in the eleventh grade, i was outed to my mother by the attendance counselor at my school for holding hands with another girl. i was falsely accused of being lewd in the school and making the school look bad...for being gay, even though i had never engaged in any sexual act with a girl or even had a girlfriend. this man went to my internship and said the same thing to my supervisor there. he told teachers and faculty that i, a straight-a honor society student, taking classes at george washington university at 15 years old, as well as achieving in athletics for two schools in dc...that i made them look bad. for holding hands with a girl.

my mother immediately forbade all girls from calling my house, forced me to go to church DAILY, made all the church officials pray for me then accused me of resisting my deliverance. i was not allowed to leave my house unless i was escorted. i couldn't play ball without constant supervision, even in the locker rooms during halftime. all of my female friends were harassed. i was forced to wear skirts three times a week to school and forced to wear my hair out. i was beat, kicked out, verbally maimed, disowned financially, and dismissed by those i loved and unable to outlet to anyone who understood. i got to college, thinking i was free, and was discriminated against by administrative officials and teachers. i was denied independent status even though my parents had disowned me, but they made too much for me to receive financial aid. financial aid told me that since my sexuality was a CHOICE, it was my own fault. it is my seventh year and i'm finally graduating.

after coming out, i wanted to die. i hated life. i hated myself. but i never hated heterosexuals. and it boggles me how some heterosexuals can show disgust for love that has nothing to do with them. or condemn a day that doesn't even have anything to do with them. i go to the pride parades because it is the the ONLY place i can express myself openly without fear of being attacked, accosted, or verbally abused.

so if you are one who can find a reason to hate on pride parades, then fuck you very much. bitch my mother doesn't love me...i got bigger problems. to the heterosexuals who show love and tolerance...peace.

below is a list of SOME of the HETEROSEXUAL privileges. it's a long list, isn't it???

-Blank

1. I can go into a music store and find the language of my sexual orientation represented in the lyrics.

2. Television and movies reflect my relationships in widely diverse and nonstereotypical ways.

3. My children are given texts and information at school that validates my sexual orientation.

4. Society encourages me to marry and celebrates my commitment.

5. As a responsible and loving parent, I won't lose my children in a custody battle because of my sexual orientation.

6. I can easily buy postcards, books, greeting cards, and magazines featuring relationships like mine.

7. I don't have to worry about being fired or denied housing because of my sexual orientation.

8. I can be sure that if my spouse is in the hospital and incapacities, I can visit and will be consulted about any decisions that need to be made.

9. Insurance provided by my employer covers my spouse and my children.

10. Hand holding with my love is seen as acceptable and endearing.

11. I can serve my country in the military without lying or keeping silent about my family.

12. I can keep pictures of my loved one on my desk at work without fear or reprisal.

13. I will receive all of my deceased spouse's estate, tax-free.

14. I never need to change pronouns when describing the events of my life in order to protect my job, my family, or my friendships.

15. If I'm a teenager, I can enjoy dating, first loves, and all the social approval of learning to love appropriately.

16. If I'm called to work with children or to serve God (in most denominations). I don't have to violate my integrity and lie in order to keep my job.

17. As a responsible and loving adult, I can adopt without lying about my sexual orientation.

18. I feel welcomed and accepted in my church.

19. I can be certain that my children won't be harassed because of my sexual orientation.

20. I can count on my community of friends, strangers, and institutions to celebrate my love and my family, mourn my losses, and support my relationships.

21. I can be pretty sure that my roomate, hallmates and classmates will be comfortable with my sexual orientation.

22. When I talk about my heterosexuality (such as in a joke or talking about my relationships), I will not be accused of pushing my sexual orientation onto others.

23. I do not have to fear that if my family or friends find out about my sexual orientation there will be economic, emotional, physical or psychological consequences.

24. I did not grow up with games that attack my sexual orientation (IE fag tag or smear the queer).

25. I am not accused of being abused, warped or psychologically confused because of my sexual orientation.
I can go home from most meetings, classes, and conversations without feeling excluded, fearful,
26. attacked, isolated, outnumbered, unheard, held at a distance, stereotyped or feared because of my sexual orientation.

