"Y'all got that friend who talks reckless about their SO and then...."
Show up with them like everything is hunkydory?
I mean how can you go on and on about how terrible they are and how you are going to leave them (even divorce talk) and then call up and be like "Hey Y'all want to do couples night?!!!"
Keep your personal business private, or if you reconcile you got to say "Hey, I was talking reckless when I said all that ish..."
But how do they do the thing where they just want to act like none of that happen?
Are they hoping we forgot?
For all you folks in here that do that you should know we did not forget and we are clowning you behind your back.
Either keep it to yourself or be prepared to look silly when you stay.
That's all.
********** "Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson
Movies I need y'all bastids to see so we can discuss:
You could realize that's just sometimes part of being human and in relationships and let that ish go.
I've learned to let people vent and do them.
That's why I never shit on someone's SO/fling/whatever when they're unhappy but so much, cause I know they are probably going to get back together. ______________________________________________________________________________
cscpov.blogspot.com
"There's a fine line between persistence and foolishness..." -unknown
8. "yup...my brother used to do this with his ex...i learned" In response to Reply # 1
>That's why I never shit on someone's SO/fling/whatever when >they're unhappy but so much, cause I know they are probably >going to get back together.
i basically never said anything about her cause i knew they were always hot and cold...when they finally broke up for good i just breathed a sigh of relief
4. "Yes I do..." In response to Reply # 0 Tue Sep-15-15 03:22 PM by JellyBean
it's always someone whom you haven't had the opportunity to form your own opinions about...
my friend is famous for this! I told her how is anybody supposed to believe you're with a good dude if all you do is talk bad about him? And you wonder why people look at you crazy for staying with said dude. We ain't never heard of ANYTHING good this guy does for you!
"Holier than thou never sits well with me."(c)janey
"OKP spends way too much time looking for ways to be offended." ~legsdiamond
15. "Is your friend dating Terrance Howard?" In response to Reply # 4
>my friend is famous for this! I told her how is anybody >supposed to believe you're with a good dude if all you do is >talk bad about him? And you wonder why people look at you >crazy for staying with said dude. We ain't never heard of >ANYTHING good this guy does for you!
legsdiamond Member since May 05th 2011 79586 posts
Tue Sep-15-15 03:23 PM
5. "men aren't allowed to vent anymore? " In response to Reply # 0 Tue Sep-15-15 03:25 PM by legsdiamond
I actually have less respect for people who talk shit and then follow through on it.
I don't like when friends divorce.
**************** TBH the fact that you're even a mod here fits squarely within Jag's narrative of OK-sanctioned aggression, bullying, and toxicity. *shrug*
legsdiamond Member since May 05th 2011 79586 posts
Tue Sep-15-15 03:57 PM
7. "maybe he heard both sides? lol" In response to Reply # 6
I don't like when dudes vent all the time about their SO but venting every now and then is allowed.
as far as cheating... if he has hard evidence and stays it's so prolly cause he has cheated in the past.
**************** TBH the fact that you're even a mod here fits squarely within Jag's narrative of OK-sanctioned aggression, bullying, and toxicity. *shrug*
The Wordsmith Member since Aug 13th 2002 17070 posts
Tue Sep-15-15 08:04 PM
11. "My wife and I live by that." In response to Reply # 10
Extra personal stuff doesn't get mentioned to friends and family; especially venting on something really deep. The last thing anyone needs is to get and keep a salty perception of the spouse while you two have already made up.
12. "I used to be that person on okp. Not real life" In response to Reply # 0
Except for close friends. And my close friends would do the same. It was an unspoken rule that we could vent our frustrations to each other without judgement but nowadays i try not to do it in the same way. Maturity helps u learn to keep personal shit personal especially if u gone end up staying. Im glad i did stay tho. Its hard to raise kings on your own. And he is a good man. 🙋 Music is almost everything.
13. "I have a couple of buddies who.." In response to Reply # 0
shared their relationship woes, but at the end of the day, they end up staying in the relationship.
What I don't do or will not do is clown a friend who is venting. Being a friend is sometimes lending an ear when needed. I would not be much of a homie, if I talked shit behind their backs over some shit that most people do nor would I say anything overtly negative about their partners.
Good thing is that my friends understand that they chose their partners as well as chose to take the good with the bad.
17. "When y'all vent, y'all say reckless stuff like you going to leave your S..." In response to Reply # 0
I understand the concept of venting but y'all put your business on the street, talk about stepping, and then let it blow over and act like nothing happened?
********** "Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson
Movies I need y'all bastids to see so we can discuss:
19. "sometimes, yes. and i have friends and relatives who do this." In response to Reply # 17 Wed Sep-16-15 11:09 AM by SoWhat
so i take it in stride. b/c i have context for it.
at the same time i have ppl in my life w/whom i cannot vent. i've learned this about them - b/c they take that shit too literally. so i avoid doing so w/them if i can. maybe you're one of those ppl too.
21. "Oh I am probably one of those types. " In response to Reply # 19
I definitely don't believe in saying shit I don't mean and take to heart shit people say.
I am on that say what you mean and mean what you say.
>so i take it in stride. b/c i have context for it. > >at the same time i have ppl in my life w/whom i cannot vent. >i've learned this about them - b/c they take that shit too >literally. so i avoid doing so w/them if i can. maybe you're >one of those ppl too.
********** "Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson
Movies I need y'all bastids to see so we can discuss:
The Wordsmith Member since Aug 13th 2002 17070 posts
Wed Sep-16-15 11:21 AM
20. "Nah, but then again, I really don't vent about my wife." In response to Reply # 17
I can understand venting about a spouse or S.O. at a certain level (e.g. she needs her man to spend more time with her instead of his hobbies or he needs his woman to quit nagging him over trivial stuff).
However, when it comes to the level of venting you're talking about, I agree. You can't be telling me how you caught your woman French kissing another man and how you're about to leave that broad but come later in the week, you bring her around like it's all good with no type of explanation behind it.
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