23. "Is there a franchise with less internal logic? " In response to Reply # 0
Hey, let's replicate dinosaurs. Tons of them. Even the real toothy nasty predatory ones. It'll be a gas, we'll make it a park, your kids will love it.
*Shit goes horribly wrong*
Hey, let's just create a preserve where these artificially bred dinosaurs can just live and breed freely even with their genetic unpredictability, and not cordon the motherfucker off and let people stumble upon the joint randomly.
*Shit goes horribly wrong*
Hey, let's replicate dinosaurs. Tons of them. Even the real toothy nasty predatory ones. It'll be a gas, we'll make it a park, your kids will love it. -AGAIN. Cause all that previous death and destruction just wasn't enough.
*Shit goes horribly wrong*
Hey, remember all those huge death dealing dinosaurs we made? They're in trouble cause a volcano could basically wipe all them out and solve all of our problems. No sirree! We gotta save them and bring them to mainland America! Cause that's just a good idea!
*Shit will inevitably go horribly wrong I'm sure. Hey, we got another trilogy to complete!*
Plus evil corporations actually want to use dinosaurs to fight future wars, cause y'know, controlling dinosaurs has been a breeze so far, right?
Frank Longo Member since Nov 18th 2003 86672 posts
Fri Jun-22-18 02:19 AM
30. "^^^ shit, this comment saw the future" In response to Reply # 26
I left the movie today thinking I could write a thesis on how the Jurassic World sequels are meta-commentaries on what Hollywood does with successful franchise-worthy properties.
I thought/hoped that by changing the name to Jurassic World, there was the slight chance that they would ditch the theme park stuff and maybe go into the long-term dinosaur problem that was set in motion by the first film. But nope! Jurassic World was a reboot, just like this looks like a reboot of Lost World--thankfully without Vince Vaughn, at least.
Frank Longo Member since Nov 18th 2003 86672 posts
Fri Jun-22-18 02:23 AM
31. "Sadly, it's goofy without being nearly goofy enough." In response to Reply # 0
If you're going to make it as goofy as this movie is conceptually, then you have to fucking GO FOR IT. More on-screen deaths would've helped. Make Rafe Spall compete with Toby Jones's scenery chewing. More goofy hero zingers. Maybe exploit the silly granddaughter plot twist more.
Instead, the goofiest shit mostly exists in the periphery as the movie focuses on impressively-shot but relatively forgettable action. My favorite action: a tranquilized Chris Pratt trying to escape lava. SILLY! FUN! They set up a lot of fun stuff but then kept cutting away. Show me that head butting dinosaur fucking people up more. Show me more lava melting and crushing bad guys. Show me more of the Indo-Raptor hunting businessmen! MORE FUCKING TOBY JONES!
Rampage did similar things but a *lot* better. This movie is better shot than the first, and there are, as expected, a few nice moments/decent set pieces, but... yeah.
The third movie promises to be by FAR the silliest yet, but if they aren't fucking GOING FOR IT-- push for as close to an R rating as you can get!-- then it'll be just another waste.
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