I. Week 12 Recap

I think this is the first week that everyone scored in triple digits, nice work guys.

One Sixteen 171.48, Yahoo Public League Also Rans 111.14 – Shells’ postseason hopes take a serious hit from my team’s scoring the 2nd highest point total this season

Bernard Jarvis Green Ellis LLC 110.06, NYU Football 102.96 – Ceej squeaks by Smuts to extend his win streak and stay in first place

AM GoHards 139.86, mad science 109.44 – Ernie’s team is getting hot just at the right time, Matt cements his spot in the Ass Bracket

The Brain Heenans 120.92, Vanessa Lane Bryant 120.88 – Cere is the lucky one, getting one of the closest wins in Blowhards history over Shawn, who can now say he’s truly justified in making those keeper trades

The ProfessionaLLLLs 114.90, Harbor City Whoo-Ride 102.46 – Good thing Pro played Coolidge this week

Super Generic Team Name IV 135.20, Imbruglia These Nutz 133.42 – Too little too late for Longo as Will gives him a ticket to join him in the Conso Bracket



II. Playoff Picture
1. Ceej
2. Myself
Both of us are pretty much locks to get in, and can clinch with wins this weekend.

3. Pro
Pro is also pretty much a lock, just needs to win these last 2 games.

4. Ernie
5. Cere
With both of these guys having the same record, if they both win out it will come down to the tiebreaker which is points scored. Ernie has about a 40 point lead on Cere so far, so winning with high scores is crucial for both of these guys the next 2 weeks

6. Shelly
Professor is down but not mathematically out, he can get in if he wins out but he’s going to need help from Ernie or Cere to drop their next two, as he won’t be able to beat them with the tiebreaker since his total points are too low.



III. Hindsight is 20/20

From bshelly (Week 1 Update/Week 2 Preview post):
Why THE PROFESSIONALS shouldn’t get cocky: Admit it, dog. I could offer you Pierre Thomas for half your team and you’d have to say yes. You have wife-beater karma and will until you make a four-figure donation to now AND wear pink all October. You need to do what I did: let other people endure the years of bad karma for having a woman hating psychopath, then scoop in when the karma’s exhausted itself. Anyway, this team is two studs and hot garbage.

Should the HARBOR CITY WHOO RIDE panic: Nope. Of all the losers, Warren had the best week. Kelvin Benjamin is officially frisky, Steve Smith is officially alive, and any owner who wants a serviceable running back has to start shopping with a call to the Harbor City. If he can work a Rivers platoon with a suddenly frisky Tannehill, Warren Cooldige gonna finish ahead of all y’all jive turkeys 1nce again…lololol….


From Warren Coolidge (Week 1 Preview post):
you've seen this movie before sara.... Warren Coolidge builds depth....has the highest scoring DST (Bears a couple years ago..last year the Panthers).... Flips scripts to put a WR corp together (picking up Victor Cruz BEFORE he had his first NFL reception....lol..come on man... you can't fukk wit me...lol.... then last year Edelman and Riley Cooper.... )

That's the formula that finishes ahead of you in the standings sara....

you see it every year...


From TheProfessional (Week 1 Update/Week 2 Preview post)
looking around the league, warren's team is better than we thought it was, KC's team is worse than we thought it was (thanks in part to getting hammered with bad breaks early), and shells and sarah have nowhere to go but down. starting allen hurns in week 1 is indeed an act of desperation and generally a bad omen for the future, even though it ended up working out, so that's settled. dropping 38 bills on justin forsett is also a bad sign. and, ceej, in case you were wondering, adrian peterson was one of the players on my do not draft list. kept that one on the low 'cause i didn't want you handcuffing him. be nicer to me and next year i'll give you my list before the draft.


From Warren Coolidge (Week 4 Update/Week 5 Preview post)
you need to take a page from sorry ass Ernie…See…Ernie knows when to shut the fukk up…. Remember all that shit that was talked?? I’m 1-3 and he ain’t saying shit now because he knows he’s a couple of weeks from being passed in the whoo-ride in the standing …..again….and those worst WRs in the league turned out to be as good a set of WRs any team has…
its’ called acumen gentlemen…
write it down..


