of the 20 years I never knew how much that nigga loved me.
if he even did...
I goggled him again last night


what y’all got up for the weekend?
me?
having dinner and drinks with friends after work. then I’ll spend the rest of the weekend getting my apartment ready for my mother’s visit next weekend.


we family, right?

Like you may think that's a good idea and conceptually it is.
But I can assure you as a man that knows myself and knowsbother men. The world does not need men to be MORE emotional by any stretch of measure.

They don’t and couldn’t handle it if they were

a step further than expressive...communicative

emotional niggas

.

Is a thought that goes through my head daily.
I couldn't imagine being more emotional

problem. But who's trying to fist fight in their thirties.

.

either he needs to pay rent of kick him the fuck out.

"Get ready....for your blessing....."

whoever was around was just a rebound..
I call it recess (c) rapsody

quantity?
Love is love.
He obviously loved/s you.
But love isn't enough to sustain a long term relationship.

"Get ready....for your blessing....."

There was a period of time when I knew he cared. It’s how I began to care.

and I believe only love can sustain relationships.

>There was a period of time when I knew he cared. It’s how I
>began to care.

So you don't want to know how much he loved you, you want to know how much he cared. That's valid, but it seems like his absence and the fluctuations of the intensity of expressing his care for you already equip you with the answer you're looking for. Sometimes...MOST times...the act of "Saying" or "telling" someone is nothing more than an unnecessary formality IMO.


>and I believe only love can sustain relationships.
Love isn't the only thing that can strengthen or support a relationship. And it damn sure can't do it all on its own. If that's all a relationship has is love...then it's doomed from the start. If that's all a broad relationship is whittled down to after some years, then it's doomed to eventually end.

"Get ready....for your blessing....."

I’d rather not get into a discussion about what constitutes love because I know where I was at during that period of my life.

I guess It bothers me because he could never be clear why he wouldn’t let go despite my pleads or maybe I missed it...

a lot of us need to communicate better tho.

Y'all too judge-y.

Watch the championship game to see how emo we get when we're free to be, lol.

"You need to calm down"
when I said that ain't nothing funny
Like
Like
We really have to operate on parallel brain waves to simply interact with women
I can't imagine a scenario where I'm arguing with a dude, he laughs, and I don't just spaz out for a split second.

might have been Deray Davis...talkin about a woman will wait til yall in public and say some shit like "nigga, you wasn't saying that when you wanted to kill yoself!"

against him when arguing. Had him thinking about ending it all.

lol, I kinda fucked it up, though. It was Deray, at least.
https://youtu.be/_TnA6o9UjwQ?t=203

DST with the killer reference above.

The only women I fight with are my GF and my mom. Sidepieces and shit, hell nah, if you got beef then fuck off til it's resolved. But my mom after years of being the only woman that didn't hit below the belt is now ruthless with it. I'll be goddamned if my GF is gonna go the same way. The other day she did it for the first time, basically threw it in my face that one of my exes cheated on me, and I was no, we are not playing that fucking game. She knows how sensitive she is and what she's shared with me and was smart enough to realize it wasn't a path she wanted to travel down. But it's crazy how fast women lose control of their emotions and how quick they can be to do a 180. Like with my girlfriend or my best friend or parents or whomever, I have never gotten so pissed that I lost sight of who they are and what they meant. A lot of women will lose sight of all that and go 200 miles an hour in the opposite direction the second they feel hurt or threatened.

watching football with other dudes means they're all acting the same in Man world.

we don't let each other display less 'man' behavior. not saying dudes need to be mushy outchea, but I really don't think we have many honest discussions without trying to be Men.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVUkmCP677M
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dPw55zZTkKs


I've noticed that men can be much more emotionally-expressive in contexts like that. Also when one male friend is going through a rough patch, he can express himself among the other male friends without having to worry about that shit changing the relationship dynamic, or being brought up later to shame that person.

I took your initial post as dudes watching a game and yelling at the tv. that type of group setting usually has certain types of emotional highs and bravado.

what Trin is talking about is male/female relationships. some dudes aren't good at being vulnerable with women. some dudes don't communicate enough. some dudes think they'll be seen as soft of they emote in the company of women. seen a ton of examples like this. I have cousins that are like that.

but we put a timer on that shit.

Especially during break ups. You get to talk about it once in depth, can’t be coming over having the same convo about the same shit.

She gone dog!!!

>Especially during break ups. You get to talk about it once in
>depth, can’t be coming over having the same convo about the
>same shit.

I give it a month or two with relationships. That shit is deep and takes some time to unplug from. Sometimes a dudes' friends can be his only connection to the real world (and not bizzaro relationship world).

.

after halftime, we're done talking bruh. lol

ain't no group of dudes trying to hear a nigga talk about his failed relationship every time they get together. Especially if niggas on the clock

that shit'll get you killed

I think of it not so much in the sense of which you're ascribing, I think of my father-in-law who is fiery emotional and very much so in the vain of, "I'M GOING TO CLAP BACK AT WHOMEVER, WHENEVER." Yes, he has the years of seasoning to know right from wrong, like he said, "When I turned 50, I realized I couldn't whoop everybody's @$$ anymore." So, it took that reality (age) for him to settle down, but it didn't change his desire to be as "matter of fact" as he could be, to assert his "dominance".

