ok so went out with this lovely young lady one night
we are having the time of our lives enjoying each other and drinking wine and talking...

so she comes back we enjoy each others company and fall asleep ...

so we had drank A LOT of red wine... well red wine and my stomach are like freebasing in a fireworks factory...

so i sneak out of bed and use the restroom... well i unleashed a fury unknown to man and God in that bathroom... now to throw her off i ran the shower so she thought i might be in the shower not shitting my brains out... 1/2 or so later i'm done
i shower come out

she was still sleep so i lay next to her... she pops up and was like hey need you to take me home gotta do xyz... let me freshen up in the bathroom and i'll be ready in a min...!!!!!!!!!!!!!NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I was like ummm listen u don't want to do that right now... told her about my stomach troubles and she was like oh it can't be that bad... i'll be right back... i'm like nooo.... she didn't listen...

she opened the door and screamed OH MY GOD ARE YOU DYING ON THE INSIDE... WE CAN NEVER LIVE TOGETHER IF YOU DO THAT!!!!

she clowned me all the way to her house and to this day reminds me of it when we talk