27. I am never asked to speak for everyone who is heterosexual.

28. I can be sure that my classes will require curricular materials that testify to the existence of people with my sexual orientation.

29. People don't ask why I made my choice of sexual orientation.

30. My sexual orientation was never associated with a closet.

31. People of my gender do not try to convince me to change my sexual orientation.

32. I don't have to defend my heterosexuality.

33. I can count on finding a therapist or doctor willing and able to talk about my sexuality.

34. I am guaranteed to find sex education literature for couples with my sexual orientation.

35. Because of my sexual orientation, I do not need to worry that people will harass me.

36. I have no need to qualify my straight identity.

37. My masculinity/femininity is not challenged because of my sexual orientation.

38. I am not identified by my sexual orientation.

39. I can be sure that if I need legal or medical help my sexual orientation will not work against me.

40. If my day, week, or year is going badly, I need not ask of each negative episode or situation whether it has sexual orientation overtones.

41. Whether I rent or I go to a theater, Blockbuster, an EFS or TOFS movie, I can be sure I will not have trouble finding my sexual orientation represented.

42. I can walk in public with my significant other and not have people double-take or stare.

43. I can choose to not think politically about my sexual orientation.

44. I do not have to worry about telling my roommate about my sexuality. It is assumed I am a heterosexual.

45. I can remain oblivious of the language and culture of LGBTQ folk without feeling in my culture any penalty for such oblivion.

46. I can go for months without being called straight.

47. I'm not grouped because of my sexual orientation.

48. My individual behavior does not reflect on people who identity as heterosexual.

49. In everyday conversation, the language my friends and I use generally assumes my sexual orientation. For example, sex inappropriately referring to only heterosexual sex or family meaning heterosexual relationships with kids.

50. People do not assume I am experienced in sex (or that I even have it!) merely because of my sexual orientation.

51. Nobody calls me straight with maliciousness.

52. People can use terms that describe my sexual orientation and mean positive things (IE "straight as an arrow", "standing up straight" or "straightened out" ) instead of demeaning terms (IE "ewww, that's gay" or being "queer" ) .

53. I can if I wish arrange to be in the company of people of my sexuality most
of the time.

54. If I should need to move, I can be pretty sure that my neighbors in such a
location will be neutral or pleasant to me.

55. When I am told about our national heritage or about "civilization," I am
shown that people of my sexuality made it what it is.

56. I can be sure I will not be denied insurance, employment or credit due to
my sexuality.

57. I can arrange to protect my children most of the time from people who
might not like them.

58. I can remain oblivious of the culture and customs of homosexuals and
bisexuals without feeling in my culture any penalty for such oblivion.

59. I can be pretty sure that if I ask to talk to "the person in charge," I
will be facing a person of my sexuality.

60. I needn't hide my sexuality in certain situations for personal safety.

61. I can leave a nightclub consisting mostly of people of my sexuality
knowing I will not get harassed or attacked for my sexuality.

62. I can go home from most meetings of organizations I belong to feeling
somewhat tied in, rather than isolated, out-of-place, outnumbered, unheard,
held at a distance, or feared.

63. I need not fear financial and emotional truncation from my family simply
due to my sexuality.

n/m

that's just, wow.

you can say it howevermanytimes in howevermanyways...

it never gets through.

it's always about; oh you make a choice
(like that makes it okay to be treated like shit or less than normal.)
or you can choose not to show it (why would anyone want to do this?)/
or stop being all over each other in public
how disgusting, two men, but two women is cool
or seek help.
or whatever.
fuck 'em

because the very ones speaking that googly googly goo...don't know how to address this.

..."It's wrong!!"

Why?

"because it is!!"

Why?

"shutup"

Just like the "nappy headed hoes" discussions, it's just the dominant sexual orientation dictating the rules instead of the dominant sex.

<-------- foundation inna London

"I cannot dissociate myself from the future that is proposed for my
brother. Every one of my acts commits me as a man. Every one of my
silences, every one of my cowardices reveals me as a man."

Frantz Fanon

which seems to be the catalyst to this one

and niggas fall for the oke doke every time...


<-------- foundation inna London

"I cannot dissociate myself from the future that is proposed for my
brother. Every one of my acts commits me as a man. Every one of my
silences, every one of my cowardices reveals me as a man."

