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Forum nameOkay Activist Archives
Topic subjectRE: Sistahs, what's the verdict?
Topic URLhttp://board.okayplayer.com/okp.php?az=show_topic&forum=22&topic_id=31578&mesg_id=31617
31617, RE: Sistahs, what's the verdict?
Posted by the_best_part, Fri Oct-21-05 10:10 AM
>1. Do we REALLY need a man, if we are financially stable,
>have our own homes, already have children(or don't want any),
>and I guess know how to go to Rite Aid for batteries when need
>be? LOL!

we need men. plenty can be accomplished without a man. so it's not a diss to the strength or ability of sisters. however, it isnt ideal or natural to be without a man. for one, we can't have children without men. we can raise them without men, but it leaves a void(admitted or not) in that child's life. women need men, men need women. it's just the way the cipher's designed. i think that the 'i dont need a man' attitude is harmful, especially among 'our' people.

>2. Polygamy: should we stop "fakin' the funk", w/ all these
>babydaddies, and sleepin' around w/ other people's husbands,
>etc., and just say 'F*** it, we just need to go on and become
>a polygamous society w/in a monagamous society-at-large'? & if
>we let Brothahs do this, do you think they could handle
>it(financially, emotionally & Spiritually w/o letting that Ego
>run amuck)?

i dont think that polygyny is such a bad idea. but the man must be able to afford multiple wives. he'd have to be very secure and confident in his manhood and ability to lead, provide, teach, and attend. i'd say, if a man can effectively maintain peace in his home with wives that work together for the good of the family and respect one another, why not? now days, a woman without a man is vulnerable. is he not our protector? there are too many women, not enough men. i dont see why people think polygyny is so outrageous. it seems like a natural and ancient way to do things.

>3. MRS vs MS degree: is it a "worthy sacrifice" to focus on
>obtaining education, career, getting your business started(or
>whatever the case may be), BEFORE pursuing marriage(or
>otherwise committed relationship), or possibly, at the expense
>of?

i dont think one has to negate the other...career or relationship.

>4. OTHERS: IF it's really true that there is a shortage of
>marriagable Brothahs statistically(due to the down-low<the
>estimates are as high as 80% of African-American men engage in
>this behavior, btw>, outright homosexuality, eternal
>bachelorhood, into white women, in jail, on drugs,
>blah-zay,blah-zay, blah-zay, you know the drill...), then
>should we look to other types/races/ethnicities of men? If
>not, then what is the solution?

if we look to other races, we lose, they win. solution would begin with changing our entire way of thinking(lynchism) and it manifesting in our ways and actions and spreading thru out first the black family and then the community, so forth and so on. our black men have it hard enough in this society without their women abandoning them for their oppressors.

>5. I worked in Kenya in '02, where it is believed that a
>female does not become a woman until she gives birth. Agreed,
>or disagreed?

i would say that having a child certainly catapults a female into an entirely new level of being a woman. but it is not what makes a female a woman. i know plenty of 'women' that dont have children and aren't any less a woman than myself or others that have given birth.


these are good questions/issues for discussion.