"Man Law: Your boy sees your girl out at the club. "
They chat and chop it up for a minute. Isn't there some unspoken rule that next time you see your boy he is suppose to say "hey man I saw your old lady at such and such"?
Not suggesting anything improper happened between any of the parties involved. But you just suppose to say that right?
I mean it would be light weight weird not to mention that you ran into your lady right?
********** "Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson
"If she's not fully immersed into The Crew, then yes."
Like if I haven't really spent that much time in her presence.
But my old roommate's wife is sort of part of the crew now. If I saw her out I wouldn't feel the need to report back to my old roommate each time.
The one exception is if I see her in a really unusual place, or far away from home, or something, like if we randomly ran into each other in Paris, or something. That's too noteworthy not to be logged in.
2. "If she's not fully immersed into The Crew, then yes." In response to Reply # 0
Like if I haven't really spent that much time in her presence.
But my old roommate's wife is sort of part of the crew now. If I saw her out I wouldn't feel the need to report back to my old roommate each time.
The one exception is if I see her in a really unusual place, or far away from home, or something, like if we randomly ran into each other in Paris, or something. That's too noteworthy not to be logged in.
4. "yeah thats true, but if you in a city with many clubs/spots, and you don..." In response to Reply # 2
see her there regularly, then it should be mentioned.
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
3. "yep, you gotta mention it...especially since ya'll chopped it up for a b..." In response to Reply # 0
if you just happen to see her and never spoke to her or something, then sure no biggie, don't mention it.
But if you did talk to her, then yeah, you should mention it next time ya'll are speaking.
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
7. "i'm friends with my friends ladies so...yeah " In response to Reply # 0
because we would end up chopping it up for a good amount of time before parting ways
then later when talking to the friend it would be "yeah _____ said the funniest thing when I saw them at ______"
i have caught a friends ex cheating and I said nothing. you are supposed to say nothing and let that shit come out naturally because shit always comes out naturally.
10. "that's a man code violation right there. " In response to Reply # 7
>i have caught a friends ex cheating and I said nothing. you >are supposed to say nothing and let that shit come out >naturally because shit always comes out naturally.
********** "Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
12. "Yep! Ain't none of my business. " In response to Reply # 7
>i have caught a friends ex cheating and I said nothing. you are supposed to say nothing and let that shit come out naturally because shit always comes out naturally.
Say something to the homie. Then, you become the odd one out when he decides he ain't going nowhere. And she ain't letting you come around again or hang with the homie because she now can't stand you. Ain't none of my business.
48. "yep, stay out of grown folks business..." In response to Reply # 12
>>i have caught a friends ex cheating and I said nothing. you >are supposed to say nothing and let that shit come out >naturally because shit always comes out naturally. > >Say something to the homie. Then, you become the odd one out >when he decides he ain't going nowhere. And she ain't letting >you come around again or hang with the homie because she now >can't stand you. Ain't none of my business.
>i have caught a friends ex cheating and I said nothing. you are >supposed to say nothing and let that shit come out naturally because >shit always comes out naturally.
43. "and undoubtedly both of them get mad at YOU." In response to Reply # 7
>i have caught a friends ex cheating and I said nothing. you >are supposed to say nothing and let that shit come out >naturally because shit always comes out naturally.
"ehh bruh, I'm not saying she cheating or stepping on toes but I saw ole girl with some joker the other day...You my nigga so I just wanted to give you the heads up"
my nigga.. what kind of friend are you?
so if your SO was cheating you wouldn't want your friend to tell you? just have you looking like a chump thinking you got a good one?
Nah.. with friends like that.
**************** TBH the fact that you're even a mod here fits squarely within Jag's narrative of OK-sanctioned aggression, bullying, and toxicity. *shrug*
8. "What about your lady mentioning it first?" In response to Reply # 0
Or is that assumed? Cuz if you saw your boy a week later but in the mean time your lady HADN'T mentioned "Oh I saw X at the club" then that would be a lil suspect
Like it should come up in response to "How was the club last night?"
16. "Ima let'eem know off GP!" In response to Reply # 0
On some transparency shit. 'specially if I chopped it up wit'er 'cus if dat shit come from *her later on down the line, 1st thing ya man gon' do is be like:
Word? o_O...Say Bruh, how come you aint tell me you saw my girl at_______?