Frantz Fanon

Im sure just as many doors were shut due to her sexuality, and anyone else's, there were a few doors open because someone understood.

Person what she wrote out was extremely necessary and valid. it should have been posted, and someone who was oblivious just might get it. Someone who already got it just got affirmation to keep there eyes open because this type of discrimination and mistreatment and close mindedness is still alive

support this shit. dont act like its all on deaf ears. like heteros dont give a fuck.. we do.

i was addressing the folks that despite whateever you say or do
do not seem to get it.

and i can say that because we've spent overwhelming amounts of time and energy trying to do just that.

folks that get it, get it,
folks that make *certain* kinds of posts, dont
and it might take a brick before they do.

i dont see why you are taking it personal.

why dont you, chill regular, fam.

>i was addressing the folks that despite whateever you say or
>do
>do not seem to get it.
>
>i dont see why you are taking it personal.
>
>why dont you, chill regular, fam.


Im not taking it personal... dont think im offended, or man. Im just saying chill on not backing this. dont be so harsh on straight folk and the validity of the posts message

... i knew what you were saying, but thats like people telling Malcolm not to speak his mind because niggers aint trying to hear it and whitey DAMN sho aint listening

Its better off if she tries to say it, you never know who she might affect. not just me, but the next person.

I dont think her words were wasted.

or how i say it.

my opinion does not influence in any shape or form what she chooses to say/ how she expresses herself.

her reaction is to explain her situation,

mine is to say fuck 'em.

they are both valid.

my bad

lol @ the above exchange. i think she and you agree with, but misunderstand each other.

thats how it goes.

You a tough ass sistas to me though. poweful post indeed. im glad you put it up.

I hate you had to deal with all that ignant shit, but damn if it didnt make you good people anyway.

it's cool, fam.

not at all
i think its important to explain to folks what heterosexual priviledge is about
(it's not even the big things for me, it's the assumptions folks make about you)
i've just become increasingly frustrated with how people think/feel here
we've spent an incredible amount of time and energy talking/discussing/debating this over and over again
and it never gets anywhere.
it almost feels like nobody changes their opinion (moral or otherwise).

so yeah, i did say that out of frustration.

and also because i increasingly refuse to accomodate people
with the naive belief that if i explain my point of view they just might get it.

most of the time i don't even bother. i never look to change opinions tho...just to put the truth out there. the parade post jus pushed me above my threshold, straight up.

No message

No message

No message

No message

i still remember that story, btw.

it's unfortunate, tho.

i knew what the fuck really happened. cuz i've been there so many times. i never retaliate tho...because i'm non-violent and also because shit like this is likely to follow.

how the fuck do you go to jail and YOU'RE the victim?

im going to inbox u

and my reply, "i don't want to see a man and a woman all the time fon-do-ling, either."

peace & light ma

this post is sincerely felt

i love my gay-bi friends

======================================
http://www.flickr.com/photos/tade/

that list is some straight biting offa that white privilege one though, shit is kinda hodge podge...





<-------- foundation inna London

"I cannot dissociate myself from the future that is proposed for my
brother. Every one of my acts commits me as a man. Every one of my
silences, every one of my cowardices reveals me as a man."

Frantz Fanon

>that list is some straight biting offa that white privilege
>one though, shit is kinda hodge podge...


doesn't make it any less accurate

like the shit aint true anyway.

i've said it a million times, some of the smartest ppl turn MEGADUMB when sexuality is discussion...

j/k

when you comin through to start that forest fire?

i'm trying not to cry @ my desk....

congratulations for finishing school and striving to live your life on your terms as best you can. :)

it's tons of stuff i want to say without sounding corny...i go to type something then i backspace.

peace & light,

there's alot that can be said, but it would all just be babble if i tried to type it all.

i got much love for blankstare tho, that's my L Word buddy, lol.


um, ms. cyn, i need to email you.

i've never interacted with her, but based on my observations....she's cooler than the other side of the pillow.

zee-zee: my e-mail addy is ageniuschild at gmail.com

much love, tho.

