http://sports.yahoo.com/soccer/blog/dirty-tackle/post/Balotelli-gave-1-000-to-hobo-probably-did-some;_ylt=ApNHGmpkfMy6ezjDsLPLJj0mw7YF?urn=sow-wp989


The last couple years have been an endless parade of Mario Balotelli doing things and then everyone else telling you how horrible those things were. Which is why this story is so jarring and might make you cry for reasons that you can't fully comprehend.

According to The Sun, Balotelli gave £1,000 cash to a homeless man after winning £25,000 inside a Manchester casino last week. The man was apparently someone Mario has come across more than once in his travels around Manchester and after his good fortune in the casino on a night out with Blackburn's Chris Samba, he was in a giving mood.

A source said: "Mario is really generous. He always hands £20 notes to the Big Issue boys without even taking the magazine. There's a guy he always sees around town with ginger dreadlocks and a beard. He carries his possessions in two carrier bags.

"He was outside the club in the early hours so Mario handed him a wad of notes after his big win. The tramp couldn't believe his luck. It was enough to keep him going for months."

Given all we've been told, this really doesn't compute, does it? I mean, ginger dreadlocks? That alone is enough to give you a migraine.

Anyway, since we know that Mario Balotelli is pretty much the most evil person to ever walk the earth and that people always fit into easily definable pigeonholes, we can rightly assume that the only reason Mario committed this tremendous act of generosity was so he could run over the happy rasta ginger with his car, collect the money he just gave the now crippled hobo and then do it all over again outside another casino the next night. This just might be why Rio Ferdinand attacked him after the FA Cup semifinal.