In the Feminine Divine Post(which is archived). I agree w/ U that the man is the head/lead, BUT I think I always envisioned that MEANING that it's okay for him to lead, as long as he's steering the ship in the direction that I wanted to go anyway. That takes the "pressure" off me, so that I could focus on 'map-reading, navigation strategy, ship upkeep, detailing & repairs'(LOL!), just to stay w/ that analogy.

I went to school w/ this white dude, who is an Orthodox Christian(I know your system is not based on Christianity, but just work wit' me on this). He told me the same thing, essentially, AND I've read it for myself in Corinthians I. He told me that, in his relationship w/ his wife, in MOST things, he just goes along w/ what she wants, or has 2 say. He said that if she asked for his advice, he would give it. Sometimes he would just offer it. He said that ONLY when he disagreed w/ her decision STRONGLY(and he prefaced that those occasions were rare), then he would say, "No, I hear you, but we need to do it this way." He also acknowledged that the TRUE head of his household was God, and that Ultimately, they both(along w/ their daughter), answered to God, and followed The Word. In your case though, I guess U and your mate would say, God was him. *shaking head* I get it, it's just....I could see how a dude could run amuck w/ that type of "power" over the household, w/o ANY other authority, beyond himself, to whom he answered. Which begs the next q., which is, where does the Earth have any freedom, in that? And why struggle(historically, as a people), gain Knowledge of Self(or do only the Gods have Knowledge of Self, and if so, then what do the Earths have, Wisdom about Self?), only to end up in a relationship where U aren't free? That's all. *shrugs*

>> this is where i get
>really 'old school'. in my personal life/home/family, the man
>is the head/leader. now, that being said, i continue to be as
>opinionated and willed as i was before i entered into this
>relationship. and he recieves what i bring to the table with
>no fuss. if he's set on doing something a certain way and i
>can show him a better way, of course he will do the better
>way. he will not punish me or our family for being right, nor
>will he stubbornly resist my advice. we are a partnership and
>we work together. now, on the occassion that we clash on
>something, he does has the final say. i am better at some
>things and he is better at some things. there's no competition
>when we are both working on the same team, towards a common
>goal.