>i'm trying not to cry @ my desk....
>
>congratulations for finishing school and striving to live your
>life on your terms as best you can. :)
>
>it's tons of stuff i want to say without sounding corny...i go
>to type something then i backspace.
>
>peace & light,

if there was a pill or something that turned gay people straight, i think the gay population would be significantly smaller.

seriously. and thats sad because WE'RE not the problem.

but i loooooove women, lol.

>but i loooooove women, lol.


i will definitely co sign on that one....women are too beautiful

i laugh @ how people on here claim to be openminded but as soon as sexuality comes in they turn out to be the most narrow minded homophobic mofos on earth.

>i laugh @ how people on here claim to be openminded but as
>soon as sexuality comes in they turn out to be the most narrow
>minded homophobic mofos on earth.


so ture so true.. they're racist to homosexuals.. shoe's on the other foot and they running scared!

>so ture so true.. they're racist to homosexuals.. shoe's on
>the other foot and they running scared!

Is there any sense in this nonsense????



<-------- foundation inna London

"I cannot dissociate myself from the future that is proposed for my
brother. Every one of my acts commits me as a man. Every one of my
silences, every one of my cowardices reveals me as a man."

Frantz Fanon

YOU DID GOOD!!!!! MISS LADY!!!

thank you thank you thank you!!!!

No message

I *really should reconsider and come to NYC in june
but im still not sure, yet.

we'll miss u but the choice is clear. i'm looking forward to it tho.

and i gotta find out where that party's gonna be since they closed down those clubs...

going to stockholm for 4 days (max)
and then a month later i'll be back in london headed to kenya.

and then i was thinking: i dont think i'll be in the u.s next summer either.

but, have a blast for me!

find the party spot(s) in nyc,
(not escuelita), when i move ima need a hang out
(and not francesca's either)

actually the last three times...which coincidentially were the only three times.

we'll find a place. u into burlesque shows n shit?

u into burlesque shows n shit?


(now we are talking)

it was decent too...like more artistic than raunchy. but i'd much rather go to a show like that than a club.

>going to stockholm for 4 days (max)
>and then a month later i'll be back in london headed to
>kenya.
Vipi dada? Let me know when you're in London and let's finally build.
Peace and blessings.

>Vipi dada? Let me know when you're in London and let's finally
>build.

email yako ni? yangu: nidhamu@gmail

nipe yako na nitakuaeleza lini naja.
nadhani june 21st niko london (masaa kadhaa), lakini nitakuwa nikienda stockholm.

naenda home august- nitapitia huko for a day or two.

tutabonga, au?

I am sorry you have to go through what you have to go through. I am heterosexual..so perhaps I am unable to fully sympathize with your situation..but I try to teach my children about the diversity of our society..and surround them with people who express love in different ways..books like "King and King"..are incorporated equally with all other stories and tales...I accept..and hopefully my children will accept the diversity of the world..I know its hard now..but hopefully as people become more educated..and by persons like yourself sharing your story..perspectives will change..
My minister is a happily committed gay man..and I had the pleasure of attending his "wedding" ceremony..although it wasn't legal..we overrode the "rules" with joy and love that day..and I'm sure this sounds more happy and hopeful than the reality..but I really believe in the next generation..or two..people will be ashamed to be homophobic..or it will be something as embarrasing as being publically racist.

First of all, congratulations on graduating. It is amazing that you have perservered (sp?) through such adversity.

>to the heterosexuals who show love and tolerance...peace.

Thanks.

I didn't see you in my post I made a while back, so let me ask you a couple questions:

1.) No matter how many times it's discussed, I always seem to come to the point of the word "homophobia" indicating some sort of fear. In YOUR opinion, is someone homophobic because they don't agree with every aspect of homosexual life, even if they support your right to live the way you choose to live?

2.) Your love of women as opposed to men - was that a choice, or do you feel you were born that way? Elaborate on either answer...

3.) Do you liken the struggle of being gay to the Civil Rights struggle (as it pertains to blacks being accepted by whites in the 60's)? If so, why? If not, why not?

