their own good but for ours. i dunno that kids would be scarred by seeing a guy masturbate. b/c what's the big deal about masturbation? kids do it too.

again, as long as the guy was keeping his hands to himself i don't think i'd have been alarmed. i'd have approached him and told him to put it away and leave the area, sure. but not w/the same force you seem to have used. b/c i don't think the situation warranted all of that based on what i read in the OP.

..this has nothing to do with demonizing sex or healthy sexual behavior.

it has everything to do with poor judgement.

everyone is free to masturbate, but they need to do that shit in private.


*skatin' the rings of saturn*


..and miles to go before i sleep...

and i've successfully defended ppl charged w/that crime. LOL

i stand by what i said.

..i understand your position.

doesn't mean i have to like it.

keep fighting the good fight.


*skatin' the rings of saturn*


..and miles to go before i sleep...

you did the right thing - i would've done something similar.

On the one hand you don't want kids to see that kind of shit, particularly if you're a parent. On the other hand, I think the whole "causing psych trauma" to a kid is fairly overblown when they see something like that.

I know I've got a story to tell about a lot of shit, but... yeah... The wife and I drove the family out to LA for the weekend back around the summer of 2005. While we were there, we were heading towards Sunset and turned a corner and right there, in front of everyone was some tall skinny black dude doing what I can only described as "piss jacking" in a garbage can attached to a sign pole or something. Dick out, fully exposed, pissing with what I'm assuming was a semi on, and at the same time stroking it. I saw it, the missus somehow missed it, but my oldest daughters saw it. At the time, my oldest was only 11 years old and her sister was just 6.

They both laughed their asses off after letting out an "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEW!!! Look at what he's doing!!!"

No trauma, no anything. They have grown up to have normal, happy lives.

This isn't to say that all kids will take it that way, but at least some might see some shit like that and find it hilarious, others will be scared, some will be affected.

At the same time, I can see SoWhat's point about masturbation in general. We, as a society, tend to demonize it to the point where you can't really have a healthy attitude towards it despite it being completely natural (in AZ, it's legally considered "self abuse"). I know this was a subject NEVER discussed in my household growing up, and neither my father or my stepfathers discussed it with me. Seeing something like that should prompt a discussion with the children by their parents to explain it, and let them know it's illegal to do such a thing in public, but it's perfectly fine to do in private.

>RE: I can see both sides of Cy/SoWhat's argument

there was never an argument/debate. like i said, i respect his position on the matter, i just don't agree.

but NOT for the reasons he stated.

its not as simple as kids being exposed to masturbation. kids are exposed to quite a bit (i was, and i survived). i'm not concerned permanent scarring n' such. i don't believe that sex should be demonized. the difference is that no respectable/responsible adult should ever engage in masturbation in front of children. i don't give a damn what people do in the privacy of their own homes alone, but that shit ain't ridin' in public.


*skatin' the rings of saturn*


..and miles to go before i sleep...

>the difference is that no
>respectable/responsible adult should ever engage in
>masturbation in front of children. i don't give a damn what
>people do in the privacy of their own homes alone, but that
>shit ain't ridin' in public.

I don't understand the mentality of a person (male or female) that does something like this in front of kids... If it was a bunch of adults I wouldn't give a shit and would prolly laugh at the person complaining. But in front of kids??? Nah b, but hey... we could just be conditioned. for all we know there's some indigenous culture out there where rubbin one out in front of everyone might be ok and no one cares.

IJS... 'cause there's plenty of cultures where walking around naked except for a string of beads on your waist or something in front of kids is just fine yet in our "civilized" society that sort of behavior will get you locked up and on a sex offender list.

---------------------------

"Where was the peace when we were getting shot? Where's the peace when we were getting laid out?
Where is the peace when we are in the back of ambulances? Where is the peace then?
They don't want to call for peace then.

That's definitely molester type behavior to me, to be doing it anywhere near or around kids.

as long as he doesn't touch a kid it's all good, IMO.

and based on this narrative i see no reason to think this guy was going to touch any of those kids. he was touching himself.

>as long as he doesn't touch a kid it's all good, IMO.
>
>and based on this narrative i see no reason to think this guy
>was going to touch any of those kids. he was touching
>himself.

public masturbation is against the law (indecent exposure) in nyc. its a misdemeanor, but still.

*DONGI DONG!*


*skatin' the rings of saturn*


..and miles to go before i sleep...

this is one of them.

at home and jack off, even if he never ever plans to touch a child...I mean...I still think that's over the top wrong, but even that is different. Him being right there, out in the open, where the kids are? Probably making eye contact with them as he does it? It might not be the same as him actually touching them, but nah...that shit ain't anywhere near cool.

i stand by what i said.

in public (using her as the source material, not that that could be proven), be any type of sexual assault?

im trying to envision a society where its "cool" (or not criminal) to be inspired by the beauty around you and pleasure yourself accordingly lol. "hey ma, stay right there, i'm almost finished"

but ugh. it's just a fucking penis. we should all get over it.

