31696, let the church say... Posted by LexM, Mon Oct-24-05 12:47 PM
>we need to give our men more credit than this. In my >experience, most black men are not out to impregnate the >entire female population. Infact, most of them are good, >decent, kindhearted brothas working on being financially >secure and havethemselves together spiritually and >emotionally...they are grounded. They want to love and be >loved just like we do. So a lot of these negative views about >black men come from propaganda and misrepresentation. The >answer is simple...treat every black man as he is a potential >husband...then all that other bullshit..'will he be >faithful?'...'can he handle being with a career woman like >myself?'...etc etc etc...all that bullshit disintegrates.
i agree...generally, if they're not up to being treated that way, they will run for the hills, trust.
>Too often, sistas wanna take the easy >option...buying into this Western quickfix culture...they want >a brotha who already has it made- already owns his own home, >already has money to pay their bills, already has his own >business, already has a nice car...I think its unfair and >unrealistic. We need to be willing to grow with our men- lets >support eachother! i don't mind working hard...starting from >scratch...with very little...while we attain our mutual goals >that will ultimately give us an abundance of all that good >stuff.
again, agreed.
you don't have to have it ALL together. but if you have that vision and you're working towards a goal, i have no problem being right there with you.
>treat every black man as tho he is a potential husband. >Befriend ALL types of black men...muslim brothas, young >brothas, gay brothas, older cats. That is the best way for us >women to get a good and fair understanding of black men...and >before we judge them and buy into b/s propaganda, I think we >should at least be able to say we have been open to them all.
*nods*
having been fortunate enough to have a good father in my life and knowing many sistas who don't, i think this is especially important.
you can never replace "daddy", but opening oneself to those friendships is essential if you are to grow into a good relationship in the future.
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