And if he insecure, he gonna think you was dirty-mackin. So on some forest-for-the-trees shit, put it out dere on some C.Y.A. shit!
"You can take an African out of Africa, but you can't take Africa out of the African" Afro-Americana/Afro-Caribbana/Afro-Latino unite. We are ALL Black!
17. "Unless something happened, no. Don't care either way. " In response to Reply # 0
If nothing improper took place it's completely immaterial. I'm not so paranoid that I'm going to freak out if he didn't give me a detailed report and I find out they spoke.
The biggest reason is that this isn't a scenario worth remembering, let alone discussing. I don't see where "man law" enters the picture in that situation unless you're crazy insecure and/or reeeeeeally need people to know you're a real man.
The one situation where I do think it applies is this:
One of groomsmen was engaged to my supervisor last year. We all worked together and they started dating years before before she became my sup. He and I Are tight enough that we're each a go-to for the more serious life issues we go through, relationships especially.
Anyhow he's not the easiest dude to deal with and she asks me to lunch one day to pick my brain. I told her to let me talk to him first. He was 100% cool because he trusts me and my judgment. I'm one of his few friends who will actually hold him accountable and not just take his side on everything and that plus a similar upbringing was why she came to me.
Anyhow for about 6 months I was in the middle of their relationship issues with each picking my brain about the other. He knew full well me and his girl discussed him and he never once asked what we discussed.
The one thing I told each of them was that I wasn't going to betray anyone's trust and wasn't going to run and tell the other and that my loyalty was clearly with him so she couldn't bring anything to the table that would compromise that.
I wound up violating this rule about two months after they got married. He was explaining a really bad fight they had and a red at came up and I told him something she said that made this incident seem a little off and that he needed to evaluate the situation based on that added intel.
He's big on this manly man code shit but to my surprise he was 100% ok with it. I just wanted to see them win and I did my best to be an even keeled third party.
So in a situation like that...*good friend* law kicked in and I asked if he was cool with me talking to her about him.
But running into each other in a club? Doesn't even register as anything that needs to be discussed.
21. "dude you went from violating man law to abandoning common sense." In response to Reply # 20
>Anyhow for about 6 months I was in the middle of their relationship issues with each picking my brain about the other.
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
24. "Nah, I was being a good friend. " In response to Reply # 21
Funny how they came to *me* for advice and don't really give two fucks about your opinion.
But no... You're the one who gets to tell people what works for them because you think everyone must rigidly abide by all these wack ass "rules" and "codes".
26. "yes i think people should abide by common sense." In response to Reply # 24
*shrug*
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
29. "nah i know some folks don't have common sense. " In response to Reply # 28
I still laugh when i see it nonetheless.
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
32. "i know *this* don't work. Good luck with all that smh." In response to Reply # 31
>Anyhow for about 6 months I was in the middle of their relationship issues with each picking my brain about the other.
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
34. "Lmao who are you to tell me it doesn't work? This was written in past te..." In response to Reply # 32 Fri Mar-17-17 04:34 PM by Cold Truth
No "luck" needed. They're doing just fine right now as is my relationship with them.
But somehow you know more about the nature of my personal relationships and outcome of experiences than I do, right?
Like I said.... You think you can apply your personal boundaries to everyone else.
Your arrogant ass ego won't let you accept that people can do things that you wouldn't and things can work out perfectly fine.
"Different strokes for different" folks is a thing.
I can't imagine the sort of outsized ego it takes to think otherwise. You're the kind of guy who sees "conventional wisdom" as "absolute and inviolate law of existence".
>I'm making fun of the long windedness and Spock like analysis more than your actual position.
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
35. "Hey, don't judge a book by it's cover. " In response to Reply # 30
>I'll be sure to keep it stupid & simple from now on, boss > >In fact I'll write out a few of the same cliche ass catch all >replies and just do a paste job 😃 > >
********** "Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson
19. "jeezus what the hell did i just read." In response to Reply # 17
-The Knicks’ coaching search still includes a lone frontrunner, Kurt Rambis, whose qualifications for the position include a strong relationship with Jackson and a willingness to take the job.
38. "Ask Cenario. He seems to know how every choice will always play out for ..." In response to Reply # 37 Fri Mar-17-17 06:36 PM by Cold Truth
Because human relationships are binary and there is no nuance or complexity and anyone who doesn't rigidly do things in ways that make sense to him is surely doomed.
