I'm saying there's no sensing in hammering that disappointment home.

You can't put that genie back in the bottle.
Stop for a second and think.

You don't think she'd already feel a profound sense of failure and disappointment? Unless she's a spoiled, self centered, disrespectful problem child, she'll probably feel an awful lot of things and disappointing her loving parents is probably a huge weight on her shoulders as it is.

What good will come from hammering that home further?

Don't get me wrong, there are discussions to be had in this situation, but no baby shower is harsh. You could argue that a shower would essentially be a celebration of poor decisions but I disagree completely.

You discipline and chastise your kid when you catch them in the act of getting pregnant. If she winds up getting pregnant though? That's a whole new ballgame. Now she has to learn to be an adult. Now her life choices are altered in major ways. Now her priorities need to change dramatically. Frankly, that's punishment enough and my disappointment can kick rocks and cry rivers because MY priority at that point shifts toward helping her manage a life-altering change.

Any whip cracking and discipline that mattered needed to be done prior to this happening and there's no need to take an extra pound of flesh for a very human mistake.