2. "hard to say. " In response to Reply # 0 Tue Feb-12-19 04:45 PM by tariqhu
my daughter is 14. no real issues. she's not into boys or other dumb stuff lol.
she's been more outspoken at home, but not in a bad way. just talking more and not being as quiet.
our biggest issue has really been how she looks and cares for herself. she's not big into looks, which is mostly a good thing. but on some days, like picture day, she'll where whatever and be cheesing in the pic.
she also typically rocks and afro. sometimes is just a ball of hair and not well taken care of.
she's been a model citizen. no real complaints about my teenager. still getting straight A's. we good.
edit: If there's one piece of advice, stay close to her as she becomes more independent.
4. "This part is important" In response to Reply # 2
>edit: >If there's one piece of advice, stay close to her as she >becomes more independent.
I have to find time to spend with my daughter now. Her schedule is busy.
There's also the hard part of not taking it personal when they start asserting their independence and wanting to hang out with friends instead of family (which happens more and more). You gotta loosen the reigns while still reinforcing family ties.
In a generation of swine, the one-eyed pig is king. -Hunter S. Thompson
3. "keep her time occupied and her self esteem high" In response to Reply # 0
My daughter is 17 now and she's been awesome. Boys havent been a huge issue. Driving is scary as fuck. navigating college waters is kind of a trip.
As far as the relationship goes, just be the grown up and try not to take her teenage shit personal.
Ex - The other day I offered my daughter some food that I'd cooked. Her response was "Why would you even offer me that? You know i don't like ochra". I had to play it cool like "I offered it to you to be polite, and next time I offer you better respond with the same politeness. A simple 'No Thank You' does the trick". You can't play the punk, but you also don't want to be catching every grenade they lob your direction.
Most of the time she's hella sweet, and fun to hang out with.
In a generation of swine, the one-eyed pig is king. -Hunter S. Thompson
6. "my daughter will sometimes do that." In response to Reply # 3
yup, just be the adult, let them know, and it normally fixes itself.
my child has issues with people skills. she's not always sure what to say in basic situations. sometimes the response she gives is cold. she's not intentionally being mean, but she gets awkward on things that seem simple to me.
8. "how are you handling 'the phone'?" In response to Reply # 0
I have to remind myself that my daughter's world will be waaay different from mine. Trying to manage what I see as 'connectivity overkill' is a real challenge.
They don't 'go get on the phone' like WE used to. The phone is ALWAYS THERE.
- being good cop to her mom's bad cop (both sides are needed)
- understanding she'll be self-absorbed one day and need a self-esteem boost the next
- having a knot in your stomach anytime she is dating, and treating every male in high school as a potential terrorist threat to your fundamental beliefs
- realizing that nothing you say matters if you don't make time for the JV/varsity games, the recitals, the days she's bored and wants to go somewhere ($), the life moments...it can all slip through your fingers and you never get that time back
- spending lots of money that you never expected, even with your most careful planning and "fatherly standards"
- at random times, an overwhelming sadness/aching in your heart that your little girl is just a memory and she is soon to be a woman
- and knowing the above, spoiling the shit out of her whenever you get a chance
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