From Matt (Week 5 Update/Week 6 Preview post):
no punt buddy…
although its not a great deal, i think B.T. is actually #1 level, and when he gets hurt again I have crow. I had nothing resembling a #1 back and they are hard to come by. Also, I believe Sankey will come through soon (famous last words), and colston is a fine #2 WR. Now I can play Russ and when Ingram returns I actually have some power at RB... i'm trying to make lemons.. sometimes energy just needs to be shifted
(said after trading Rodgers/Fred Jackson/V. Cruz for Ben Tate/B. Sankey/M. Colston)


From Shawn (Week 5 Update/Week 6 Preview post):
This is Tecmo Bowl. Fuck punting. We all might be dead next year.


From cereffusion (Week 8 Update/Week 9 Preview post):
kc's team is a fraud and everyone knows it


From cereffusion (Week 9 Update post):
Let’s be real – KC’s team did not deserve to be 7-1 coming in at 10th in points against. With the loss he drops into second place and 6th overall in points scored. Don’t be shocked to see a quick fall here with a strong chance he falls outside out of the playoffs. Meanwhile, some guy named Shawn has risen from the grave to win four in a row and suddenly become a contender. The two-headed monster of Foster/Charles is scary but his QBs and WRs are middling at best. That said – he has Gronk so big points will always be a threat.



IV. Week 13 Preview

GAME OF THE WEEK
Ceej v Cere – Cere needs this win bad to keep playoff hopes alive, Ceej wants to continue his winning streak and hold on first place

OTHER GAMES OF NOTE
None, everyone is either trying to play spoiler or trying to keep their postseason hopes alive. Happy Hunger Games, and may the odds be ever in your favor.....



We the children of the Light, you know what I mean?
That's why I'm hating on the darkness like Paula Deen
Cause in my hood they masked up like it's Halloween
We going hard for the Rock, but we not some fiends
- Andy Mineo

He trails both Ernie and I in points - a loss this week could drop him in into 5th.

And, I love the hindsight but you forgot two of my favorite ones:

1) My team being ranked 11th in the preseason and,
2) Ernie popping off about Shelly losing with Ben's 6TDs only to do the same thing right after that.

Pay attention.

>2) Ernie popping off about Shelly losing with Ben's 6TDs only
>to do the same thing right after that.

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Get it together.

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ernie learned not to pop off about things so much because they could happen to him.

L

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don't see any sort of comparison between popping off over 50fp but losing with 49?

L.

The fact you keep posting about it lets me know it stings a little how quickly that backfired on you as an agenda.

No, not much sting.

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are the things you talk about the most

Then pretend you didnt.

Enjoy the conso bracket.

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add up the % of your posts in the last 2 updates that are specifically and adoringly about me.

This back and forth in this VERY post is because you couldnt not mention me. Just focus on the conso bracket. Last thing I'll say about your team, I think you have a very good shot at winning said conso bracket. Your have a good team. Good luck.

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you write a love letter to me and you trying to flip it? cmon man.

we should really be focusing on both of us jumping hofessional because that'd be the most funny.

n/h

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going through the posts this year was pretty funny.....



We the children of the Light, you know what I mean?
That's why I'm hating on the darkness like Paula Deen
Cause in my hood they masked up like it's Halloween
We going hard for the Rock, but we not some fiends
- Andy Mineo

as i said in the last post, take a look at my roster. it's been under construction and hampered by bye weeks for about a month or so, but this is what a fully armed and operational death star looks like. this team isn't losing again this year, and i'm very likely gonna take the points crown as well. which means you and ernie either need a complete collapse from one of the top two teams or you're duking it out for one spot.

"i smack clowns with nouns, punch herbs with verbs..."

> and i'm very likely gonna take the points crown as well.

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"i smack clowns with nouns, punch herbs with verbs..."

that really the stand you want to take?

you sure were a quiet fellow during those 6 weeks of mediocrity.

you're bad at math and even worse at remembering things that happened. ernie said there was a zero percent chance of me taking the points title. considering i put up 180+ this week and only need to outscore him by 48 points, the odds are obviously not zero. i'll say it's about 50/50, maybe better.

as for your memory, you're confusing me with ceej. check the receipts, i've been here every week, rain or shine. new rookie, on the other hand, has been quietly fading the past few weeks as he realizes his team isn't good and no child beaters are coming to rescue it.

"i smack clowns with nouns, punch herbs with verbs..."

Twice in the past two months. Never by more than 12. I've outscored you by 40+ several times though. Your math sucks.

> ernie said there was a zero percent chance of me
>taking the points title. considering i put up 180+ this week
>and only need to outscore him by 48 points, the odds are
>obviously not zero. i'll say it's about 50/50, maybe better.