Since Cenario isn't the all seeing, all knowing seer he thinks he is, I'll answer.
Yes, they're still married and everything is going well.
42. "I stay out of it...period" In response to Reply # 0
because in the back of HIS mind it turns into 'why is he worried about where my girl is?'
and if she gets word that you told on her ( especially if she wasn't doing anything wrong), you're a hatin ass snitch.
You can't win. I just keave it alone unless he asks. and even THEN, I keep it vanilla. "She might've been there. I dunno. I was caught up with such-and-such"
44. "RE: I stay out of it...period!!!!" In response to Reply # 42
>because in the back of HIS mind it turns into 'why is he >worried about where my girl is?' > >and if she gets word that you told on her ( especially if she >wasn't doing anything wrong), you're a hatin ass snitch. > > >You can't win. I just keave it alone unless he asks. and even >THEN, I keep it vanilla. "She might've been there. I dunno. I >was caught up with such-and-such"
Ain't no need to say a word. Eventually it will come out and your boy gonna do what he's gonna do regardless. Ain't none of my business!
46. "Sidepost: why are grown folks 'telling' anyway?" In response to Reply # 44
> >Ain't no need to say a word. Eventually it will come out and >your boy gonna do what he's gonna do regardless. Ain't none of >my business! >
Say word.
Also, I'm not the night watchman of anybody's relationship. If people feel they have to tell on folks or be told about their S.O., then maybe some folks are dating the wrong types of people.
I won't let anybody make a fool of my dude, but unless I'm involved directly? It ain't my business.
47. "Indeed! People know who they're dealing with anyway..." In response to Reply # 46
>Also, I'm not the night watchman of anybody's relationship. If >people feel they have to tell on folks or be told about their >S.O., then maybe some folks are dating the wrong types of >people. > >I won't let anybody make a fool of my dude, but unless I'm >involved directly? It ain't my business. > >
Some choose to bury their heads and act like they don't see it.
I've seen it happen. A friend tells his boy that he's seen said boy's lady out in the club dancing and all up on another dude. The lady then flips it and makes it seem like the friend is just jealous because he took a shot and missed. Shit goes haywire from there. The dudes ain't friends no more and the homie is still with the lady.
back in the day, a buddy of mine was doing his thing. We ran them DC streets together. His wife had an idea of what he was doing. She figured she'd get back at him by approaching me. At that point, I had to say something because that was a violation straight up and down. She felt justified because she believed he was doing his thing. prolly wanted to hurt him by coming for his boy. No pun intended.
It was foul of her to do that. In the end, they remained a married couple (with their family) and I fell back from kicking it with my boy out of respect for his marriage. My ex and I had just gone our separate way. By and large, I was a single dude at that point. We couldn't be cool in her presence anymore because it would cause problems for their relationship. Then, and only then, would I open my mouth to say something.
Being involved (by telling on grown-ups) in someone else's marriage/relationship ain't nothing that I want any parts of.
>Some choose to bury their heads and act like they don't see >it. > >I've seen it happen. A friend tells his boy that he's seen >said boy's lady out in the club dancing and all up on another >dude. The lady then flips it and makes it seem like the friend >is just jealous because he took a shot and missed. Shit goes >haywire from there. The dudes ain't friends no more and the >homie is still with the lady. > >back in the day, a buddy of mine was doing his thing. We ran >them DC streets together. His wife had an idea of what he was >doing. She figured she'd get back at him by approaching me. At >that point, I had to say something because that was a >violation straight up and down. She felt justified because she >believed he was doing his thing. prolly wanted to hurt him by >coming for his boy. No pun intended. > >It was foul of her to do that. In the end, they remained a >married couple (with their family) and I fell back from >kicking it with my boy out of respect for his marriage. My ex >and I had just gone our separate way. By and large, I was a >single dude at that point. We couldn't be cool in her presence >anymore because it would cause problems for their >relationship. Then, and only then, would I open my mouth to >say something. > >Being involved (by telling on grown-ups) in someone else's >marriage/relationship ain't nothing that I want any parts of. >
I ain't snitching just telling my boy I saw his girl and chopped it up for a few.. why lie or omit?
Nothing to hide.
**************** TBH the fact that you're even a mod here fits squarely within Jag's narrative of OK-sanctioned aggression, bullying, and toxicity. *shrug*
Printer-friendly copy 
Email this topic to a friend
General Discussion