Thanks in advance for answering...



www.myspace.com/treblemusick - Album coming 2007

www.omniversal.net - It ain't what you doin'...we're a family, not a movement...

tR&B May/June 2007: http://sharebee.com/356046fb

>1.) No matter how many times it's discussed, I always seem to
>come to the point of the word "homophobia" indicating some
>sort of fear. In YOUR opinion, is someone homophobic because
>they don't agree with every aspect of homosexual life, even if
>they support your right to live the way you choose to live?

it is a term used loosely, imo. i agree with the concept because people fear what they don't understand. and fear can breed other emotions...resentment, intolerance, hatred, etc. and i only have a problem when people try to disrupt or disrespect my life. my sister doesn't agree with my sexuality...but everyone has their own opinion and i don't try to force mine on her. i don't consider her homophobic. and even though i know she doesn't agree with my sexuality, she accepts me, loves me, and has often acted as a buffer between my parents and i.

>2.) Your love of women as opposed to men - was that a choice,
>or do you feel you were born that way? Elaborate on either
>answer...

i've always been a tomboy. i've only had one boyfriend, and he was like a best friend, not a boyfriend. we played ball together and played cards for pushups. he broke up with me after four months because he said i was gay...before i really knew myself. i mean, i'm able to find dudes attractive...but i have no desire to have any kind of sexual contact with them. i've never had sex with a man and never wanted to. so i would assume i was born gay. that whole debate is kind of irrelevant to me tho. the fact is i'm a lesbian.


>3.) Do you liken the struggle of being gay to the Civil Rights
>struggle (as it pertains to blacks being accepted by whites in
>the 60's)? If so, why? If not, why not?

people always wanna compare some shit. there are many similarities but i accept the differences. but discrimination is discrimination to me. point blank. and i'm in both of the struggles.

Understanding & respect begins with dialogue and I appreciate your time.

>it is a term used loosely, imo. i agree with the concept
>because people fear what they don't understand. and fear can
>breed other emotions...resentment, intolerance, hatred, etc.
>and i only have a problem when people try to disrupt or
>disrespect my life. my sister doesn't agree with my
>sexuality...but everyone has their own opinion and i don't try
>to force mine on her. i don't consider her homophobic. and
>even though i know she doesn't agree with my sexuality, she
>accepts me, loves me, and has often acted as a buffer between
>my parents and i.

This is what I needed to hear.

Thank you.

>>3.) Do you liken the struggle of being gay to the Civil
>Rights
>>struggle (as it pertains to blacks being accepted by whites
>in
>>the 60's)? If so, why? If not, why not?
>
>people always wanna compare some shit. there are many
>similarities but i accept the differences. but discrimination
>is discrimination to me. point blank. and i'm in both of the
>struggles.

The reason I asked this, is because I made a post a while back, and the main idea of the post was how it angered me that homosexuals compare their struggle to the Civil Rights movement. I theorized that being gay is a choice. I now realize that was kind of disrespectful, but I personally can't comprehend the idea of being born gay, unless you're a hermaphodite.

All of a sudden, for feeling this way, I'm a homophobe.

I don't fear, resent or hate homosexuals, so that theory offended and angered me.

If anything, I feel that you have the right to live the way you choose, as long as it doesn't infringe upon the rights of others. That's only fair.

The same way that I don't choose to look at a whole bunch of naked straight people walkin' around in the street claiming their heterosexuality, is the same way I wouldn't choose to look at a whole bunch of naked homosexuals doing it.

I understand that gatherings of people that have like minds brings comfort and camaraderie, hell, that's why I joined okp (back when everybody on here were fans of The Roots by default - lol); but then too, some of those parades I've seen seem to celebrate the wrong aspects of that life. It gives off the impression that being homosexual is just relentless debauchery...and I don't think it is.

I have a HUGE amount of respect for homosexuals who manage to maintain relationships with their partners for years or decades. As a matter of fact, I've been tryin' to find one of my high school teachers who I believe was gay...she made a real difference in my life as a person and she's been on my mind lately.

So yeah, thanks again for discussing this with me...

U seem to go around and around in a circle with this topic. What answer are u looking for? How much testimony do u need? If a 1000 gay people give u similar answers how many more do u need to reach understanding? Not to offend u but u remind me of the white person that can't seem to shake the notion that black people are as smart as u or feel love like u or hurt like u. The power to step out of yourself and try on life of someone else will set mind free in the end. peace.

