I feel burned by someone who I trusted. I am so tempted to get them back. I have some good information that could fuck up the person's family and career. I have to take deep breaths and even go to church to make sure that I don't act on my feelings.

One part of me knows it is immature and not very nice. The other part of me feels like this person fucked with the wrong one and had no idea how deeply their actions would trigger me.

Anyone ever act on vengeance? Is revenge really bad? If people knew that you would seek revenge, would they be so quick to do you wrong?

Right now Romans 12:19 has kept me stable
Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.

me?



**********
"Everyone has a plan until you punch them in the face. Then they don't have a plan anymore." (c) Mike Tyson

"what's a leader if he isn't reluctant"

People can cuss me out, say mean things. But when they do something to me that impacts my physical, mental, financial and emotional self. For example, their actions resulted in me being put in a dangerous situation, left abandoned, severely inconvenienced, money unnecessarily wasted, then I feel like vengeance is about to be unleashed.

I do think in general we underestimate how people respond to being treated poorly.

I once had someone fired. The person did some tricky shit and didn't know I had a kept a paper trail of our emails, conversations and documents. I admit it felt good to know i caused something bad to happen to the person.

If they burned you out of cash or something like that then fuck it. Losers stay losers. Just keep yourself away from them.

... I still think about it near daily.

http://board.okayplayer.com/okp.php?az=show_topic&forum=4&topic_id=12947583&mesg_id=12947583&listing_type=search


Anyway, I'd be curious to know more details about your situation (1) to better diagnose the way *I'd* respond and (2) cause I'm nosy as fuck. But I understand if you don't want to divulge any further. None of my business, obviously.

But yea I mean, ideally you should be the bigger man, let it go, find your peace, etc. But I fully understand wanting to absolutely destroy someone who's significantly wronged you (i.e. the above post). And the big picture current social/political/sociopolitical climate of the last few years doesn't help my "shit, fuck everybody" mindset at all. So I'm sure I'm far from alone in that regard.

I don't really feel like hashing out details. But we agreed to something, I made financial sacrifices and emotional sacrifices. When circumstances changed that made the person have to make a big decision, they threw me under the bus, instead of someone else.

I was basically the sacrificial lamb. The person didn't even apologize.

It hurts and I am angry. I want to act on these feelings.

Yes I agree our current political climate and social environment is all about revenge, as opposed to penance.

I am spiritual and believe in God, Allah, Moses, Buddah and any damn body else who will keep me from doing dark shit. So right now I am not going to do anything.

As I said I empathize with how you're feeling and *fully* understand where you're coming from.

But, it sounds like it may not be worth the kind of revenge you're considering. Like someone else already said, if there's gonna be collateral damage (the family) then it's probably better left not done.

Peace to you - hope you can find the right solution.

Like, sort of make things a little awkward or ruin them?

If it's closer to ruin them, think VERY carefully, because they're going to feel justified in coming back on you.

Lose their job, put their family life in disarray and confusion.

shitty people always get what's coming to them

I wish that were true. But the events of the last 2 years, if nothing else, should prove to you and everyone that this is just patently false.


>shitty people always get what's coming to them

I meant the average every day shitbag will pay for it in the end

I used to be a firm believer in karma but I kind of fell off that wagon a little bit.

... that you speak of specifically as a *result* of being a shitty person. And nothing bad ever came to him, karma never caught up with him. And Trump benefited from his shitty person father, and now himself continues being a shitty person and winning, while raising shitty kids who also continue to do just fine.

Maybe someday that will change. Hopefully. But.

I cant think of a person who's shitted on me (and there have been a lot) who is doing well now

Who says “they shitted on me and now they are doing awesome!”

Most times we stop caring to follow up on folks who shit on us.

I think on some level, people can cover their tracks and get away with shady behavior.
Without checks and balances of someone coming for their ass, more people would try to get away with hurting people.

I do believe in holding people accountable for bad behavior. But I also agree that it can become a vicious cycle.

Just don't do people dirty in the first place.

I sure wish Karma was true but it isn’t.

Sometimes I think people who shit on others to get ahead.. just continue to get ahead until someone shits on them.

I wouldn’t get anyone fired or fuck over a family unless it was some life or death shit.

>I sure wish Karma was true but it isn’t.
>
>Sometimes I think people who shit on others to get ahead..
>just continue to get ahead until someone shits on them.
>
>I wouldn’t get anyone fired or fuck over a family unless it
>was some life or death shit.

would be a place I wouldn't want to go. Especially if their fam had nothing to do with it.

and cut them off.


the vengeance ain't worth it.

no collateral damage (leave the family out of it)

n/m

If someone intentionally set out to do you wrong then they deserve the payback.

If they were just thoughtless and did something without taking you into consideration, maybe that's another story.

I don't believe in all that, "the universe will right itself and that person will eventually pay," stuff. There are too many terrible people who do well for that to be true. I have no problem taking matters into my own hands.

> I don't believe in all that, "the universe will right itself
>and that person will eventually pay," stuff. There are too
>many terrible people who do well for that to be true. I have
>no problem taking matters into my own hands.

Revenge is underrated. God and Karma take too long. Do it...

LOL. I hear you sis! I feel like going in.

You came out the woods to cosign revenge!


I know it is a human emotion. But I am very honest about when I feel scorned to help me work through these emotions.

I had a (mostly) platonic male friend who engaged in verbal, emotional, financial and physical abuse. He was a serial liar and his fibbing cost me big time. We had a few verbal agreements related to money and business, and he failed to honor our pacts. I tried to help him out of quasi-homelessness, and I lost several thousand dollars and incurred additional debt.

Although our relationship ended in spring 2017, I have considered engaging his biological parents; his aunt, who sat on his B.S. nonprofit's board; a couple of his youth athletic training clients' parents; his "spiritual father," a local pastor; a family friend of his parents and a former neighbor, a lawyer; the IRS division responsible for his nonprofit's status as a 501(c)3 and the local police department who filed a report following our domestic dispute.

Yeah, more than a year has passed but I'm still dealing with the aftermath, especially when it comes to $$$. I told him earlier this year and he had no remorse.

This man has lived a double-life and he is dangerous. He needs to be exposed for his shady behavior.

Thing is, I don't consider contacting these people and entities vengeance, though it probably is.

Your explanation seems to indicate that you want fairness and accountability. But some people might interpret it as a bad intention. But really you might be helping someone else by calling out his bullshit.

That is how I justify my decision. I am protecting another person from this person's bullshit.

Think about how you want to hold the person accountable.

Generally speaking I am against this kind of thing. You should also think about how getting back at this person would affect people close to them who may be completely innocent.

I’m sure you know that as a spiritual person :-)

that can take away your self worth. You have your health, you have your family, and you have your life to live. Whatever you do, do with the right intentions. If the intentions are there, then no one can take that from you. They may block certain doors to success, but you will find your way and, moreover, be able to do them more on your own terms.

One day, I hope you will look back on this and be GRATEFUL to this person. Because whatever money or opportunity they "robbed" you of was really an important lesson on the whos and hows of you working with other people in the pursuit of your dreams. Later in life you may even be able to look back and thank God that you gained this perspective then, so you can see it for what it is when it happens again and then handle it differently now that you have the hindsight.

Don't waste your time and energy on what you already lost (assuming legal action would not be worth it). There is nothing someone can do to you that can take away your own worth. That is for you to determine and share with the world in YOUR own way.