She’s staying with my sister so if I visit my sister at her house, my mom just shadows me the entire time.

We have no relationship at all because I cut her off. I’ve spoken on this here and there over the years, but by “cut her off” I mean “stopped being her personal ATM/Cab and stopped initiating interaction” and for years she can’t be bothered to call or visit just to call or visit… or visit her grandchildren, even after I moved to a place ten minutes away.

So I made peace with the fact that this is the way it is. In fact, it’s better this way. It’s not ideal but when finally get free of people who do nothing but suck the life and resources out of you, you see the difference. I stress less, I worry less, and I’m less inclined to ride to the rescue when she’s out of sight & mind.

Here’s the thing: they got evicted from their house. “their” house was *my* house that I rented and moved them in because they were homeless and I left because I was tired of cops showing up, doors getting ripped off hinges, windows getting broken, never paying their share of rent or bills while constantly asking for money.

So I’m there the other day and my mom says she wants to talk to me, that she needs me, that she needs “her babies” -meaning my kids- and that she wants to be a part of our lives.

Sounds sincere, right?

Maybe.

But then.... my sister let them move in in December and gave them a hard deadline of March 1st.

March 1st is five days away.

Let’s just say that given her complete absence in my life over the last decade outside times of need or my own efforts, the timing of this isn’t lost on me.

I’m probably going to hear her out but if that discussion turns into asking to move in I don’t think I’ll even give her the courtesy of telling her no. Frankly I think I’ll just get up and leave.

For those who think that’s harsh/cold/callous and I’m some sort of uncaring monster, I totally understand.

Just, you know, give me your address and I’ll send her your way.

Then she can sit on her ass drinking all day in your home, smoke around your children, rip all your doors off their hinges, break all your windows, put holes in your walls, spew all sorts of horrible and hurtful things and generate countless visits from the police while her husband nickle & dimes you on the rent every Friday and asks to “borrow a few bucks to get a few things” by Monday, those “few things” being alcohol and cigarettes for himself and my mom in order to fuel everything else I mentioned.

All I know is I’m not carrying that burden again and I’m damn sure not going to subject my wife and children to that chaos.