..this is why i actually stepped in instead of ignoring it.

anyone living in nyc long enough has likely encounter some crazy muhfukah masturbatin' on a late night train (or worse). this was completely different.


*skatin' the rings of saturn*


..and miles to go before i sleep...

Next thing he will be on the school grounds doing it. Then after that touching a little kid while he does it. Then after that dressing up as a witch and luring kids into his clay pot oven.

that's not necessarily true and has no bearing on this incident.

i stand by what i said.

Socially its pretty damn tacky.

Why would you wanna do it outside anyway. Bugs flying around. Too much background noise. I like to go into my bedroom, turn all the lights off. Put on some noise cancelling headphones and relax. Seems more ideal.

but damn. it's JUST a penis. we should relax.

1) masturbation is okay

2) masturbation in front of children is also okay

>but i'm not overly concerned about kids seeing someone
>masturbate. i'd be alarmed if i suspected he was going to
>touch any of the kids. this guy seemed more interested in
>touching himself. and i can't tell from your narrative if the
>kids could even see him. though if they could i wouldn't be
>too troubled - masturbation is part of life and kids either
>already know what it is or will know soon enough. it's a
>teachable moment in a way - b/c they should also be taught
>that masturbating in public is a bad idea and is something
>they should not do. why? i'm not sure - except that it's
>part of the social order.

i genuinely don't think public masturbation is a big deal - even if kids see it. i genuinely think we expend way too much effort attempting to 'shield' kids from sex unnecessarily. i genuinely don't believe kids will be scarred if they see a guy manipulating his penis for his own pleasure. i genuinely believe we attempt to keep kids from sex b/c we think sex is dirty and we want kids to exist as some repository of 'innocence' for OUR benefit more than for theirs. i genuinely think kids have no reason to make a big deal of sex unless WE give them reasons by panicking about it.

but yeah, it's okay to traumatize kids because you had a hard time as a child and if you survived then they can survive seeing perverts stroke off in front of them

i don't want to be a parent but not b/c i dislike kids.

>but yeah, it's okay to traumatize kids

again, i don't think kids are necessarily traumatized by seeing a man manipulate his penis for his pleasure.

because you had a hard
>time as a child and if you survived then they can survive
>seeing perverts stroke off in front of them

you tried it. i dunno why. but you're not very good at this so you should quit now.

maybe you were trolling then too

but yeah let's not conflate masturbation being healthy and strangers exposing themselves to children, unless you're willing to admit it's trolling

blind eye to anything that is predatory in nature.

for registered sex offenders?

Used to see someone jerkin like once a month

thats completely messed up

After seeing that picture of you on instagram, I'm all YEAH

So. Yeah. Mental illness is real, but so is trauma to children, and just scaring him off is enough for one day. You did good.

Now get on with your bad self.

~ ~ ~
All meetings end in separation
All acquisition ends in dispersion
All life ends in death
- The Buddha

|\_/|
='_'=

Every hundred years, all new people

..i honestly felt bad about showing that kind of emotion in front of my neighbors (non violence), 'cause nobody wants to be labeled as the "angry/scary black man."

thanks, janey. you're a doll.


*skatin' the rings of saturn*


..and miles to go before i sleep...

the angry scary black man.

j/k

who has a bigger problem with the cops than the mentally ill? probably the most at-risk group for police killings and other police violence.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BVkTmnJkAN8


*skatin' the rings of saturn*


..and miles to go before i sleep...

...

>what's crazy is that he saw me approaching (looking me dead in
>the eye) and didn't stop until i screamed on him.

This visual KILLT me.

Sun like, "Yeah I see you, but I ain't givin' up dis nut reGAWDless!"....*keeps strokin vigorously*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y8q7ttP3AQk

Classic shit!







"Come on dawg, you hittin my elbows!" will NEVER get old!

but in general, I think all public sex acts shouldn't happen and not that people need to keep things at home, but there is a time and place for everything. if it's a possibility that other adults can see you, ok i see the thrill...but by a school, in front of children in broad daylight? that person is disturbed. esp considering he wouldn't stop when he saw you walking up to him.

just because WE (as adults) may think it's okay, doesn't mean it is...and in no way can i tell another adult how to raise their kids, so it's best to err on the side of caution meaning, he needed to be checked that this isn't ok.

short story...

my sister and i saw a man flashing and jerking off in the mall parking lot when I was like 15. my sister was 9. I was BEYOND disturbed. I felt violated. I was uncomfortable. My sister was like "gross, we dont' want to see that." and we didn't. no one has the right to force sexual activity upon anyone else...at the very least, before someone starts jerking off in public, they should ask the ppl around are they cool with it. if not, go home.

... There are some people that do. I would've called 9/11 so damn fast.

*Scust at public flagrant fapper*

Calling the cops would have been extra but you diffused the situation, eliminated the risk for the kids and also probably discouraged him from coming back.