I clinched the points title two weeks ago.

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>I clinched the points title two weeks ago.
>

http://i.imgur.com/vPqCzVU.jpg

pro is about 2 sentences away from an earl bennett right now.

Please keep bringing up AP tho

http://i.imgur.com/vPqCzVU.jpg

I thought that was mad science?

>I thought that was mad science?

http://i.imgur.com/vPqCzVU.jpg

you suck at this.

Past 6 weeks - breakdown is 27-39.

But yeah. That's because of all those bye weeks over the past month...

oops.

"i smack clowns with nouns, punch herbs with verbs..."

you really taking a page from ernie and popping off after your first good week in a month and a half?

cmon man.

seriously. cmon.

showing up once a week to complain about these endless 'byes' isn't a good look.

and you call what you do 'analysis?' Constantly yelling about 'y u no draft yulio jones?' over and over is just annoying.

'y u do draft drew brees 8th overall?' Thanks for Calvin AND Jimmy and the considerably better Andrew Luck. Y U NO DRAFT ANDREW LUCK?

you've been knocking my draft all year, yet here i am in the executive lounge while your squad isn't even in the building. is it cold outside, sarah? would you like me to bring you one of these complimentary cashmere monogrammed robes from the closet?

"i smack clowns with nouns, punch herbs with verbs..."

don't lose because it'd be a shame if you ended up in 5th place because you don't have the points.

High scoring week

----
bshelly

"You (Fisher) could get fired, Les Snead could get fired, Kevin Demoff could get fired, but I will always be Eric Dickerson.” (c) The God

Harbor City Whoo-Ride added Ray Rice RB and dropped Andre Johnson WR - HOU
7 hours ago via Mobile Device


Way to cap off the worst managed season in league history.

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I was gonna plug in Fitz if he was inactive but then Fitz turned up inactive too. Neither would have made a difference seeing how the rest of my team played today.....




We the children of the Light, you know what I mean?
That's why I'm hating on the darkness like Paula Deen
Cause in my hood they masked up like it's Halloween
We going hard for the Rock, but we not some fiends
- Andy Mineo

I don't think anyone can clinch this week.

Barring Ceej averaging 31.10 over his last three players or Peyton outscoring the Denver D by 81-ish - we'll have a three way tie at 9-4 with Ceej, KC, and Hof.

Ernie and I will be one game back but have a points advantage on everyone (I'll be up ~6 on Hof and trailing Ernie by ~42).

Next week:

Ernie v Frank
Hof v Shawn
Ceej v Will
KC v Mad Science
Me v Smuts

Or the Redux.

>
>
>Next week:
>
>Ernie v Frank

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And we're on entirely different levels so I dont understand how his mind works, but can someone theorize his moves this week, notably the Ray non keeper Rice pickup? Was that a symbolic move? Is the acumen so deep I just dont get it?

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Looking like another epic Blowhards Week 14.

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all of my favorites involve kc's 'locks' not making it.

my next favorites are just I make it and you don't.

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#teamsmuts

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I'm not overly concerned about mine.

Ceej was projected to win by 30...Graham put up a 0...this shit ain't easy to predict on a weekly basis.

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as i said, all i had to do was survive my bye weeks. after that, it was always gonna be cruise control to the 'offs.

"i smack clowns with nouns, punch herbs with verbs..."

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and even if i don't, i still have approximately 37 different ways in. so... yeah, i know what clinched means. did it two weeks ago, thanks. in the executive lounge sipping piping hot cocoa while you're outside sitting on a cold wet bubble.

"i smack clowns with nouns, punch herbs with verbs..."

> so... yeah, i know what clinched means.

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although it's somewhat amusing to see Ernie and cere argue about each other's pending collapse.

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You were relevant once, no?

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bshelly

"You (Fisher) could get fired, Les Snead could get fired, Kevin Demoff could get fired, but I will always be Eric Dickerson.” (c) The God

i know a few of you have been asking for it for a while now, and those numbers just came in. just crunched them on the executive lounge workstation while skimming through a complimentary edition of the wall street journal and sipping on some freshly squeezed orange juice with my pinky out. also, wanted to thank you guys for keeping the lounge clean over the past few weeks and not changing the favorite channels i had programmed into the remote. that was classy of you, considering you won't be back.

"i smack clowns with nouns, punch herbs with verbs..."

you should read more.

"i smack clowns with nouns, punch herbs with verbs..."