When I made that post about homophobia, my attempt was to understand a people and their beliefs, not ridicule them.

My main theory was that I didn't like the term "homophobia" because the deifinition of phobia to me is fear - and I don't fear homosexuals or what they practice. I don't practice it myself, but that doesn't mean I can't coexist with them.

I admit, I brought my religious opinions into the post, but in NO WAY did I condemn homosexuals for their lifestyle. The way Akon attacked me was as if I can't stand gays at all, and I took offense to that...

but on your issue with pride marches suggesting that all of gay life is debauchery...

Freaknik?
Black Bike Week?
Mardi Gras?

straight people wylin' out.

how is that different?

http://fuck-your.blogspot.com
http://www.myspace.com/insightclopediabrown
http://www.myspace.com/dumhi
http://www.youtube.com/group/okayplayer
http://www.last.fm/user/DawgEatah
R.I.P. 3rd i

this kinda hit me because a few days ago i was reading about violence against homosexuals. from john altherton to giovanni di giovanni to matthew shepard.

shits disgusting.

speaking of. i need to call my cousin. i havne't talked ot her in a month.

>61. I can leave a nightclub consisting mostly of people of my
>sexuality
>knowing I will not get harassed or attacked for my sexuality.
>


http://www.myspace.com/thievinstealberg
http://computerstupid.blogspot.com (4/9/07)

thats realer than real...

for real for real...

why do people ride so hard for that which doesnt affect them?

congrats on graduating
i consider myself to be fairly openminded
i know i still have some ways to go

for real,
i appreciate her music in more ways than one.

i mean i always *knew* but the combination of the story + the funk in that song hit me like a ton of bricks...

it would be a waste of bandwidth to hit everyone back individually...but i am appreciative.

and WOW...i didn't know your story. you've alluded to the trouble w/your mother but i didn't know the details. wow! that's all i can say.

and peace to you.

and like akon said, fuck 'em if they don't get it. FUCK 'EM.

and, homie i didn't/couldn't even type the half of it.

okp would shit down if i posted all the torment i've faced in the past 9 years.

...horrible set of situations, and for taking the high road after all of the venom being tossed in the other post.

hug from me when we meet up in NYC.

You are a soldier man. You're story is both terrifying (as i get mentally prepared to have a sit down with my folks) and inspiring.

peace kid.

are your folks open minded?

he's only concerned with how the car's running, hows the job and hows the apartment.

my mom is more on the dramatic side. In the worse case scenario she's likely to call for an extended family(grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles) meeting over something like this. She won't come at me from the "youre going to hell" standpoint but i do worry that she'll go the "why are you doing this to me?!" angle. not looking forward to it.

I do see that nothing that happens could ever be as bad as what you had to go through. That encourages me to be strong(er).

ur dad reminds me of mine.

my mother is the 13th disciple...i was all sorts of demons and abominations. also she feels that everything i do is a reflection of her parenting. and also if she doesn't save my soul, she'll have to answer to God for it.

best wishes...i don't know your to offer any REAL advice, but...best wishes.

and thank you.

thank you.

peace.

thank YOU.

and gay.

A rich man. We think money can buy pretty much anything and I'll tell you the truth -- it has insulated him from a LOT of issues.

But it's still illegal for him to marry. And his money didn't insulate him from the sting of homophobic jokes told at his nephew's rehearsal dinner. His nephew, who loves him and knows that he's gay, but whose friends are the typical hetero-normative "No Homo" rich boys.

A very good friend who died of AIDS in the early 90s was also from a very very wealthy family. He died destitute, because his father cut him off when he found out Roger was gay.

I know this isn't exactly on point, but in light of some of the posts from yesterday about wealth/income and race, I thought this might add something to the conversation.

i missed yesterday's posts, but what you're saying is true. i've rekindled the relationship with my mother...but only on a limited basis. i KNOW she'll never accept me for who i am. no matter what, she'll never be TRULY proud of me because i love women. my degree, or any kind of money won't change that.

I'm straight, but my mother was an alcoholic and so our relationship was very, very difficult.
When I told my mother I was becoming a nun, she told me not to do it.
When I wrote to her and told her I was leaving the monastery, she wrote back and said stay there.
When I told her I was getting married, she said not to do it.
When I told her I was getting divorced, she said not to do it.

