Because it seemed to be completely stupid. Maybe it's just over my head.

-Why does the old lady have evil Little Shop of Horrors plants?
-How can Tom Cruise drive a car right out off the assembly line and onto the freeway?
-Why the hell does he need to cut his eyes out again? Especially when he uses those very same eyes to open the door to his office.
-Why is everybody (old lady, Tim Blake Nelson, Skarsgaard, etc.) mugging like it is an SNL sketch?

I'd love to hear some satisfactory answers to these questions, but I maintain they do not exist.

This is one of the worst films I've ever seen (with a very, very good opening sequence).