Having said this...he's uber-emotional and because he still (at 67) has issues navigating his "sensitive" side he has peculiar ways of dealing with them, especially when he can't get his way.

Me..I'm sensitive (and cordial...and pretty well-read on situations...last to speak), but I'm also hard to read (poker game skrong). From where I sit, and this is solely my opinion, you're looking for a dude to engage that "sensitive". Pardon if I misspoke. Enjoy the weekend :).

probably wasn’t the best choice of a post title but, you know me. lol

Ironically. I can’t figure out my emotions. Im still trying putting pieces together. Like, when he told me he was a coward. In my mind I was thinking, “nigga I’ll fight for you”.

bear with me. I don’t know how to give it all to you at one time :-)

Like I said, I like your openness. Hope it leads to the type of success you're lookin' fo'!

it just manifests differently.

I would argue that men are MORE emotional than women because in many instances women are socialised to hide their feelings.

Men are socialized to hide their emotions (except anger)

Men aren't given the tools or the support to manage their feelings. It's a shame really.

It just makes you less expressive (as reply 2 pointed out) and more likely to be emotionally unhealthy or explosive. The emotions are still there whether you express them or not.

Beyond that, one could definitely argue that men are taught to hide emotions more, but my main point is my subject line.

Men are emotional as shit, hence the funneling of all of their emotions into recent movements like the alt right, tea party, gamergate etc. Instead of properly examining how and why they feel a certain way and expressing those emotions in more healthy ways, they lash out. In many ways society seems to say the only emotion that men can express is anger, and no matter if they are experiencing anger or not it is often expressed that way.

I won't deny that sometimes women are socialized into hiding emotions and they do it by just pushing the emotions down, but so often they are also told their emotions don't exist. As a test, look at any comment section when a women writes an article expressing her feelings about being sexually assaulted/harassed and see how many people, particularly men, try to insinuate the woman was feeling contrary to what her own words say! Some women internalize those views, and start to really believe that their very valid feelings aren't valid and never existed.

>Men are emotional as shit, hence the funneling of all of
>their emotions into recent movements like the alt right, tea
>party, gamergate etc. Instead of properly examining how and
>why they feel a certain way and expressing those emotions in
>more healthy ways, they lash out. In many ways society seems
>to say the only emotion that men can express is anger, and no
>matter if they are experiencing anger or not it is often
>expressed that way.
>
>I won't deny that sometimes women are socialized into hiding
>emotions and they do it by just pushing the emotions down, but
>so often they are also told their emotions don't exist. As a
>test, look at any comment section when a women writes an
>article expressing her feelings about being sexually
>assaulted/harassed and see how many people, particularly men,
>try to insinuate the woman was feeling contrary to what her
>own words say! Some women internalize those views, and start
>to really believe that their very valid feelings aren't valid
>and never existed.

..a better communicator.

some days I just want to tell folks how I’m feeling because I don’t in real life.

I think imma get white girl wasted tonight lol

have a wonderful weekend :-)

>I think imma get white girl wasted tonight lol

I'm going on getaway this weekend and gonna have likka on deck.

>I think imma get white girl wasted tonight lol
>

The young woman was Latina and decided to go away for college. She said one of the reasons she chose to go to the school was to experience differences in culture. One of them was to see people get 'white people wasted'. I was dying.

you know the feeling I'm talking about... when something just drains you for the rest of the day like a hangover or a workout or not enough sleep and too much coffee.. or no coffee when you really really need it.

I find as an emotional guy I need to be careful about engaging in interactions with other emotional folks.. I've also learned to be more discerning about where and when I invest emotionally... live and learn.

I had to make a trip to the ER and take a few days off work. . something is going on with my heart. The heart beat is irregular. I’m carrying too many burdens.

Scared the life out of son...

or at the very least have the ability to be selfish in a different way than women.

I had a situationship like this with a girl from the time i was like 18-26...basically were together when we were in the same location, she'd come visit, i'd visit...I would say i loved her, we had a deep connection. but i was also young & immature in some ways, bad at communicating my wants/needs, & selfish.

In my head (& many men's heads) the "you knew what this was" defense is impenetrable. Around that age I was just learning the basic frameworks of feminism & took "I was honest in my words about this one thing" ("I don't think we should be in a relationship") to absolve me of any wrongdoing. In my head, it was 2015! If she had an issue with it she could just say so & it would be no hard feelings! I didn't want to take away her agency!

It wasn't until I eventually started dating a new woman that I started learning what it meant to actually communicate, & expanded my understanding of feminism. I really look back on those years & had to apologize to this other woman for (what I felt) was taking advantage.

Yes, she could have left at any point. Yes, I said I didn't want to be in a relationship. Yes, we were adults & could make our own choices. But I also know that I was socialized in a way that didn't place a value on women in that way (yea yea, I was a "gentleman" & would make sure no one "disrespected" them, but I wasn't critical of what was going on in my own house, so to speak) & she was socialized in a way that the power dynamic was never actually equal between us.

Often times men can rationalize this, but at least for me, I've gotten to a point where I recognize how my inability to communicate my wants/needs + selfishness fostered by the society I was raised in led to me not really being as "good" a person as I'd like to be.

Thank you :-)