Not to mention the fact that when my sister converted to Judaism to marry, my mother was completely freaked out, and when I was seriously involved with a Black man, my mother was completely freaked out.

Now, I happen to have in hand the awareness that she really just thought she was trying to help, but knowing that doesn't make it a whole lot easier.

But I really believe that the number of people who have strong and positive relationships with their mothers is much much smaller than you and I think. I think because we have shitty relationships with them, we tend to see other people's mothers through rose-colored glasses.

I think what I'm trying to say here is that there's a great likelihood that if your mother is the kind of person who withholds love because she doesn't approve of your sexual orientation, then even if you were heterosexual, she would find a way to withhold love from you. I know you know this, but let me just underscore it: Don't let her disapproval affect your own self-image. We can't do it, you and I and PungeePyPy who wrote yesterday about his mother not believing that he was in his studio until 3 am and all the rest of us on the boards who have mother problems. If we let our mothers' views of us deeply affect us, they will seriously fuck up our lives and our relationships.

Sending you lots of positive energy. xxoo

it took a lot of counseling to be able to see things objectively. it doesn't make the situation itself any easier...but it does help in how i react to the situation.

thank u for the positivity...

WWW.PEOPLECANCHANGE.COM

you look like a man on your myspace page. what the fuck is the white man putting in the food and water?

but wait, he's drunk.

peace boo :)

but i appreciate what you wrote. so many of us have to deal with shit like this everyday.

also, i know right now it seems as though your mom does not love you but i would be willing to wager that it's not you but her own issues that she is dealing with. i always try to pply the devils advocate so i will say this: don't let the anger you feel for the way your mom acted make you dislike or hate her, instead think about what she must have been though or is going through in her life and mind to make her treat her daughter in that way. she obviously is dealing with her own demons and this is in no way an attempt to excuse her actions cause she is wrong. just see it from another view. hurting people hurt people.

please!

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June 22, 2007 ~ Two Become One

DROkayplayer: I'm a Professional Weed Smoker. Not because of how MUCH weed I smoke, but because of how WELL I smoke it.

I regard myself as pretty aware and open mindede - I don't personally have any issues at all with LGBTQ people. But reading that story and just thinking of having to defend myself against that everyday and not even have my parents in my corner...man. Keep on doing what you do girl.

gay folks run this town.

and ill set you up with a home delivery service that would knock your socks off.

seriously though, why not move to an environment more tolerant of homosexuality?

than all the pain you've had to endure..

blessings to you.. forreal.

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that has helped greatly. and thank u.

I could relate to your story a little
all of that only makes us stronger. peace

Peace to you.
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I'm so famous.(c) Joi
www.myspace.com/heavenleiblumoon

Sorry this is happened to you, you know, it sucks. But you must be one strong person 2 get through it all. Respect.

beautiful said.

"Everywhere I rest I get treated like a King, I'm the sire here...you can read it in 'em cards, the FIRE's here..." (c) Jay Electronica

Blog: www.abenghorn.net/Heat.html
Myspace: www.myspace.com/abenghorn

especially by your "church going" parents

love the sinner, hate the sin. people always forget that.

how is your relationship with your folks now? does it exist at all?

after i officially came out to my mother, she started with the denial. often she thanks God for my deliverance and tells me how God told her He was sending me a husband, etc.

i've tried to tell her that i'm still gay and she won't listen. "i don't receive that, i don't receive that..." but at the same time she'll freak out if i come by with braids.

so to keep a relationship with her, i compromise. i try to understand that all she has is God and church, she's never going to change, so i have to be the bigger person. and that means i tailor my clothes, conversation, and appearance to appease her when i'm around her. if she happens to start fussing, i leave.

my sister is a great help, tho. she often will intercept bs from my mother before it gets to me.

parents and friends who think the cure-all for homosexuality is sending someone to church.. its the equivalent of sending a child molestor to the Neverland ranch

FUCK THE 700 CLUB
AND FUCK PAT ROBERSON

....mybad, just venting

keep ya head up and your eyes focused on your future...

Dee